Second Chances at the Little Bookshop

By

Katie Ginger

Copyright © Katie Ginger September 2024

Katie Ginger asserts the moral right to be identified as the author of this work.

A catalogue record for this book is available from the British Library.

This novel is entirely a work of fiction. The names, characters and incidents portrayed in it are the work of the author’s imagination. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, events or localities is entirely coincidental.

All rights reserved.

E-book Edition © September 2024 ISBN: 978-1-8380511-9-8

To all my readers everywhere,

THANK YOU!

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

Chapter 6

Chapter 7

Chapter 8

Chapter 9

Chapter 10

Chapter 11

Chapter 12

Chapter 13

Chapter 14

Chapter 15

Chapter 16

Chapter 17

Chapter 18

Chapter 19

Chapter 20

Chapter 21

Chapter 22

Chapter 23

Chapter 24

Chapter 25

Chapter 26

Chapter 27

Chapter 28

Chapter 29

Chapter 1

When Nora had taken the job of receptionist at a posh law firm in London, she’d imagined it would be like one of those glossy TV programmes. The type full of nice-smelling handsome men dressed head to foot in Saville Row, marching purposefully about or lounging in glass-walled offices on impractical cream sofas. Between answering the telephone, she’d stroll in and out of meeting rooms, her pert bum jiggling in the sexy skirt and blouse combo she’d thrown on that morning after a wild night out. Her glossy hair would, of course, fall in soft waves over her shoulders without so much as a hint of effort, and she’d toss it back with a cheeky flick of a manicured hand before heading to lunch with one with of the numerous hip and energetic friends she’d made in the big city.

Unsurprisingly, it hadn’t ended up like that at all.

Whilst the office did contain lots of glass walls, impractical cream sofas and glossy-haired women, she hadn’t managed to become one of them. Heavy hump-day air weighed on Nora’s slumped shoulders that were encased in yesterday’s cheap, scratchy shirt sporting a vague whiff of the red wine she’d necked last night. Despite searching, she hadn’t been able to find any trace of it anywhere and yet, the smell remained. Splaying her hands on the MDF desk, Nora leaned forward to see if Scott, her best friend from work and the one who kept her sane in this Saville Row filled world, had finished his ten-thirty meeting. It had lasted for absolutely ages, which wasn’t normally a problem, but today was different.

Most days, if Scott were late, she’d just read her book and pretend to rattle away at the mountain of letters that needed typing, feigning enthusiasm if anyone passed by, but the text message she’d received ten minutes earlier had shaken her. The little ping that signalled its arrival had brought with it a sense of dread as soon as she’d seen who it was from. The longer Scott took, the heavier that dread became, settling like a giant boulder in her stomach, pulling her over so she folded in on herself. Resisting the urge to read it for the millionth time, Nora hid the phone under her copy of Rebecca and glanced once more down the hall.

The tapping of high-heels and polished brogues heralded the end of the meeting and the mass exodus of attendees. She watched Scott say goodbye, cracking jokes that were met with horsey laughs and Etonian guffaws and within seconds the visitors had disappeared leaving just her and her tall, handsome best friend.

Scott’s implacable professional smile faded as soon as the lift doors closed, and he flopped over the shelf at the front of the reception desk. ‘That was absolute torture. I am so bored of discussing the ins and outs of this take-over. We’ve gone over everything a million times and if one of them doesn’t agree to the terms soon I’ll die of boredom.’ Nora batted his limply hanging hand out of the way and grabbed her phone, pushing Rebecca aside. He turned his head from its resting place on the cool fake wood veneer. ‘What’s the matter with you? Has someone actually been honest and told you how bad your hair looks today?’ He pulled a sympathetic yet teasing face.

‘Ha, ha.’ He was, in fact, right about the bad hair day but luckily no one had pointed it out as yet. Nora had overslept again and an entire can of dry shampoo hadn’t injected any life into the wilted mess on her head. The loose sexy waves she’d always imagined were more wet lettuce than vintage vixen and where she’d used so much, certain areas of her head looked grey rather than brown. ‘Ignoring my terrible hair for two minutes, look at this.’ She held out her phone. ‘This is serious.’

Seeing her face, Scott straightened up, his suit jacket remarkably un-crumpled by his lolloping, and took the phone. As he read the text message his deep brown eyes widened. ‘Your dad’s having a sixtieth birthday party?’ he asked incredulously.

To anyone else, this statement would have seemed perfectly normal. A lot of people celebrated milestone birthdays with parties large or small and a good time had by all. Only Nora’s family were different. Nora’s family were what psychologists called dysfunctional. And though Nora had planned to send a nice card and gift in the post, they hadn’t actually spoken to each other in over a year. The Bell’s didn’t really get on and it was a fact they’d accepted with alacrity, simply going their separate ways. Her sister had moved a few towns away when she’d got married and her parents had, and always would, do their own thing. After ‘The Incident’ as Nora always referred to it when speaking to Scott, her relationship with her sister had been ruined with very little chance of recovery. Even thinking of it now caused an unpleasant sensation to build in Nora’s throat.

‘And it’s this weekend!’ Scott exclaimed. ‘Jeez, Nor. Your family are crazy with a capital F. Who gives someone – a family member – two days’ notice of a huge family party?’

‘It’s Saturday, so I suppose it’s technically three days.’ Scott gave a reproving look. ‘I know, I know. It’s still ridiculous. Just typical Bell family madness.’

‘Are you going?’

Nora shrugged and her cheap shirt, that was cut weirdly short in the body but had enormous sleeves, came un-tucked from her waist. ‘I’d rather visit the dentist for a root canal followed by the doctor for a smear test. Do you think I can pretend I didn’t see the text?’ Just as she said this, another message pinged into existence. A quick glance showed it was also from her mum. She hadn’t received more than one text message every six months since she moved away from home aged 23. Sometimes her mum had gone a whole year without contacting her only for Nora to receive a drunken, emoji filled message on Christmas Day. To receive two in the space of half an hour was extraordinary. She read it aloud. ‘Did you get my message earlier? Are you coming? Your sister is. We’ve got something important to tell you.’

Scott sucked air in through his teeth like mechanics do when they’re deciding what random price to charge for changing a tyre. ‘Sounds pretty serious, Nor.’

‘I bet it’s not. I could just call her. I’ll tell her I’m working this weekend – doing overtime – and won’t be able to make it down.’ This time Scott pushed the air out through his mouth making his cheeks puff.

‘I don’t know, Nor, that just feels a bit mean.’

‘Mean? I know it might look like that but trust me, you don’t know my family.’ A third message arrived which Nora read aloud. ‘And we want to tell you all together at the party so if you don’t come, you’ll miss out. I’m not telling you over the phone.’ Nora scrunched up her face so her left eye closed. ‘Well, that puts the final nail in that coffin. I have to go, don’t I?’ She let her hands drop to her sides and stared up at the ceiling, silently praying for help or a believable excuse to pop into her brain.

‘Looks like it, darling. Sorry. What do you think they have to tell you?’

‘I have no idea. Knowing my parents, it could be anything. They’re always doing crazy shit. Do you remember when Mum took up that weird frog-licking thing that makes you sick to supposedly cleanse your spirit?’

‘Kambo.’

‘Bless you.’

‘No,’ Scott rolled his eyes. ‘It’s called Kambo.’

‘Oh. The point is, she was plastering it all over Facebook. That she hasn’t done that with whatever this is—’ She glanced again at her phone. ‘And has summoned us all together makes me very suspicious.’ A fourth text message pinged.

Scott said, ‘Well, as only me and your mother text you, and I haven’t sent anything in the last thirty seconds, this also has to be from Mamma Bell. What does it say?’

‘Stop looking like you’re enjoying this,’ Nora teased.

He held his hand to his chest, affronted. ‘I’m not enjoying it, it’s just extraordinary. I’ve never known a family work like yours does.’

Nora huffed and read the message. ‘I need to know today for the party. And you’ll need to sort out somewhere to stay. Urgh.’ Her stomach gave a loud rumble. ‘I need lunch before I think about this anymore, it’s making me feel queasy.’

They hastily left the building and dived into one of the fancy cafés just around the corner from their office. The spring sunshine shone on the city, hiding the blemishes and replacing the dreariness of winter. Spying an empty space in the corner, Scott sent Nora to save some seats while he went to grab the food. She hiked up onto a stool in front of a large indoor pot plant and placed her coat next to her to reserve the space. Before long, Scott was back with bright green juice drinks and salads.

Nora took hers, eyeing it suspiciously. ‘I was hoping you’d bring me coffee and something monstrously carb filled with my body weight in cheese on top.’

‘I’ve done this because I love you,’ he said, ‘The other night you were moaning about your skirt leaving gaping war wounds in your flesh.’

‘I’m sure it was the way I was sitting.’

‘I know,’ he replied with a grin. ‘But they’ve run out of jacket potatoes and only had tuna sandwiches left.’ Nora made a gagging sound. ‘Plus, if you have salad now you won’t feel bad later when we drink copious amounts of wine and order an extra-large pizza.’

All true, and only something Scott could say without causing offence. They’d hit it off as soon as she’d started working at Maxwell and Staunton’s, one of the biggest law firms in London. Though Scott was a senior associate, he’d been one of the only ones to talk to Nora on a team night out and save her blushes when, feeling awkward, she’d had far too many shots and vomited in a hand basin in the ladies. They were the type of friends that just clicked and before long, when Nora’s evil landlord put the rent up on her grubby flat above a kebab shop, he insisted she take the tiny spare room in his flat in Shoreditch. There was barely enough space for her and the special first editions she spent all her spare money on, but it was a sacrifice worth making as far as she was concerned. Nora was also one of the few people to have met his boyfriend. Of course, Scott had had boyfriends before, but like Nora, not all of them made it home.

She took a sip of her drink and groaned. ‘What is this?’

‘It’s a green juice.’

‘It’s disgusting. I imagine this pot plant tastes nicer.’ She pushed one of the giant plastic leaves away and it bounced back and hit her in the face. Scott giggled. ‘What’s in it?’

‘I don’t know. Green? So, what are you going to do about this party?’ He attempted to fold an enormous salad leaf into his mouth. Once he’d managed it, he added, ‘From what you’ve told me about your delinquent family it’ll be utter chaos. It could be fun.’

Nora took another sip of her drink which was improving if she didn’t smell it first. ‘As much as I hate to admit it, I think I’m going to have to go. If Dad’s got some sort of announcement to make and Kathryn’s going, then I have to. And I suppose he’ll only turn 60 once.’

‘You don’t think—’ Scott hesitated, and Nora waited for him to continue. ‘Sorry, but I have to say it, you don’t think he’s sick or something do you?’

She immediately shook her head. That was her first thought when she read the text message but had decided it was unlikely. ‘I wouldn’t put it past them to announce something terrible mid-Macarena, but again, I refer you to item A, our conversation earlier where I told you about Facebook. When Dad had a problem with his prostate, Mum splashed it all over social media before she told any of her children. Or that time Mum freaked out that she had breast cancer because her nipple had inverted, and it turned out she’d shrunk her bra in the tumble dryer. So no, I don’t think it’s that.’

‘Divorce?’

‘Doubt it.’ Her father’s extra-marital activities had never really been hidden from the Bell children, though it had all calmed down in the last decade or so. The ageing process hadn’t been kind to Dominic (‘call me Dom the Domino’) Bell and somehow, her mother had stuck with him. More fool her, thought Nora, but it was her mum’s life to live how she chose. It was a wonder she was so well adjusted really.

‘I find it so odd that your mum will update you on private family matters via public announcement but won’t text or call for months at a time. It’s – it’s—’ He waved a loaded fork in the air.

‘Weird?’

‘Yep.’ He shoved the food in his mouth and began digging around for more. ‘Really weird.’

She’d accepted the strangeness of it a long time ago. Scott had the luxury of a family with a strong moral compass and sense of decency. His mum and dad had known Scott was gay long before he came out to them and when he did, they threw him a party and made it clear they were proud of him and loved him regardless of his sexual orientation. Nora’s mum on the other hand had no filter, no shame, and enjoyed the idea that as soon as her children hit age eighteen, they were on their own and no longer her responsibility. Nora also blamed her mum’s reliance on social media on her dad who’d been absent for long periods of time, shacking up with other women who inevitably kicked him out when the excitement wore off. In loneliness, she’d simply turned to socials for support. It was sad, really.

They finished lunch by discussing random office politics, who’s turn it was to tidy the flat (Scott’s, though he strongly denied it), and who’s turn it was to cook (Nora’s, though she strongly denied it), but on the way back to the office, Scott broached the subject once more.

‘You know, Nor, you could always go and turn it into a little holiday. You’ve got loads of annual leave left. And you did say Little Harbour is actually a gorgeous place.’

‘Hmmm.’ Nora narrowed her eyes, a sneaking suspicion mounting.

‘And I could come with you’ he added nonchalantly. ‘I could do with a little weekend break at the seaside.’

‘I knew it!’ She bashed him on the arm. ‘Would you come with me to the party? You can be my plus one.’

‘Of course. We can book a little cottage for the weekend, leave early Friday and have a pamper sesh, chill out Saturday before the party and come back late Sunday. I’ll even do the driving. What d’you reckon?’

Maybe it wasn’t such a bad idea after all. She could call into the bookshop she’d adored so much growing up and see how Abe was. It had been two years since Muriel, his wife, had died. That had been her last fleeting visit home and fleeting it most certainly had been, especially when Abe and Muriel’s son and Nora’s first love (she wouldn’t dwell on that too much), Alex had brought his new girlfriend. A petite, curvaceous thing that even looked pretty when she cried.

A trip to her most favourite bookstore in the world and a pamper session in a pretty seaside cottage? When she put it like it that it didn’t seem quite that bad. The party would undoubtedly be torture, but at least with Scott by her side she’d have some moral support. ‘I reckon if you’re with me I can probably – maybe – just about – get through this party and whatever Mum and Dad’s announcement is. And it would be nice to get out of London for the weekend. But what about Ravi?’

She didn’t want Scott’s boyfriend, a completely gorgeous hipster who worked for one of the posh concessions in Selfridges, to be left out.

‘He won’t mind. He’ll be working anyway.’

Nora nodded and threaded her arm through Scott’s. ‘Go on then, we might as well try and make the best of it. You supply the gin, and I’ll bring the facemasks.’

‘No way,’ he said, holding up his hand to stop her. ‘The last one you brought was so cheap it nearly took my skin off. I’ll get the facemasks and some goodies, and you can buy the gin.’

‘Okay, but I’m picking the car we hire.’

‘As long as it’s a convertible, darling, I don’t mind at all.’

Chapter 2

A couple of days later, Nora pulled on the handbrake and exited the car outside their home for the weekend. ‘Here we are then.’

The white-washed cottage sat right near the harbour with a view over the myriad small fishing boats moored up for the day. The front door and wooden shutters were painted sage green and underneath the ground floor windows, iron baskets attached to the wall flowered with brightly coloured pansies. Nora couldn’t wait to step inside and have a real look around. She’d gone to school with Rob, the owner, and knew he had a number of properties he rented out. Thankfully, this one hadn’t already been booked and he’d let her have it at mates-rates even though it had only recently been refurbished and they hadn’t seen each other in years. Having seen some of the pictures of other properties he’d worked on, her hopes were high for luxury.

‘I can’t believe you made me travel all the way in that,’ said Scott, climbing out of the passenger side and pointing to the dull blue three-door hatchback which was definitely not as luxurious as the convertible he’d hoped for. ‘I’d imagined my hair blowing in the wind like some vintage diva as we sped along.’

‘Well,’ Nora began, eking out the word. ‘Turns out, convertibles are actually quite expensive. This was more in my budget.’

‘Definitely not the height of elegance. So much for travelling in style.’

She pushed her dark hair back from her face. It was freshly washed and full of life, and as they’d pulled into Little Harbour, she’d opened her window and let the wind blow through it. It wasn’t quite the head-scarfed Marilyn Monroe Scott had been going for, but it was fine for her. ‘No, but we did travel at a very economical rate to the gallon.’

Despite the idea of seeing her family, Nora was excited at the idea of returning to Little Harbour. She loved long walks along the harbour arm, watching the fishing boats come in or go out, and of course, there was the chance to visit her favourite bookshop. There was something enchanting about being surrounded by books. Not only did they provide a shield against the world, but they also offered escape. The endless possibility of a story was simply magical.

Scott pulled her old, battered suitcase from the back seat, harrumphing at its weight. ‘How many books have you brought with you. Nor?’

‘Only one or two,’ she replied shiftily. Scott put it on the ground and crossed his arms over his chest.

‘And your Kindle?’

‘Maybe.’

‘And how many books have you loaded onto it?’

‘About seven.’ He raised one eyebrow. ‘Okay, I’ve got a couple of paperbacks in my handbag as well.’ She held one up to show him.

‘Good God, woman. For a two-day mini break?’

‘Don’t worry, I’ll still find time to talk to you.’

Nora knocked on the door and stepped back down from the old worn step that led up to it. Rob had said he’d meet them there at twelve knowing Nora wanted to check in as soon as possible. They’d made good time on the journey, and she’d particularly enjoyed Scott’s gasp when the sweet little town appeared on the horizon.

Winding through the tiny streets had filled Nora with a sense of security she hadn’t expected. They’d driven down the boulevards with their tree-lined walkways, in between roads of white pavilion-style houses, then on past the harbour to the tiny side streets of fisherman’s cottages. Having lived in London for so long, she’d assumed this weekend would feel more like a holiday, but the familiarity of seeing these places had been like a warm hug, as long as she pushed the idea of the party, and Alex, to the back of her mind.

Once Nora had confirmed her attendance via text message, there’d been no further communication with her mother. No enquiry as to where she was staying or when she’d be arriving, just confirmation of the venue and start time. Scott had found it all mind-boggling given that his family get togethers were raucous affairs that went on for days, but Nora’s family just didn’t work that way.

Growing up, her family had felt like the same as any other, but as she’d hit her teenage years and become more aware of how other families worked, she’d realised the problems in hers weren’t normal. Every family had tiffs and arguments, but her older sister Kathryn, had always been an angry figure stomping about in her life, and her dad was forever going off with other women, coming back when it mysteriously hadn’t worked out. Nora knew why it hadn’t worked out. Her father was the sort who wanted his cake and to eat it too. A grass-is-always-greener type of man. She was happy to use clichés to describe him because he was a cliché himself. Every time he left, her mum would turn in on herself and stop communicating, leaving Kathryn in charge of Nora. She’d do nothing but watch television when she was in one of her doldrums and the girls would be left to make their own meals, iron their own clothes for school and generally make their own way in life.

The door swung open, shocking Nora out of her glum reminiscence, to see Rob, older and slightly weathered, but much the same as he had been at school. ‘Nora, come in, come in. It’s so good to see you.’

He stood to the side and Nora and Scott walked in. The front door opened straight into a sweet, bright living room with lots of seaside regalia. A clock in the shape of a lighthouse sat above the wood-burner nestled in a large stone fireplace, nautical cushions adorned the sofa, and everything was bright white with blue or navy accents. ‘Hi Rob, it’s good to see you.’

Unsure whether a hug or kiss on the cheek was in order – either seemed far to affectionate given that they hadn’t spoken in years – Nora held out her hand. As Rob gave it a shake, the sound of a baby crying in the kitchen made her peer over his shoulder. Becky Tyldesley from school stood holding a baby. She’d been the closest thing to a best friend Nora had had during those ever-difficult teenage years, but as with so many school friends, different universities and diverging life paths had sent them into the world on separate journeys.

‘Becky? God, you look exactly the same.’ Her skin was glowing and though her blonde hair was pulled back in a ponytail, it was thick and bouncy.

‘Hardly, but thanks.’ The baby began to cry again, and Becky shushed him, bouncing him on her hip.

‘What are you doing here?’ Nora asked.

Becky laughed. ‘Rob and I own this place.’

‘You guys are together?’ She looked between them as a vague memory forced its way into her mind. She and Becky, both aged fifteen, sat on the harbour wall, legs dangling, sharing a bottle of cola and discussing the boys from school they’d happily date if asked. Rob hadn’t been one of those boys. He was far too geeky with glasses, braces, and a fuzzy upper lip. How could they have ended up together? ‘Wow. Congratulations.’

‘We’ve been married for six years,’ Becky said with a giggle. ‘But thanks. Is this your—’

‘Just a friend,’ Nora said, only her voice had grown incredibly loud, and it echoed around the front room. She hadn’t meant to blast it out like a lunatic. As it was the first time she’d returned, she just didn’t want the gossip mill going already. ‘This is Scott. Scott this is Rob and Becky.’

Scott gave a smile that lit his handsome face, and he held out his hand. ‘Nice to meet you both.’

‘Let me show you around,’ said Rob. ‘Then we’ll leave you to it.’

The tour didn’t take long, but every room was exquisite, and she and Scott passed through making happy noises and exchanging impressed glances. The two bedrooms held white metal-framed double beds with sky-blue bedding and curtains. Each bed had more scatter cushions than Nora knew what to do with and again there were nautical ornaments dotted around: a mini lighthouse on the windowsill and a green glass bowl with a selection of sea glass sat on top of the chest of drawers. When Scott saw the roll-topped bath, Nora thought he might jump straight in regardless of the fact they had company, and he was fully clothed. Everything was white and gleaming and spacious; worlds away from the boxroom she currently lived in. The seaside touches could have been overpowering, but Nora loved them; the rope banister down the winding staircase, the seashells arranged artfully in alcoves, the anchor motif bathroom furniture. It all added to the charm and Nora realised how much she’d missed living by the sea.

‘I think I could live here for the rest of my life,’ she said, the words coming unbidden out of her mouth.

Was that how she really felt? It was a surprising observation, given that she’d always repressed the thought of returning and refused nearly every chance to do so. Though it had never been the beauty of the town that had kept her away and there hadn’t been many chances to come back, only a ten-year high school reunion she had no interest in, and a quick dash home for Muriel’s funeral. Nora had worked at the bookshop with her every weekend and all summer long since she was sixteen until she went to university, and it was the only place, and people, she’d missed when she moved to London. Being in the cottage with the sound of the sea in the distance and the sunlight shining in through the windows, Little Harbour felt so different from the town she remembered.

‘Don’t say that,’ said Rob, ‘I’d be tempted to make you an offer.’

‘Are you looking to sell the place?’ asked Scott. ‘I can’t imagine it would hang around for long. You’ve done such an amazing job.’

‘We were, but the markets not great right now and with little Toby having proved a bit of a handful since he arrived, we just haven’t got round to putting it on the market.’

Seeing Becky and Rob glance towards their baby boy in concern, apprehension darted through her. Toby looked like every other pink cheeked, gurgling baby Nora had ever seen. ‘Is everything okay with your little one?’

‘He’s fine,’ Becky said, holding his chubby face in her hand. ‘We just didn’t realise quite how tiring it was going to be, and he had a few coughs and colds, so it was a bit of a struggle. He’s right as rain now,’ she added cheerily. ‘Anyway, we better get out of your hair and let you settle in.’ As Becky walked past, with one hand she grabbed a piece of paper and pen from a small table near the front door and wrote down her number. ‘It’d be fab to keep in touch if you fancy it?’ She handed the piece of paper to Nora with a sadness in her eyes that made Nora’s heart clench.

‘I’d love to,’ she replied, and to her surprise, found that she really meant it. They’d always had fun together and maybe it was time to get back in touch with a few people from her past.

Rob and Becky left, and Scott flopped onto the comfortable-looking sofa, wriggling to get himself in just the right position. He pulled out a pillow from under his leg and placed it behind his head. ‘This place is gorgeous.’

‘I know. We’ve really hit the jackpot here. Everything is virtually brand new—’

‘And that bathroom! Ah, divine. Beats our tiny shower, doesn’t it? Would it be incredibly self-indulgent if I had a bath at midday on a Friday, just because I can?’

‘Completely,’ Nora replied with a giggle. ‘But that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t. Why don’t you do that, and I’ll nip out and get some supplies?’

‘Are you sure?’ asked Scott, his smooth brow creasing. ‘You did all the driving. If we’re divvying up chores, I should be the one to go out while you relax.’

‘No, it’s fine, honestly. I quite fancy popping into my favourite bookshop, and I can get the supplies on my way back.’

Truth be told, Nora had been itching to go to The Book Nook and see how Abe was doing. A wave of guilt hit her that she hadn’t kept in contact with him, especially since Muriel’s passing. They’d had the type of marriage most people dream of: soul mates who’d met when they were young and lived happily-ever-after until she was taken from him far too soon. Life was a bitch, that was for sure.

‘Right,’ said Nora, shaking off the guilt as much as possible, though it still tinged her thoughts. ‘I’m off. Enjoy your bath, layabout.’

‘I will,’ Scott replied. But before Nora had even taken the keys from the large shell being used as key-holder by the front door, Scott was halfway up the small winding staircase, taking them two a time.

Chapter 3

The town of Little Harbour had changed a lot over Nora’s absence.

Gone were the cafés with Formica tables and laminated menus complete with unappetising pictures, and in their place were modern, trendy spots with glass extensions and steel girders. A few of the old fisherman’s pubs remained, dark and dated where the fisherman stopped for a midday pint after being up and working since the crack of dawn. Down in the harbour, the boats bobbed in the little marina where seaweed and netting swam on the surface, and across the other side, the harbour arm reached out into the sea. A long time ago, it had been the last goodbye of servicemen off to France and the horrors of World War One, but now it held micro-pubs, champagne bars and tiny seafood restaurants.

The town itself no longer possessed the swathes of charity shops and high-street chains it had in her youth. Hairdressers, beauty salons and estate agents dominated and between them were more cafés, alongside artisan bakers and butchers. Looking around, Nora could barely believe it. The streets that had been dotted with chewing gum like a Lichtenstein painting were clean and dazzling in the sun, and the ghost town was now full of shoppers bustling here and there.

Turning down Smugglers Lane – one of the tiny streets that ran off the main high street and back towards the sea front – she saw The Book Nook nestled at the end of the street. It was already busy with people staring in the various shop windows, eyeing up what to buy. It had always been one of the nicer streets in Little Harbour. Every shopkeeper kept their business spick and span, and pots of flowers lined the way down. The shops were eclectic but some of the best in town. There was a tiny haberdasher’s, a butcher that was so small it was surprising it made enough money to survive, and a boutique dress shop. The bakery she’d gazed longingly through the window at every lunchtime when working in the bookshop, was still there and as she paused at it again, her feet halting unconsciously on the cobbles, Nora’s mouth watered at the array of treats before her. Sweet pastries covered with chocolate, cream or fruit stood in rows on one side of the window, while on the other, savoury quiches and pies, lined up in all their shiny, carb-filled glory.

A face she instantly recognised smiled through the glass at her. It was Lou, the lady who owned the bakery. She waved and beckoned her inside. ‘Nora Bell? Whatever are you doing back?’ Her cheeks were a chubby, ruddy pink and her grey hair had been pulled back underneath a little white straw hat. They hadn’t had that uniform when Nora had last been here.

‘I’m back for the weekend. Mum and Dad are having a party for his sixtieth.’

‘Oh, yes, we’ve heard all about this mysterious announcement of theirs. Quite the talk of the town.’ Nora felt a flush up the back of her neck. ‘Isn’t it, Claire? Every day we’ve had people in here wondering what it’s going to be.’

Claire was Lou’s daughter and had been at school with Nora.

‘Hi Claire,’ Nora said cheerfully.

‘Nice to see you back.’

‘Our Claire’s a fully qualified baker now. Aren’t you? Went to catering college and everything, didn’t you, darling?’

Poor Claire’s cheeks turned bright pink. She’d always been terribly shy. She turned side on to her mum to re-stock some freshly baked loaves, but Nora spotted the eye roll.

‘And she’s even done courses in France.’

‘That’s amazing, Claire. Anyway, it’s nice to see you both.’ Nora made for the door.

‘Can’t we tempt you with anything?’ asked Lou, motioning at the array of food.

‘No, that’s okay, thanks, but I might grab something on my way back. I’m just off to see Abe and the bookshop.’

‘Bye then, dear. Nice to see you.’

Nora carried on to the end of the road, but as she stopped outside The Book Nook and gazed in the window, her brow furrowed. Scraps of paint peeled from the windowsill and the window itself was almost blacked-out with grime. What had happened to the place? In her memory, the paintwork sparkled, and a warm glow emanated from inside, reflecting how welcoming it was. Standing behind the till on her Saturday’s, Nora would watch the tiny, cobbled street outside dreaming of Mr Rochester or Mr Darcy. She’d preferred that spot because she could watch out for Alex who always came in the front door when the shop was open. He loved books as much as she did, but having a lot more friends than her, was out most Saturday’s, only pulling up on his bike when he finally came home for lunch or dinner. He’d waltz in with his dark brown hair hanging into his blue eyes lined with thick black lashes. Muriel would fuss about him while Abe chatted to the customers matching them with a book they didn’t always know they needed. Sometimes, in the summer holidays when time felt endless, he’d work with his dad on the bespoke book-finding service they ran, and Nora would get to see some more of him.

There’d been rare occasions when she and Alex had worked together on projects, researching possible first editions and rare-book sites, finding exactly what the client wanted. That was how they’d first really got to know each other, and it was during one late night search when she was 16 that they shared their first kiss. It had in fact, been Nora’s first ever kiss and absolutely perfect, framed by the light of an enormous computer screen and the lamplight flooding in through the side window. Yet their first attempt at romance hadn’t lasted long. Either she wasn’t very good at kissing, or neither of them really knew how to behave after such a monumental event and within a week they had returned to awkward glances and stuttered conversation.

Then things had changed when school finished forever, and summer arrived. He’d nervously asked her on a date – a proper date to the local cinema – and soon they were using terms like boyfriend and girlfriend. All through college they’d been an item. Young, free and in love and with a world full of endless possibilities scattered before them. But then they’d gone to separate universities and despite his promises to stay in touch, she’d heard nothing from him. While all the other freshers were enjoying themselves, she’d spent her time alone in her tiny bedroom in halls, crying. Eventually, studying, new friends and parties every night had taken over and as she never went home unless she had too, she hadn’t seen him since. She treasured the memories of that summer romance and, despite the way he’d torn her heart out, Alex had laid the foundations for her measure of men. He’d been a kind, sweet, attentive boyfriend, setting the bar so high, it was no wonder the city flings hadn’t lived up to those standards.

Nora shook thoughts of Alex away. Most of the shops in these small narrow side streets were so small it was almost impossible to imagine any of them making a profit unless they did everything online, but The Book Nook held a coveted spot on the corner with a lot more room. She was sure that more than one offer must have come Abe’s way over the years, though he had never sold, but the current state of the place was worrying. A small, dog-eared sign on the door said ‘Open’ and she pushed the door to.

It creaked on its hinges causing Abe, significantly aged and drawn, to perch on the edge of his large armchair near the side window with a view out over the harbour. ‘Nora? Is that you? Nora Bell?’

‘Hi, Abe.’ Nora edged a little further into the darkened room. Nerves tightened her stomach at how different the shop was.

The air was thick with dust and particles sparkled when caught by the few shards of light desperately forcing their way into the gloom. It was as if Abe had replaced all the lightbulbs with the wrong wattage. The dark wooden bookshelves that lined all the walls sucked in any hint of brightness and the myriad sized books were covered in a film of grime. The tables that dotted the musty old carpet all the way over to Abe’s armchair by the huge harbour-side window were equally as dirty. The wholesome, warm atmosphere had vanished, and a sadness seemed to have settled on everything. Even his prized collection of telescopes that lined the top of each shelf were dotted with cobwebs. Everything was exactly how it had been all those years ago except dirtier.

‘Wow, this place is—’ She looked around, unable to describe it. ‘Gosh. How are you, Abe?’

‘Goodness me, Nora Bell.’ Slowly, Abe pushed himself to standing as if his bones were heavy and arthritic. ‘Come here then and let me see you properly. The eyesight’s not what it was.’ She noted the absence of glasses and made a mental note to encourage him to the opticians. ‘What are you doing back? I haven’t seen you since…’ Pain flashed across his features, and he was unable to finish the sentence. Nora stepped in.

‘I’m back for a family party – Dad’s sixtieth – it’s tomorrow night, so a friend and I thought we’d make a weekend of it.’

‘Well, that’s lovely. I never thought I’d see the day you’d come home voluntarily. I thought we’d have to pull you back by the scruff of your neck.’ Abe shuffled over and wrapped her in a hug.

Suffice it to say, Nora’s family weren’t huggers. Her parents had given a cursory shoulder squeeze the day she left for university and apart from that, all her dad did in emotional moments was a nod of the head and a weak smile. Both Abe and Muriel had been happy to show affection, and Nora had always enjoyed the feel of their arms around her, of true care that had been lacking with her own family.

‘Aren’t you as pretty as a picture. I didn’t get chance to tell you last time I saw you, but I was pleased you came. Muriel would have been glad of it too.’ He swallowed hard then shuffled to the shop counter and leaned on it. He could only be in his sixties, but he was acting as if he was ancient. At the end she could see a huge workstation where his computer sat for searching for rare and antique books, but how much of that was being done at the moment? ‘Come to buy a book, have you? A little gift for yourself to take home?’

This flash of the old Abe was heart-warming. It was good to know he was still there underneath the surface. Maybe she should offer to give the shop a good clean before she left, though she probably wouldn’t have time. Did Alex know the place was like this? Surely he couldn’t or he’d be here helping. Maybe she could look him up and let him know? The idea of speaking to him again sent a flutter through her. She could only imagine him growing more handsome with age. She glanced around. ‘I couldn’t come all the way and not buy a book from my favourite bookshop, could I? What have you got I’d like?

‘Oh, there’s some lovely Daphne du Maurier’s in the corner.’

‘Funny you should say that. I’m just re-reading Rebecca.’

‘Again?’ He laughed. ‘How many times is that?’

‘I’ve lost count.’ A slight twinkle had come into Abe’s eye as they spoke about books, but Nora didn’t feel she could leave without asking a few more questions. Running her hand over one of the shelves and pretending she didn’t mind that her fingers were now damp and covered in dust, she said, ‘I’ve really missed this place. This feels more like home than my actual home. So, how are things’

‘I mustn’t grumble, I suppose.’ Thick eyebrows, grey and wiry, closed together. ‘Obviously, I miss her, but you have to just get on, don’t you?’

It didn’t seem like he was getting on at all.

‘How’re sales?’ When she’d worked there it had been the busiest shop in town, and though that was a long time ago, the day she’d come back for the funeral the place hadn’t looked like this.

‘Not so great these days. As you can see—’ He cast a hand around. ‘I’m not as busy as I was. It’s getting harder and harder to pay the rates.’

‘I’m sure it’ll perk up,’ she offered reassuringly, even though deep down she was unconvinced. The sadness that sat heavy in the atmosphere permeated her skin. She didn’t want this place to close and disappear. The world needed more bookshops as far as she was concerned but there wasn’t really anything she could do to help. She couldn’t just turn up and make suggestions then bugger off to London again. It would be like walking in, criticising everything, then leaving; patronising in the extreme. She’d not upset Abe like that, it was unthinkable. And Abe knew how to run a business, he’d been doing it for years. It just seemed he didn’t want too anymore.

Abe’s eyes dropped to the countertop. ‘I think these are the last days of The Book Nook.’

Nora spun to face him. ‘What? No! It can’t be.’ She hadn’t thought things would be that bad. ‘This place can’t close. It’s the only bookshop in town.’

‘Sign of the times, I think,’ Abe replied with a shrug. He was a bit too skinny for Nora’s liking too, she noticed. Before, he’d always been stocky, but it was clear he wasn’t looking after himself.

‘There must be something we can do? Maybe…’ She trailed away, trying to find some suggestions that wouldn’t make Abe feel worse. ‘What about some discounts? Or two-for-one offers or something?’

‘I don’t think so, my girl.’ He heaved a great sigh. ‘It’s just one of those inevitable things, better to just accept it and enjoy the place while we can.’

Nora’s heart broke on the spot. The pain and desperate complacency in his voice echoed around the room. ‘What does Alex say?’

Abe began fiddling with the pen and notepad on the counter. ‘Not much. He pops down now and again and calls sometimes, but he has his own life now.’

‘I suppose he does.’ And so did she, but why did that make her feel guilty? Deep down, she knew she should have kept in touch with Abe more, especially since Muriel died. She’d just assumed Alex would be doing it and, in her haste to keep away from Little Harbour, had convinced herself it wasn’t her place. ‘What will you do if you close?’

‘Garden, maybe? It’s a right state out the back there.’ He signalled to the rear of the shop. ‘Fish? I used to go fishing with Alex when he was a little boy. I could start that again. Or I’ll just downsize.’ The words seemed to hurt as he said them, and something told her not the press the matter.

‘After I’ve found a book, I’m off to get some shopping. Do you want me to get you anything? Have you had lunch?’

Abe shook his head, his thatch of unkempt grey hair ruffling. ‘I don’t really bother with lunch these days. I think losing my appetite is a sign of getting old.’

It was definitely a sign of grief, and she was pretty sure that was the root of all the problems in this shop right now. As close as they’d been, she didn’t want to charge in, though she couldn’t in all good conscience do nothing. ‘Shall I get you a sandwich and drop it back?’

‘Oh, don’t go out of your way for me. Now, there must be a book in this shop that needs you to take it home.’

‘Probably.’ She grinned. ‘Though I haven’t got room for many more in my tiny bedroom. I live with my friend Scott in Shoreditch. How’s Alex?’ Grateful he couldn’t see her face and read the pain talking of Alex always brought with it, she wandered around hoping her voice hadn’t betrayed how much she wanted to know.

‘He lives in York and pops down sometimes.’

Was it her imagination, or was there a slight bitterness in Abe’s tone? Her hand landed on a copy of Jamaica Inn. She pulled it out and ran her fingertips over the cover. Underneath the dust there was a beautiful book waiting to be discovered; a new world ready to open up to someone. That was the power of books, the wonderful thing about them. Though she still loved reading she’d forgotten that, too wrapped up in her own life to really think about it. She was so busy reading to escape she’d forgotten how powerful that notion was. Nora pulled out the copy and tucked it in the crook of her elbow before continuing to browse. York was a long way away. It might explain why the place had got so bad. It wasn’t as if Alex could just pop in from around the corner. She’d never thought he’d end up so far. She’d assumed he was still living in town when she attended the funeral.

‘He’s a copywriter. Tinkering with words in his own way.’ Again, there was that hint of bitterness but also pride.

‘You must be really proud of him.’ She grabbed a copy of Middlemarch and went to pay. After squinting at the prices, and ringing them through the ancient till, Abe looked up. He really needed to get a state-of-the-art computer thing installed if he was ever to keep going. Did he even take card payments? She’d have expected Alex to help with these things. Why wasn’t he? He loaded them into an old supermarket carrier bag and handed it over. ‘Thanks, Abe. I’m going to drop you in a sandwich in a bit and I want you to eat it, okay? No excuses.’

‘All right. All right.’ He waved his hands at her dismissively.

‘And a cake. You should definitely have a nice cake too.’

‘Okay, bossy-boots.’ A slight flash of spirit came to his eyes then faded. ‘Enjoy your party tomorrow night. Hope it goes well.’

‘So do I,’ she replied with a sigh. ‘But we both know it probably won’t.’

‘Never say never.’

She kissed him on the cheek and said goodbye.

Nora grabbed the supplies for her and Scott and a sandwich and cake for Abe and dropped into the shop before returning to the cottage. When she arrived back, she tossed her keys into the shell as if she’d been doing it forever. Scott was relaxing in the long back garden. Tall trees and thick bushes made it seem a magical, faraway land and spring flowers were beginning to bloom. It was a little chilly, but the air was far too fresh to sit indoors as they’d have to in London. It carried a slight tang from the sea, and you could sling a blanket over your legs if you got too cold. At a small green metal table for four, Scott had his feet up, shades on and headphones in. She put the shopping away without disturbing him and joined him with a bottle of wine she’d got from the chiller cabinet of a specialist wine seller just down from Lou’s bakery.

‘Have you been here since your bath?’ she asked after tapping him on the shoulder.

He unhooked his headphones. ‘Yep. It’s the best bath I’ve ever been in. I felt like a king in there. It was just gorgeous, and they’d even supplied little bottles of bath stuff and shampoo. Isn’t this lovely, Nora? Look at that garden, and down the end there’s a hidden stone bench.’

‘Sounds fab.’

‘How was your shopping trip?’ he asked, pulling his sunglasses down the bridge of his nose and looking over the top. ‘You were ages.’

Nora popped the cork from the bottle and poured two glasses. ‘I had a wander around town and nipped into that bookshop I told you about. The one I used to work in.’

‘Bad was it?’

‘Why do you say that?’

‘Because although we’re known for quite hefty measures, that isn’t one glass of wine, it’s three.’ She straightened the bottle, eyeing how much was left. She’d better sip it or she’d be drunk by dinner time. ‘Either you’re developing a problem, something’s wrong, or I need to buy you an actual measuring thingy for Christmas.’

‘If you buy me a measuring thingy, I’ll use it to remove your testicles.’

Scott took his glass and drank. ‘That’s delicious. So what’s up? You don’t look as relaxed as when we first arrived. Is it the party?’

She shook her head. ‘No, it’s Abe and the bookshop. It’s really gone downhill, and it just feels so sad. It used to be amazing, so full of life and love and just the most perfect place in the world. Now it’s dark and dusty and filled with sadness. Abe’s lost weight and he looks older than his years.’

‘He probably is quite old though, isn’t he?

‘He can’t be much older than my dad, in fact I think he might be a year or two younger. He shouldn’t look as ancient as he does. I know it’s grief. The Book Nook’s only gone downhill since Muriel died. Do you remember I came home for the funeral? What can I do to help him?’

Scott pushed his glasses back on. ‘Nothing, darling, I’m afraid. You could maybe call or pop down a bit more often, but he’s not your responsibility and you can’t go sticking your nose into other people’s lives without asking. They don’t thank you for it.’

Nora flopped back in her chair. ‘I know, but I feel so awful just walking away when things are clearly going bad for the shop and for Abe. I got the impression Alex wasn’t around much and I think Abe’s lonely.’

‘And this is Alex who broke your heart?’

‘Yeah.’ She took a drink, again pretending she was fine and ignoring the roiling emotions inside her. ‘The shop will be closed soon if we don’t do something. Then what will Abe do. Without the business I can just see him becoming a weird fishing, gardening hermit.’

Scott titled his head. ‘A what now?’

‘A weird fishing, gardening hermit.’

‘Right,’ he said it slowly, eyeing her as if she’d gone mad. ‘Honey, it’s not your place to do anything for the bookshop. Has he asked you for help?’

Nora dropped her eyes to her wine. Abe hadn’t and he hadn’t seemed overly bothered when he said the place would probably close. Yes, he’d been sad, but the business had been his life, so of course he was sad. But was he really that nonchalant about it? Underneath it all, Nora couldn’t believe the business he and Muriel had built from scratch – that he had always loved so passionately – could be discarded without a fight. And it still felt awful for her to sit and do nothing. Perhaps she could call in again tomorrow or Sunday and drop a few things into conversation? It had to be worth a shot. The part of her brain that used to shout at her to stay away from here told her she was getting too involved. The prospect of the party played on her mind as the hour drew closer and her family always made her hypersensitive. Maybe she was just worrying about Abe in an effort to avoid worrying about her family.

Scott’s voice softened. ‘Come on, you’ve got enough on your plate right now. Let’s just chill out and enjoy this weekend before heading home. I mean, listen to that—’ He pointed a finger in the air.

‘What? I can’t hear anything.’

‘Exactly! No traffic, no sirens. Just peace and quiet. Let’s have these and get our facemasks on. There’s a DVD player and I brought our favourite romcom. A half-naked Captain America is just what we need.’

He was right. A half-naked Captain America was just what she needed right now because however much it wasn’t her business, the fate of The Book Nook seemed incredibly important to her.

Chapter 4

As the early morning light penetrated the slats in the blind, masking the unappealing view from his study window, Alex toyed with his pen. Holding it between his forefinger and thumb, he flicked it back and forth while staring at a tube of toothpaste. As no words came, he put down the pen and picked up the small plastic tube, turning it over, flipping open the top and sniffing it, then reading the back before finally putting it down again. He scratched the back of his neck, conscious that his dark brown hair was beginning to grey at the temples. He checked the top of his head to see if he was going bald. Thankfully not.

The trouble with being a copywriter was you sometimes had to write copy for things that were incredibly hard to write copy for. What could be said about toothpaste that hadn’t been said a million times? It was minty, it cleaned your teeth, if you were lucky, it wasn’t so strong tasting you couldn’t eat your breakfast for an hour. It was just one of those things you had to do. That was about it. He made a note of these points on the A4 pad on his desk. Not that they were particularly helpful, but the blank page had been staring at him for half an hour already and it felt good to finally write on the great expanse of white. Somehow, he had to get a sentence out of that. He tossed the pen down onto the desk. Coffee.

Trudging downstairs, still in his navy dressing gown, he went through to the kitchen and flicked on the kettle. His new little flat felt eerily quiet. He was used to a house with all manner of noises; the hum of the heating, the hiss of the stove-top kettle, the whirring of the washing machine. That house would also have rung with raised voices and arguments. The silence that now surrounded him seemed to both suck in all sound and yet, amplify silence at the same time. It took some getting used to. Padding around in his slippers he opened a cupboard door and pulled out a mug before heaping teaspoons of instant coffee into it. It was odd that he missed the small things like making tea for someone else, grabbing them a chocolate from the fridge because you were the one getting up. They were all things he'd taken for granted but they were the tiny details that made a relationship real. That bonded people together and showed you cared.

When he and Cassie had split three months ago, he’d promised himself that with all this free time he was going to actually write the novel that had bubbled away in his brain for the last decade. He’d scribbled notes here and there when odd thoughts had come to him: lines of dialogue, scenes he could picture in his head, flawed character traits for his hero. Bits of paper poked out of the tattered notebook he’d kept for the last ten years but not a single word had been written of an actual manuscript. He’d decided a long time ago he wanted to write something gritty and Noirish, something that conjured up PI’s like Sam Spade and Philip Marlowe and seductive femme fatale’s like those played by Lauren Becall. So often he’d be able to picture everything in his head, but by the time he sat down to type, he couldn’t quite turn the pictures into words, let alone sentences.

Instead, he found that every time he sat at his laptop, the blank page filled him with an acute sense of dread and the inevitability of failure, that his fingers didn’t move. Over the last month, he’d taken on more and more jobs, so he had to work every weekend as an excuse. It was just easier not to go near the Word document he’d imaginatively titled, Novel One, and pretend that he’d do it later.

Alex poured the boiling water into the cup and climbed up onto the stool at the breakfast bar. His relationship with Cassie had been a massive mistake. Not at first, of course, but when he thought back on all the events that had led them to where they were now, it was clear he’d consistently made the wrong choices. In time, he was sure she’d come to realise that too, though he regretted deeply the anger and hurt she was feeling now.

Outside the window of his lifeless shiny white kitchen, the six-foot high fence and the side of the house next to him gazed back. For a while now, a niggling longing for a trip home had been growing in his mind. As he stared at the tiny patch of grass that constituted his garden, that niggling grew into a tugging. His dad had been struggling since his mum’s death and Alex knew he wasn’t getting home as often as he should. He’d blamed the drive: it was a long way from York down to the most south-easterly point of the UK; and his workload. But he knew it was his own fear and shame holding him back.

If he was honest, he didn’t know how to help his dad. Alex had expected the grief to be difficult and heart-breaking, but his dad was such an active, practical man, he hadn’t imagined it would consume him so fully, leaving in its wake a sense of hopelessness and despondency that sprang the distance between them whenever they talked on the phone. The man his dad was becoming frightened him. Yet, when he thought about going home and helping, he couldn’t think of anything useful to say or do. He worried about saying the wrong thing. He worried that being there would remind his dad even more of their loss as conversation would inevitably turn to Alex’s mum. And Alex had made so many terrible decisions off the back of his grief, he wasn’t really in a position to impart any practical advice. Still, he knew it was time to shelve his excuses and visit.

Swigging the last of his coffee, Alex made his way back up to the study. He decided to procrastinate from writing about toothpaste a little longer by getting dressed, and if he was lucky, brushing his teeth might provide some inspiration for the advertising campaign for Snow White Brighter than the Brightest White Toothpaste. Maybe they could get someone dressed up as Snow White in front of a mirror brushing their teeth? That wasn’t a bad idea. He could tell the advertising team about it on Monday, though they were unlikely to get the go-ahead from Disney.

The York Minster bells chimed the hour and Alex decided to walk into the city. A stroll through Shambles market and a spot of breakfast would set him up for a day of writing. It might even provide the boost he needed to get the toothpaste copy sorted out before lunch. That would give him the afternoon to start on his novel. He might even call his dad and talk about a visit. The hopeful idea filled his chest with a light, bright feeling and he made his way out of the front door and into the city centre. If he was lucky today would be different.

The historic buildings were soon looming up around him as his feet hit the uneven cobbled streets. He’d loved York since coming to university here to read English and Philosophy. The English part had proven useful, the philosophy side, not so much. He stopped at one of the food stalls in Shambles market and ordered a bacon sandwich. It was already busy with all manner of traders here. Perching on a seat, he lifted his head to let the sun warm his face. Bringing his eyes back down from the clear blue sky, he paused before taking a bite of his sandwich. Cassie was strolling along with a group of her friends.

Alex swallowed hard as her eyes landed on him. She quickly looked away, she then turned back, and her mouth formed a small, firm line. She was very pretty, and it was that which had drawn him to her in the first place. He shouldn’t have been surprised at her scowl; it was all his fault. He’d rushed into things without really thinking, but she was clearly still furious.

The group of friends passed with Cassie keeping pace, then, almost as an afterthought, Cassie cast a glance back over her shoulder and tailed away from the group. The easy pace with which she’d entered the market was replaced by a march towards him. Tension mounted in his shoulders and Alex racked his brains, wondering what it was she wanted to speak to him about. The speed with which their relationship had transpired meant that they didn’t actually have many shared items, and he was sure he’d not taken anything of hers when he’d moved out. At least he’d manned up enough to end it properly, not like he had with Nora, his only other serious relationship. Slinking away into the shadows still haunted him and he’d been determined not to do that this time. It hadn’t stopped Cassie throwing pot plants at him. She came to a stop in front of him, her arms crossed over her chest.

‘Alex.’

He wiped his mouth using the scratchy napkin he’d been given with his sandwich. ‘Hi, Cass. Everything all right?

‘No, not really. But they’re not going to be, are they? Not for a long time.’

Unsure what else to say, Alex was tempted to take a bite of his sandwich but didn’t want to look callous. He cared that he’d hurt her and wished things had worked out differently, but he didn’t see the point of going over old ground and nor did he expect her to be anything other than upset. He felt truly guilty, but deep down he knew he’d done the right thing and in time, he hoped she would too. She was a lovely girl and would make someone incredibly happy one day, but that person wasn’t him.

‘Out for breakfast?’ he finally managed, glad to find something neutral to talk about.

Cassie rolled her eyes. ‘I want the lamp back you took with you. You know the one that was in the spare room? The one I got you that you didn’t really like—’

‘I did, I just—’

‘I know you didn’t, so you don’t have to pretend anymore.’ She made a sound that was halfway between a cough, a sigh and an incredulous laugh. What could you call it? A clough? Was it any wonder he wasn’t a novelist when he couldn’t think of simple words. Alex dropped his eyes to his sandwich and hoped he wasn’t going the same colour as the ketchup. Heat climbed up his neck and onto his cheeks and it had nothing to do with the bright March sun shining onto his face. ‘I’m going to come by and get it on Monday. You never liked it and I really did, so…’

‘Yeah, sure.’ He had liked the lamp – a bit. It wasn’t his favourite thing in the world, but he’d loved that she’d tried to find something he liked. He should have seen it as the warning sign it was – that they didn’t really know each other that well. ‘If that’s what you want.’

‘It is.’

With a quick turn she was gone, striding off towards her friends, leaving nothing but a whiff of her perfume. The few early morning diners around him didn’t make any comments, but he could tell they’d clocked the exchange. Ignoring their whispers, Alex ate the rest of his now cold bacon sandwich and decided on a rifle through the second-hand book stalls. Maybe even a trip round some of the bookshops. That always cheered him up. Having grown up surrounded by books he found them comforting. The smell, the feel of the paper between his fingertips, the joy to be found in the world between the pages. He loved reading on his tablet, but nothing replaced an actual solid book that you could hold in your fingers and turn the page as the story gripped you, speeding up as you raced to the end, eager to know what was going to happen. It was what had made him want to be a writer. He’d never confided that in anyone before, not even his dad. How could he when he couldn’t even get a sentence written down? But he so wanted to write a book that gripped people, making them stay up late, reading into the night, or miss their stop on the bus because they were so captivated by the characters they couldn’t put it down.

As usual when he thought of bookshops, Nora Bell came crashing into his mind. Yes, they’d been young but that was no excuse. He shouldn’t have just not bothered getting in touch when his new life beckoned. He’d thought about finding her and apologising for the way things had ended between them, but for all he knew, she’d forgotten about it by now. He’d look like a lunatic if he emailed her out of the blue to apologise for something she barely remembered. As he threw his rubbish into the bin, reality crashed in. Toothpaste was waiting for him.

He only needed to get one line down, he told himself. Something to start the ball rolling. It didn’t have to be the best line in the world, just something. Both the toothpaste copy and the novel writing felt like pulling teeth but at least one he was getting paid for.

Chapter 5

‘How do I look?’ asked Nora, turning around in the black sleeveless jumpsuit and heels she’d brought with her for the party. She’d left her long dark hair down so it could hang around her face and hide the embarrassment she was almost certainly going to feel at some point that evening.

‘You look fabulous,’ Scott replied after sipping his wine. ‘How do I look?’

Scott had put on a pair of dark denim skinny jeans and a floral shirt, buttoned all the way up to the collar. His blond hair was smoothed back, and he smelled divine. Scott always knew just how much aftershave to wear. He never overdid it so it lingered in the room, attacking the throats of anyone unfortunate enough to still be there after he left. ‘Will I do for your plus one?’

‘You look gorgeous, as usual.’

Nora took a deep breath and rolled her shoulders back. Since she’d woken up that morning her thoughts had battled between concern over Abe and whatever horror was about to befall her this evening. What did her parents have to say that they had to announce it so publicly, rather than telling their offspring quietly after gathering them together? And what was it going to be like seeing Kathryn again? Nora hadn’t spoken to her in such a long time. She and her sister sent the obligatory Christmas and birthday texts messages, marked with a few x’s, but that was it.

Another bolt of guilt shot through Nora. It wasn’t her fault they’d ended up this way, but it hurt, nonetheless. Even more so because it hadn’t always been like this for the Bell children. Growing up, despite Kathryn’s raging hormonal humps, they’d banded together, relying on each other to deal with their mum’s confidence struggles as their dad picked her up and put her down. He was always too busy with his own philandering ways to pay much attention to them. How their parent’s marriage had survived, Nora didn’t know, and she wasn’t entirely sure it should have. A part of her always thought things would have been a damn sight easier if her mum had left and taken them along. They could have healed together as a smaller, female-only family unit. Then maybe neither of them would have ended making stupid choices or becoming so jaded about life and men.

With Kathryn though, some things were hard to forgive. Nora shuddered at the memory of The Incident; the pain as real as the moment it had all happened. It was funny how she could talk about her parent’s marriage like it was some kind of sitcom complete with canned laughter, able to detach herself from those painful emotions or at least reconciled to them. But with Kathryn it was different. It still hurt. Maybe not quite as much as it once had, but enough to make her pause and hold her breath, forcing her brain not to replay the scene. Did it hurt more because as young kids they’d been as thick as thieves? Inseparable sisters. Up until The Incident, Nora had always thought they’d be the type of sisters you see in movies, turning to each other for advice and support, consoling the other with wine and ice-cream. Thank God she had Scott.

Scott’s hands gripped her shoulder’s firmly and gave her a mini massage. ‘It’s going to be fine. And if it’s not, I’ll start coughing and spluttering and you can rush me out of the room then we’ll high tail it back here and polish off the rest of the wine. I got an extra bottle when I explored the town today. It’s really pretty, isn’t it? And so many cute little shops.’

Nora took another big breath as she turned around to face him. ‘Why do I feel so nervous? Like I’m going for a job interview.’

‘It’s normal to feel like that. You haven’t seen any of them in the flesh for how long now?’

‘Two years? God, that sounds bad.’ She fiddled with the straps of her jumpsuit needing the confidence boost of a fabulous outfit.

‘Every family is different, Nor, don’t beat yourself up. I think considering how mental your lot are, you’ve turned out relatively sane.’

‘Thanks.’

‘Only relatively though. That thing you did the last time we went to that club was—’

‘Hey!’ She pointed a finger at him. ‘I told you never to speak of that again.’ She took a swig of her wine. She’d never gone into details over what happened with Kathryn, and it was her she feared seeing most. ‘If it all goes horribly wrong, we’ll run away, yeah?’ Scott nodded. ‘Okay. Let’s go.’

They left the cottage and walked to the harbour, taking a moment to enjoy the view out over the wide expanse of sea. The dark water shimmered under the light of a pale, grey moon, and the small fishing boats bobbed peacefully, moored up safely for the night. The cool spring air carried the chatter from groups strolling to restaurants and pubs, and bit at Nora’s bare arms under her cropped jacket. In the distance, over the other side of the marina, she could see the harbour arm. The great length of stone pier jutted out into the ink-black sea and lights from the swanky new bars twinkled all the way along. The breeze mounted as they walked on and Nora checked the name of the pub on her phone. After a few seconds she stopped.

‘It’s here.’

Scott studied the façade. ‘Oh my sweet siren of the sea.’

‘Yep,’ Nora replied. ‘This is it.’

‘Can’t we go to one of the places over there?’ He pointed to the lights and noise of the harbour arm. ‘I mean, is it even open? It’s so dark.’

Nora giggled at his response and the pained look on his face. Her mum and dad had chosen The Mermaid pub for their party. Clearly for Scott, the name had summoned an image of somewhere light and sweet, maybe somewhere like the cottage but with the addition of a bar, and significantly less snacks. Nora however knew differently. The Mermaid was one of the only pubs in Little Harbour that hadn’t been updated since around 1975. She knew because she’d checked it out online before they came down. Not that they had a website as such. She’d found them on a holiday ratings site which hadn’t been exactly complimentary. The façade was dark and dirty and had originally been painted a kind of sunshine yellow that over the years had changed to dirty tobacco brown. There was a painting of a mermaid in the corner of the name sign, but the poor girl had lived a very hard life, and her siren song was likely to be more of a 40-a-day croak than alluring aria. Extraordinarily little light penetrated through the large windows that faced onto the street and outside the pub. Where other places in town had hanging baskets and topiary, The Mermaid had two grizzled men puffing away on roll-ups.

Nora flashed them a disarming smile and she and Scott walked in, heading for the bar. Was it her imagination, or had everyone stopped talking? Scott stuck behind her like a human limpet, holding on to the belt of her jumpsuit as if he’d get lost. Given that he was six foot two and the only man wearing a shirt, let alone a floral one, it was unlikely.

A barmaid, of indeterminate age, finished serving her customer and leaned over the pumps. With her dyed black hair, she could have been anywhere from thirty to fifty. Seeing tiny lines form around her mouth as she blew a fake kiss to a customer for buying her a drink, Nora figured she was probably in her forties. ‘What can I get you, love?’

‘Hi, we’re here for the Bell party?’

‘You’re upstairs in the function room. Just carry on to the back of the pub and you’re on the top floor.’ Nora gave her thanks and started to step away. ‘Which of the Bells are you then?’

Though the question surprised her, she didn’t show it. ‘I’m Nora.’

The barmaid’s face soured. ‘You’re the one that left, aren’t you? We haven’t seen you around here for a while.’

‘Yes, I am,’ Nora replied, but wasn’t sure what else to add.

‘Don’t remember me, do you? I’m Kathryn’s friend Mel.’

‘Oh, right. Hi.’ The glower she got in return confused her. She didn’t really remember Mel and couldn’t figure out why she should be so hostile to her. Maybe she didn’t like the fact Nora and Kathryn had got away and she hadn’t, even though Kathryn had only made it to the next town over. Whatever it was, it was clearly her problem not Nora’s. She felt Scott’s reassuring hand on the small of her back, leading her away.

‘What was that?’ asked Scott as they began to climb the small staircase to the top floor. ‘Is no one allowed to leave here or something? That’s a bit weird, isn’t it?’

‘It’s quite an old-fashioned attitude. I doubt many people are still like it judging by the way the town has modernised.’

‘All except for this place, clearly.’

‘I don’t really remember her but if she’s a friend of Kathryn’s maybe Kathryn’s had a good old moan about me.’

The sound of seventies disco music grew louder, as did the thumping on the floor above. Every time someone landed a heavy step, the ceiling creaked. Nora hoped the dancefloor would last the night or they’d end up crashing down into the bar. Though to be honest, she had no intention of dancing. The plan was to listen to her mum and dad’s announcement and then leave as quickly as possible while not looking rude. They reached the final landing and the last few stairs. The music pumped louder, and Nora readied herself to see her family for the first time in years.

Sensing her apprehension, Scott took her hand. ‘Come on, Nora, we’re all dressed up, we might as well go in and eat some canapés, though I’m not sure what they’ll be like. I’m half expecting a cheese and pineapple hedgehog and a melting Viennetta. In fact, I’m quite hoping for a hedgehog; I love cheese and pineapple. It’s an underrated snack and hedgehog styling is a forgotten art if you ask me.’ Nora tried to smile but knew the corners of her mouth hadn’t lifted very high. ‘You can do this, Nor.’

Nora nodded to herself, letting Scott’s words of encouragement sink in , and took the last few steps into the room full of flashing, multi-coloured disco lights and, ironically, Gloria Gaynor’s I Will Survive.

At first, no one noticed their entrance which gave Nora time to look around. They stood at the back of the room, the dancefloor heaving with friends of her parents jiggling about and having a good time. One woman was sprightly hopping from foot-to-foot, while another spun around one way and then another in a jive. One side of the room was lined with food displayed on rickety tables and as Scott had hoped, there was a cheese and pineapple hedgehog.

In the furthest, darkest corner, Nora spied her sister, watching on in misery. Her two children, now three and four years old, were climbing over the chairs around them. Kathryn’s husband, Neil must have been at the bar or in the gents. Nora wondered whether to go over and say hello. The conversation would be short and sharp and purely obligatory. Was there much point? But she couldn’t leave without at least trying to say hello. That would only make their distant relationship worse. She made her way over as Scott offered to get the drinks and meet her at the table. No doubt he’d swing by the buffet too, she could do with some fortifying cheese.

Nora ran through a range of greetings trying to find the right one: hi, hello, yo, watcha. Internally, she rolled her eyes and decided to keep it simple. ‘Hey,’ Nora stopped next to Kathryn’s chair. She’d been busy telling off the kids so hadn’t noticed her approach.

‘Nora!’ Kathryn’s eyes widened in surprise. She obviously hadn’t expected her sister to come. It sent a trickle of annoyance up Nora’s spine.

Nora gave a strange wave which was more just a splaying of fingers like she had cramp. She’d never waved like that in her life. Why the hell had she decided to start now? ‘Yep. It’s me. In the flesh.’

‘I suppose we should be honoured to have you here. It’s such an enormous trek down from London.’ Kathryn rested a hand on the table. Nora noticed that her nail varnish was chipped and her manicure growing out. Working in the beauty industry, Kathryn had always prided herself on her appearance, but the woman before Nora was different – less polished. Worry balled in Nora’s stomach.

Letting the snide remark pass, she sat down, hoping Scott had ordered her an extra-large gin and tonic. ‘How are you, Kathryn?’

‘We’re fine,’ she replied, removing one of the children from around her neck and pulling the other off the back of a chair. ‘Go and dance with Grandad and let me talk to Aunty Nora.’ They headed off to the dance floor.

Nora inhaled a sharp breath at being called aunty. Being so detached from her sister, she’d never been that close to her niece and nephew and couldn’t help feeling she’d missed out. They were gorgeous, happy children. Ozzie had a little shirt and trousers combo while Avril was in a pretty sequin-covered dress. She sent presents on their birthdays and Kathryn would text back a short reply thanking her, but Nora hadn’t really thought about all that being an aunt really entailed. For a second, the separate ways they had lived their lives filled her with regret. Nora’s eyes followed the kids to see her dad, Dom, balder and rounder, taking the hands of his grandkids and spinning them around. He looked so different to the smooth-haired, smooth-tongued man who had darted in and out of their lives. These last few years had changed him more than she’d realised. He seemed less restless and more at peace with the family he had – the one he’d always had.

‘Are you going to sit down?’ asked Kathryn.

Nora felt like she was waiting to add ‘Or are you going to run away again?’ but when Kathryn didn’t, she took a seat.

The music changed to something by Elvis and Dom wiggled his hips causing her niece and nephew to collapse into giggles. ‘Dad looks happy.’

‘Any idea what this announcement is?’

‘None at all. You?’

‘Nope.’

Just then Scot arrived with their drinks. ‘Here you are, the largest gin and tonic I could have got and it still be drinkable.’

‘Thanks.’ She noticed Kathryn’s rather impressed expression. Nora sometimes forgot how handsome Scott was. He commanded attention almost everywhere he went, especially when he was suited and booted for work. Nora supposed she should introduce them. ‘Kathryn, this is my friend Scott. Where’s Neil?’ She hadn’t spotted Kathryn’s husband at the bar and if he was still in the toilet, he was taking a very long time.

‘He’s not here,’ Kathryn replied. She clearly didn’t want to talk about it and as they weren’t exactly the best of friends, Nora didn’t ask any more questions. One of the kids jumped on Kathryn’s lap, and she winced in pain.

‘Are you all right?’

‘I’m fine,’ she snapped. It wasn’t the most convincing reply as she absentmindedly rubbed her stomach, but Nora took the hint. ‘Not that you’d care.’

‘I do care,’ Nora said without thinking and it was like they were twelve years old again, arguing like real sisters do. ‘I really do,’ Nora added and reached out for Kathryn’s hand. She pulled it back. Despite the loud music, the atmosphere between them became silent and still.

Thankfully, Scott who was incredibly good at making small talk and as part of his job could diffuse difficult moments, saved the day. ‘Sorry, Kathryn, I should have asked if you’d like a drink.’

She studied him for a moment then turned away to watch the room. ‘No, thanks.’

Scott and Nora exchanged glances. Why had she even bothered? She should have known Kathryn wouldn’t want to see and talk to her. ‘I should find mum,’ Nora said. ‘I spotted Dad dancing, but I haven’t seen her yet.’

‘Want me to come with you?’ He leaned in further and whispered. ‘Please don’t leave me here. With her.’

‘Come on.’

As soon as she stood up, she spied her dad still on the dancefloor, and her mum had joined him. She gave a wide, joyful smile as she bopped alongside. The years had fallen away from her, and happiness radiated from her expression. Did she have a tan? She certainly looked more bronzed than usual and as it was only March, she couldn’t have got it from gardening. Nora studied her more closely, trying to picture her without the hue from the disco lights. She’d definitely been on the sunbeds. The rest of her face was dark except for the noticeably light skin around her eyes where you had to wear the protective goggles.

When her parents’ marriage had been going well, as it seemed to be at the moment, they were like an envied perfect couple, always laughing and cuddling. But the threat of Dom leaving had made her mum skittish. She didn’t seem like that now. What was going on? This was all so strange. Why couldn’t her family behave like any other family? Why couldn’t her family be at least a little bit normal?

The disco lights danced across the floor as her dad did some kind of wobbly spin on the spot. Her mum, Gill, looked up. ‘Nora!’ She left the throng and quickly made her way over, her dad catching up behind. ‘How long have you been here?’

‘Not long. You look nice, Mum.’

‘Who’s this handsome chap?’ Gill asked giving Scott the once over.

‘This is Scott, my friend.’

‘Friend, hey?’ said her dad, nudging his wife in the side. ‘Well, come and join the party, Scott.’

‘We’re making the announcement in a minute,’ her mum said excitedly. ‘I can’t wait.’

She was as giddy as a schoolgirl and the giggle that emerged was so high it made Nora jump. She wanted to ask where Kathryn’s husband was as he still hadn’t appeared, but if her sister found out, which she would because their mum couldn’t keep anything secret, she’d accuse Nora of sticking her nose in.

‘Right, off you go, Dom.’

Dom approached the DJ booth doing a cha-cha-cha move as he went and a second later all was quiet. He met Gill on the dancefloor, holding a microphone, and she threaded her arm through his. Together they stared out at the crowd gathering around them.

Nerves spiked in Nora’s stomach. She still had no idea what was going on or if the news was going to be good or bad. Scott took her hand and Nora squeezed it, receiving an appreciative look from her mum. At some point she’d have to drop into conversation that Scott was gay but right now wasn’t the time. Her dad had started speaking and she needed to concentrate on what he had to say. Nora tried to arrange her face into a neutral expression.

‘So,’ said Dom, pressing his hand into his wife’s waist. ‘We brought you all here tonight to have a little fun with us and so we can tell you something exciting that’s going on.’ Gill giggled and Nora shot Kathryn a glance. She could tell Kathryn was as perplexed as she was. She hadn’t moved from her spot, maybe because the kids were having fun in the corner and had made an assault course out of a few of the chairs. They really were gorgeous children. They had Kathryn’s light brown hair and large almond-shaped eyes.

‘As you know, it’s my sixtieth birthday tomorrow—’ A huge round of applause went around the place. Nora clapped along feeling strangely out of place. These people were happier for her dad’s sixtieth birthday than she was. If that wasn’t a sign that something had gone terribly wrong in her up-bringing, then nothing was. ‘So, we wanted to tell you that we’ve sold the house and are going on a year-long cruise around the world! And…wait for it…Calm down, Ken you look like you’re going to have a heart attack. We leave tomorrow!’

A moments silence was followed by deafening whoops and cheers as the news sank in. Nora glanced at Kathryn whose eyes were fiery with rage.

‘Wow,’ said Scott, leaning into her ear so he was heard above the din. ‘I wasn’t expecting that, were you? Your family are completely and utterly mental.’

Her parents had been swallowed up by the crowd and as they didn’t seem to be looking for their children – her mum was already dancing again and her dad had was walking away holding court with those around him – Nora said, ‘I think I better go and see if Kathryn’s all right. She looks about ready to blow. Can you grab some more drinks?’

Scott nodded. ‘Want something from the buffet? A cheesy pineapple? Pineappley cheese?’

Somehow Nora managed to laugh. ‘Load me up. I’ll need it to soak up another large gin.’ This whole thing was so absurd. She hadn’t been sure what to expect from her parents and this was as crazy as anything else they’d done. Why was she surprised? Kathryn had re-taken her seat, her shoulders slumped over. She looked tired and worn out and Nora resisted the urge to put her arm around her, sure that if she tried it would be shrugged off.

‘Did you know?’ asked Kathryn angrily. Nora was taken aback by the intensity of emotion that came through.

‘Me? No, I had no idea. Mum never texts me and I hardly ever speak to Dad. Did you know?’

‘Of course I didn’t. If I had, I wouldn’t have advised them to sell the house just to go on holiday.’ Kathryn suddenly ran out of steam and crumpled in her chair, like the anger had exhausted her. She was absentmindedly rubbing her stomach as her voice lost its harshness. ‘I mean, if they want to go on holiday, they should, but where are they going to live when they come back? They can’t live with me. Not in a…’ She let the sentence trail away, shaking her head.

‘Weren’t there any for sale signs or anything?’

Kathryn shook her head. ‘They must have sold privately. The house isn’t nice enough to be sold that quickly. And tomorrow? They’re leaving tomorrow?’

‘I know it’s crazy.’ Nora rubbed her forehead. She sat down again. ‘And will their marriage last through a cruise? Can you imagine what it’ll be like with the two of them in a tiny cabin, trapped on a ship – at sea – day in, day out.’

‘Who’ll kill who first?’ Kathryn said and a hint of a smile played around her mouth.

‘Definitely Mum would kill Dad. She’d nudge him over the side and make out he jumped.’ Nora laughed and was surprised when a quiet chuckle emerged from her sister.

‘Or everyone else will kill them and make out it was an argument.’

‘Like Murder on the Orient Express,’ Nora said excitedly. Kathryn’s brow creased in confusion. Unlike Nora, she wasn’t a big reader. ‘Never mind. But they’ll definitely be arguing after ten minutes of being on board. This is a really bad idea, isn’t it?’

Kathryn nodded. ‘Hang on, Mum’s coming over.’

Gill had left the crowd, but Dom still stood there, arms wide in mid-speech. Some of the guests were mumbling to each other and Nora felt the embarrassment warm her cheeks. They’d be the subject of town gossip in no time, but at least by then she’d be back in London and Kathryn would be out of Little Harbour.

‘What do you think then, girls?’

Seeing how delighted her mum was, Nora didn’t really know what to say. ‘A holiday will be good for you, Mum.’ Kathryn shot her a glance like she’d just betrayed her and she added, ‘But do you really need to sell the house to do it?’

‘Why didn’t you tell me, Mum?’ Kathryn said, standing up. She had to push herself out of her seat as if her back hurt. Something was definitely wrong with her, and it was more than just tiredness.

‘Oh, Kathryn, don’t go getting all miserable on me.’

‘Is it a private sale?’

‘Yes, but we got solicitors and everything, so it’ll be fine. And we deserve a holiday, don’t we? We’re the happiest we’ve been – well, ever, really – so why shouldn’t we do what we want? We could be dead tomorrow.’

‘Don’t say that, Mum,’ said Kathryn and Gill laid a hand on her daughter’s arm.

‘No, sorry. That was thoughtless.’ Nora’s gaze shifted between them. Thoughtless? Why was that thoughtless? What was going on with Kathryn? ‘But,’ her mum continued. ‘That’s why we wanted to get you both here to talk about it. I want to ask you something Nora, but your sister isn’t going to like it.’

Nora felt the tension climbing in her stomach, reaching up into her chest and grabbing her lungs. She could see Kathryn felt the same. ‘Kathryn won’t have told you, but she’s had a little bit of surgery and she needs looking after. Not for too much longer but—’

‘Surgery?’ Nora shouted over the music as it surged into an Eighties power ballad. ‘When? What for?’

‘It doesn’t matter and I’m on the mend now.’

Gill batted away Kathryn’s remarks. ‘We’ve been stopping in and getting some shopping and bits—’

‘And Mel’s been helping out.’

That explained why Mel, the barmaid had been so hostile when she’d walked in.

‘I was hoping,’ her mum said, looking to Nora. ‘That you’d stay for a few weeks to help out.’

‘I don’t need any help, Mum,’ Kathryn protested. ‘I can manage. And Nora doesn’t want to stay here. She has a life in London remember?’

Nora felt like her world had been turned on its axis. Her parents were off on an around the world cruise having sold the family home, her sister had undergone some sort of fairly major surgery – she wasn’t convinced by any of this little bit nonsense her mum was spouting, and no one had told her about it – and now, she was being asked to stay and look after her. She didn’t mind, if Kathryn needed her, she’d be there. When it came down to it, she was her sister after all. Nora wanted to ask why Neil wasn’t helping but maybe with his shiftwork and the kids, he was out a lot. Plus, she didn’t want it to sound like an excuse. Even with all that had gone before, Kathryn was her sister, and she wouldn’t leave her if she needed help. She could easily take some special leave from work if they wouldn’t agree to her taking holiday at short notice.

‘So, will you do it?’ Gill asked.

Kathryn protested before Nora could speak. ‘Mum, I really don’t need Nora helping me. I’m nearly healed, and Mel’s been great—’

‘Of course I’ll stay,’ Nora said, her eyes darting between them both. Kathryn’s gaze shot to her. ‘If you need me, I can take some time off work.’

Kathryn scowled, then dropped her eyes to the floor.

‘Come on love,’ Gill said. ‘Don’t be so stubborn. You know you need this.’

‘You – you can’t stay with me though,’ Kathryn conceded. ‘I haven’t got room.’

Kathryn and Neil’s house was a four-bedroom affair at the posh end of an even more posh village nearby. Even if the kids had a bedroom each, they’d have a spare room. Maybe Kathryn wasn’t ready to have Nora around 24/7. As if reading her thoughts, she added, ‘We’ve moved.’

‘It’s fine. I can probably stay on at the cottage and if not, Rob might have somewhere else I can rent. I’ll sort something out.’

‘There,’ said Gill, clapping her hands together. ‘That’s sorted then. Right, I’m off for a drink and tomorrow I can finish packing after a final go on the sunbed.’ She gave a little squeal of excitement and disappeared leaving Kathryn and Nora stood together.

Kathryn spoke first. ‘If she goes on those sunbeds anymore she’s going to look like a bit of old leather.’

Nora laughed as Scott joined them ‘I got drinks.’ He placed them down on the table. ‘And…’ With a flourish he presented ten cocktail sticks loaded with squares of cheddar and chunks of pineapple. ‘I stayed away while your mum was here. It all looked a bit intense. So, what did I miss?’

The disco music thumped in Nora’s ears and reverberated in her chest while her mouth opened and closed. Where did she even begin?

Chapter 6

‘Thanks, Rob. I really appreciate it.’ Nora walked back into the living room from the small galley kitchen and flopped onto the sofa next to Scott. She curled her legs up underneath her and swapped her mobile phone for a mug of tea. ‘Well, that’s my accommodation sorted. Rob said I can stay here for as long as I like. They hadn’t had any bookings for it yet as we’re just outside the holiday season.’ She pressed her hand, warmed from the mug, to her forehead that was beginning to pound with a headache. She didn’t normally suffer from headaches which meant she was stressed. Not surprising really. ‘At least that’s one thing off my mind.’

After returning from the party, Nora and Scott had sat up until the early hours, Nora numb from her parent’s announcement of their trip, the associated house sale and her sister’s mystery surgery. All the while, Scott chatted away, asking questions, trying to help her process it all. They’d talked round and round in circles, going over everything again and again, but her bewilderment remained. Eventually, they’d declared it was all nuts and went to bed. The dreams she’d had in the few hours of disturbed sleep were about cruises: the captain welcoming her and her bonkers family on a holiday together, she and her sister arguing on deck, staring out into wide blue waters. It hadn’t been particularly restful.

This morning, with gritty, tired eyes, she had to try and sort out this curve ball of looking after her sister. A spark of anger fired within her. How could her sister have had surgery of any sort and not let her know? Surely something like that was important and superseded any disagreements they’d had before. And even if Kathryn didn’t want to tell her, her mum could have. Gill’s text messages were never that regular but one about something as important as that would have been called for. Nora thought over seeing Kathryn again last night, but nothing in her appearance gave away what the operation could have been. She’d rubbed her stomach a few times and it seemed sore. Could it have been an appendicitis? But where was Neil and why wasn’t he with her last? He worked at a local supermarket and could have been on a late shift. If that was the case, why be so snippy about it? The trouble with having a difficult relationship was you didn’t know what was normal and what wasn’t.

Her parents were leaving at five, when Scott too would head back to London and their flat. Nora, for the time being it seemed, was staying here and that brought with it a whole heap of feelings she wasn’t too keen on exploring. She’d only been prepared to be here for a weekend. The town had always liked to gossip about her family’s misdemeanours and having to stick around while they discussed the latest and best so far would be torture.

‘What are you going to do about work?’ Scott asked, nursing his own drink. They’d settled on tea, but both would have preferred a gin. If only it wasn’t ten o’clock in the morning.

‘I’ve emailed and requested annual leave. That should give me a couple of weeks. As this is to look after my sick sister, they can’t really say no. Can they?’

‘If they try, I’ll put in a good word for you. It won’t be a problem.’

‘Thanks.’ Nora sighed and felt the rise and fall of her chest. The sun shone in through the living room window, warming her neck. The cottage was gorgeous and Little Harbour so different from her youth but visiting for a long weekend was quite different to staying here for two weeks or more. ‘I wish I was coming home with you. I know that sounds bad and selfish but … Kathryn and I haven’t really spoken for ages. I don’t even know what’s wrong with her. She denies it, but it seems to be something quite major. Why did no one tell me before?’

‘Because your family are about as good at communicating as I am at playing football.’

Nora chuckled remembering the charity five-a-side Scott had been press ganged into. He’d described it as one of the most traumatic and humiliating experiences of his life and given that he played football like two giraffes competing in a three-legged race she fully agreed.

‘You were at a party last night, though,’ Scott pointed out kindly. ‘With music blaring and lots of people around, it wasn’t the best place to discuss private matters—’

‘Unless you’re my bonkers parents.’

‘Maybe Kathryn will tell you today.’

She sighed. ‘I suppose you’re right. And I suppose with us not having spoken for ages she couldn’t just say, “Hi, how are you? I’ve had this and this and this happen.” I’m really starting to dread the idea of sticking around for two whole weeks.’

Scott tilted his head to the side. ‘Why? I thought you’d enjoyed being back. Before the party you were saying you might come back a bit more often.’

‘I meant for like odd weekends to stop in at the bookshop and stay in cute cottages like this one and do face masks and eat my body weight in cheesy pizza. What if the novelty wears off and I’m left feeling trapped, just like a did before?’

‘Wasn’t that because of your family?’ Nora nodded. ‘But they won’t be here. Your parent will be sitting in deckchairs in the sun, sipping cocktails or playing shuffleboard. Isn’t that what you do on cruises?’

Nora let her head rest in her hands. ‘This whole cruise thing makes me feel sick. I can just imagine Mum getting left at a port because she and Dad had a fight and didn’t make it back before the boat left. Or Dad getting arrested for doing something illegal or trying to smuggle something illegal or—’

‘Crikey, Nora. Slow down. They’re not Bonnie and Clyde and they haven’t even left yet. If they do anything, that’s on them. They’ll be over the other side of the world. You won’t be able to do much to help.’

‘No, but I better start saving for a lawyer anyway. I just know there’s going to be some sort of international diplomatic incident. And believe me, just because my parents are out of the way for a bit, my sister will make up for it. She’s hard enough work on her own.’

Thinking back to the fact that her parents had sold the family home in a private sale to go off on holiday, she almost wanted to laugh. It was just too ridiculous. There was no way in hell Scott’s parents, or anyone else’s, would do something like that. Most people who desperately wanted to go on a holiday they couldn’t afford just took out a loan. But not her parents. Oh no! Her parents had to sell their home. And not even through an estate agent. Heaven only knew what sort of a mess that was, and if it was even legal. Kathryn had been right last night to question where they were going to live when they got back. They clearly hadn’t thought that far ahead. Maybe they planned to just stay in the nicest place they came across on the cruise. Nora wouldn’t put that past them either, and at least she didn’t have anything at her parent house anymore. She’d moved everything out when she relocated to London.

‘Why don’t you and your sister get on?’ Scott asked, his smooth brow furrowing slightly. ‘You’ve never told me the full story of The Incident.’ He said the last bit like the guy who introduces action movies.

Nora considered telling him everything – arriving home from work early, opening the front door, seeing… No, she wouldn’t go back there. She couldn’t. As she’d begun to remember the events, the heat had risen on the back of her neck and her jaw tensed. She released it, realising she’d been clenching her teeth. More than any other feeling, the hurt was still there; short, sharp pains that stuck deep into her heart, and leftover feelings of betrayal that back then she’d vowed would never be forgiven. Nora was the type of person who once she said something, never went back on it. Some called it stubborn or immovable, but she liked to think it was integrity. Still, she wasn’t quite ready to divulge all the details. It wasn’t that she didn’t trust Scott or want to tell him, it was more that she wasn’t quite ready to feel all those things again. The prickling at the back of her neck at the merest glimpse of that memory told her so. ‘It doesn’t matter now,’ she said with an unfelt carelessness. ‘What matters is seeing Mum and Dad off and then, I suppose, having a chat with Kathryn about how this is all going to work.’ Nora sipped her now lukewarm tea and listened to the birds chatting outside and the gentle murmur of the sea a few streets away. ‘I wish you could stay with me.’

‘I do too, Nor.’ He reached out for her hand and gave it a squeeze. ‘But I promise I won’t move anyone in while you’re down here.’ She giggled at that. ‘And you know, as you’re here for a couple of weeks, you could go and see that guy from the bookshop. You were so worried about him on Friday when you got back. You might be able to make a few of those suggestions you were talking about.’

‘I could, couldn’t I?’ She sat up a little straighter, feeling a little bit more excited at the prospect of staying. And really, she should be positive. If her sister needed her, despite everything that had happened between them, she did want to help. She wanted to get to know her niece and nephew too. She’d missed out on so much of their lives already. Did she really want to miss out on anymore?

Most of all though, if she had a few cups of tea with Abe she could suggest some things while she was there. Nora still believed that waltzing in and criticising everything wasn’t the way to go, but a few friendly cuppas and the odd suggestions casually thrown in could make all the difference. She’d love to see the place back to its former glory. She got the impression that Alex wouldn’t be coming down anytime soon so that was at least one less complication. She wasn’t quite sure how she felt about seeing him again. Thanks to him, there’d always been something half-finished about their relationship. Like they could have gone a lot further if he’d bothered to stay in touch. She’d tried to let the hurt go, knowing they were young, and their lives were just about to start away from their boring hometown. In some ways it wasn’t surprising they’d lost touch so soon after moving away, but the pain her desperate efforts at contacting him brought up were better ignored.

‘I’ve had so many ideas for the shop, already,’ she said, regaining some enthusiasm and sitting even further forward so she perched on the very edge of her seat. ‘I mean, first of all, the place needs a really good clean, which I don’t mind helping out with at all. Then he needs to think about having a sale or something to shift some of the old stock. Some of it’s faded from the sun which means he needs some of that UV film over the windows. And, he needs to move the book-finding service online.’ Nora grabbed her phone and started tapping. ‘I checked online and there’s no website for the place, only Abe’s mobile number which I’m willing to bet is still the ancient one he had just before I went to uni. How are people supposed to know he can find you that first edition of – oh, I don’t know – Octopussy that—’

Scott spluttered and guffawed. ‘You said pussy.’

Nora narrowed her eyes in mock disapproval. ‘Don’t be childish. But Abe is amazing at finding rare books. Or at least he was. How is he going to get any business if no one knows he can do that?’

Scott chuckled. ‘That’s brought some colour to your cheeks. I don’t mind leaving you knowing you’re going to have at least a little bit of fun while you’re here. I don’t think I could go if I thought you were just going to be sat here being miserable, crying into your dinner for one.’

‘Oh, I still might be miserable, and I still might be phoning you up to blub at you when my sister gets moody, but I know deep down this is the right thing to do. And besides, dinner for one, lots of reading and relaxing—’

‘Baths in that amazing roll-top bath,’ Scott added dreamily.

‘Doesn’t sound that bad actually, does it?’

Scott crossed his arms over his chest and harrumphed. ‘I don’t want to go back now.’

***

As Scott decided to have one more self-indulgent and luxurious middle of the day bath before he headed back to London, Nora took a walk to the bookshop. She wasn’t entirely sure if it would be open on a Sunday, but with a few hours to kill before waving her parents off, she wanted something to take her mind off things. While she wondered if Abe might be working every hour he could to stop himself thinking about Muriel, with his lack of enthusiasm for the bookshop there was also the possibility that he might be doing something else entirely.

In her youth, Sundays in town were dead. She and Becky would wonder around the empty streets running into other kids doing the same. There was a youth centre, but no one ever went there. They’d wander miles and miles, come rain or shine, getting soaked to the skin then go their separate ways as it grew dark. It had been so strange seeing Becky. She’d seemed happy but also slightly lonely. Nora could tell immediately Becky and Rob were a good couple. They had that easy understanding of each other that most people longed for. She wondered if she and Alex would have been like them had they stayed in touch.

When she’d moved to London, resigned to the fact she and Alex would never see each other again, she’d thought she’d find a fabulous, sexy, suited man who’d wine and dine her and sweep her off her feet. Wherever he was, he was running extremely late. In all the time she’d been there, a few milder versions of this dream guy had shown up and taken her out on dates, but the real deal had never materialised. With a giggle, Nora remembered her and Becky swearing they’d never marry a guy from Little Harbour. It seemed so silly now.

The high street was incredibly busy with so many shops open and crowds sitting around outside the new fancy cafés and the older more established pubs. People nipped in and out of shops carrying bags of shopping; clothes, shoes, food, wine, anything and everything. The cool spring air carried a slight chill, but the sky overhead was a bright, shining blue. It was the perfect day for a spot of shopping. As she headed down Smuggler’s Lane towards The Book Nook, she noticed every shop on the little side street was just as busy as those on the main road. All except the bookshop.

From the corner of her eye, Nora had spotted Lou placing some amazing looking palmiers in the window, but she kept her gaze forward and headed on. She didn’t really want to get waylaid, but it was to no avail. Lou appeared in the doorway before Nora could pass the shop. ‘Your parents are the talk of the town again, Nora.’

‘I’m sure they are.’ Nora paused and placed her hands in her pockets. She knew Lou didn’t mean any offence, but it was hard to take a remark like that with good humour when the whole reason you’d left home was to get away from people’s comments. It still surprised her that Lou knew when she hadn’t even been at the party. The trouble was, news like that travelled like wildfire, especially when it came to her family.

‘Off around the world, hey? Well, why not, that’s what I say. If you can’t enjoy yourself at their age, then you might as well not bother living.’

Slightly lost for words, Nora simply nodded in response. Claire called Lou’s name and with a ‘cheerio’ she headed back into the shop. Nora met Claire’s eye and had the distinct feeling that she’d called her mother in on purpose to save her. Nora flashed her a grateful smile.

Shielding her eyes, she stared in the window of The Book Nook, and into the darkness of the shop, there were no signs of life. Why on earth wasn’t the place open? She knocked on the front door, avoiding groups of people who were strolling along, arms full of shopping. Abe was missing a trick. After a few minutes, a shadowy figure came into view, shuffling towards the door. Abe’s face lit up as he realised who it was, and Nora couldn’t help but beam back.

He unclicked the lock and opened the door. ‘Nora! Hello. I thought you’d be heading back to London today.’

‘Well, it turns out I’m staying here for a couple of weeks.’

‘Really?’

Nora shrugged. ‘You know how things are with my family. Get them involved and everything goes a bit pear-shaped.’

‘Sounds interesting. You better come in and tell me all about it over tea.’

She followed into the dark shop and around the counter to the stairs. The top floor contained the flat where Abe, Muriel and Alex had lived together. It wasn’t huge but it was cosy and comfortable with a large sitting room that faced onto the harbour. As with downstairs, the place was dusty, and the carpet needed a good hoover. Poor Abe must really be struggling, Nora thought with a heaviness in her heart. He led her into the sitting room and told her to take a seat while he made some tea.

Two large bookshelves were heavy with well-thumbed books, the spines crinkled and cracked. In the middle was the dark green sofa. It was worn on the arms and slightly threadbare in places. Whereas the shop was dark from some of the built-up grime on the window, up here was light and sunny. The faded curtains were pulled back to reveal the huge windows she remembered as a young girl. When she and Alex had dated before they left for university, they’d cuddle on this sofa watching terrible daytime TV. Her heart pulsed at the memory.

On the sideboard she spied framed photographs. Some had been dusted, or she suspected wiped down with a handkerchief. There were some she remembered from her youth; photographs of Muriel and Abe on their wedding day, both holding their son in a giant white Christening robe and even some of Alex at school. There was one of him graduating university and even then, he was beginning to turn into the handsome man she always knew he would be. The thought sent a shiver through her. He had a thin layer of dark stubble on his cheeks and a twinkle in his eye. She remembered that twinkle well.

As Abe entered, carrying a wooden tray, she let the thought fade away and concentrated on him and the shop, and all she wanted to say before she had to go and bid goodbye to Scott.

‘Biscuits,’ she said with a grin.

‘Tea should always be taken with biscuits or cake. Don’t you remember tea breaks in the shop? We’d always have some of Muriel’s cake. I can’t bake like her, but I can buy a packet of biscuits.’ His hand shook a little as he poured the tea. Not from infirmity or age, she was sure, but from the weight of emotion sitting on his rounded shoulders. ‘Now, what’s all this about you staying for two weeks? I didn’t think we’d ever see you again and yet, here you are, not just back for a weekend but for a fortnight.’

‘It’s not quite what I had planned either.’ Nora took the mug and a biscuit and dunked it in.

‘I’d forgotten you were a dunker,’ said Abe.

‘That’s what biscuits are for. You can’t just eat them dry. Yuck.’ She gave a mock shudder.

‘So what’s going on?’

Nora outlined everything that had happened last night and that she was due to meet Kathryn in a few hours to see their parents off together.

‘Crikey.’

‘Yep. Anyway, what’s going on with you, Abe?’ she asked gently. ‘You don’t seem very happy. And I know you miss Muriel, but—’

‘Oh, flower, missing doesn’t even come close.’

Abe had always called her ‘flower’ and Nora adored it. Her parents never had any pet names for her or her sister. She could remember the day Abe had started calling her it. He’d always loved flowers; fuchsias in particular and he’d found one in a book called ‘Bella Nora’. After that, he’d called her flower all the time and it had made her feel a part of something bigger than just her small, insane family.

‘I’m so sorry, Abe. I wish there was something I could do.’ She hugged her cup before continuing. ‘Can I ask you something?’ He looked up, a slight wariness in his eyes. ‘Have you had enough of running the bookshop?’

‘What? No! Well…’ He sat back with his cup of tea. ‘It’s not that I’ve had enough of it, but it’s a lot to do on my own.’

‘Why don’t you hire some help?’

‘I can’t afford it, flower. Like I said yesterday, the shop isn’t making as much as it was.’

‘Well,’ she ventured, hoping he wouldn’t hate the suggestion. ‘I’m going to be here for a couple of weeks helping Kathryn with a few things. Why don’t I help with the shop a bit too?’

‘You’d do that for an old duffer like me?’

‘Of course I would.’ She reached out and gave his hand a squeeze. ‘And you’re not that old. If my parents can go off on an around the world cruise, living it up at their age, then you can certainly stop with all this old business. You’re exactly the same age as them.’

‘I can’t believe they’re doing that,’ said Abe.

‘Don’t even get me started. They’ve sold the house to fund it all.’ Nora sighed. ‘I guess they’re never going to change.’

‘No, maybe not. But you’re a good girl.’ He cupped her cheek, and his hands were cold despite holding the warm mug of tea. ‘There isn’t a lot to do in the shop though.’

Nora hoped her face wasn’t registering the disbelief she felt deep down. As far as she could see there was a whole hell of a lot to do, starting with a deep clean and scraping some of the damp, caked on dust off the windows. ‘Well, we can start with giving everything a bit of a tidy up and see where we are then, can’t we?’ she said tactfully. Thankfully, Abe nodded his approval. ‘I’m seeing Kathryn this afternoon to figure out what she needs me to do and when, how about I start on Monday morning at nine o’clock?’

‘Just like old times.’ A light flashed beneath the watery blue of his irises, bringing them to life.

Nora realised that for a couple of weeks she was going to do her dream job and a thrill of anticipation shot through her. ‘Just like old times.’

Chapter 7

A few hours later, after she’d seen Scott back to London in the hire car, Nora and Kathryn stood outside what had been their parents’ house and waved them off on their jolly holiday. Though how jolly it would be in a couple of days’ time she still wasn’t sure.

In the half an hour they’d been waiting for their mum to stop faffing around and get in the car, they’d been able to discover a little more about the sale of the house. Dom had confirmed that they had indeed sold the house privately to a friend of his called Napalm Nigel. Between fits of laughter, Dom had described how Nigel had once blown up his shed trying to light a bonfire on Guy Fawkes night. His eyebrows too had come off in the process and were yet to grow back. It wasn’t exactly settling news and the fact his name was Napalm Nigel filled Nora with terror.

Though her parents weren’t having to move out all their stuff (Nigel was quite happy for them to leave it until they got back) Nora couldn’t help but worry what state it would all be in by the time they returned. The only good thing was the sale had been completed through their respective solicitors so provided they weren’t as dodgy as Napalm Nigel looked, it should all be above board.

As their parent’s car rounded the end of the street and disappeared from view, Kathryn said. ‘I’m glad that’s done, aren’t you? At one point I was worried Mum wouldn’t actually get in the car.’

‘To be honest, I don’t know what to feel right now. I’m so confused about it all and everything has been turned upside down.’

‘I never asked you to stay,’ Kathryn fired back. ‘Mum did. You could have said no.’

‘I didn’t mean that, Kathryn. I meant—’ If this was how the next two weeks were going to go it would be absolute torture. Why did they always spark off each other all the time? Last night she’d hoped it might have worn off with them both being adults but clearly not. ‘I just meant Mum and Dad’s announcement and yes, staying to help you is a bit of a surprise, but I want to. I don’t mind.’ Kathryn crossed her arms over her chest and watched the kids playing in what had been her Mum and Dad’s front garden. ‘Where’s Neil?’ Nora asked, her brow furrowing.

‘Oh Christ, do you have to ask questions all the time? Here’s not here.’

‘I can see that,’ Nora replied, briskly. They were so alike in some ways. Maybe that was why they’d always argued. She calmed her voice. ‘I just thought he might want to come and wave goodbye. He’s always got on with Mum and Dad, hasn’t he?’

‘Huh.’

Biting back a retort, Nora said, ‘Do you want to go to yours or mine and we’ll sort out how this whole thing is going to work?’

‘Yours?’ Kathryn replied. Nora wasn’t sure if Kathryn was surprised she had a place to go to, or at the invitation. ‘Well, umm, yours, if you don’t mind. Will the kids be all right there?’

‘It’s got a lovely garden they can play in, and it’s all enclosed so they can’t go anywhere and get lost.’

‘Okay.’ Even though Kathryn had agreed, she seemed reticent at the idea, or perhaps she was reluctant to spend time with Nora. Neither had mentioned The Incident yet but it often hung in the air between them like a Sword of Damocles, ready to drop and ruin whatever fragile peace they’d negotiated. Considering they’d be spending a lot more time together over the next two weeks, it didn’t bode well, but Nora determined to be cheerful.

Back at the cottage, she let Avril and Ozzie into the back garden and Kathryn made herself comfortable on the sofa. ‘This is nice,’ she called into the kitchen where Nora was making tea. ‘Did you say it was one of Rob’s places?’

‘Yeah. He’s been really helpful. He said I could stay as long as I like. It’s called Pebble Cottage. Isn’t that sweet?’

‘Very.’

Nora entered the sitting room and the strained atmosphere that always clung around them descended again. She took a deep breath as the air became suddenly stifling. Through the car journey over, she’d been thinking about how best to approach this issue with Kathryn but hadn’t decided on any one tactic. Kathryn clearly didn’t want Nora to know what had been going on with her, but Nora had questions that needed answering in order to fully support her sister. Nora decided just to come straight out and ask the questions playing on her mind.

‘So, come on Kathryn. What’s going on?’

Kathryn’s shoulders tightened. ‘Nothing’s going on.’

‘There is. And I don’t just mean physically. Where was Neil today? Why didn’t you want to go to your house?’ Kathryn stared down into her cup. Her hair was the same shade of brown as Nora’s with a few more greys at the crown of her head. ‘Please tell me, Kathryn. I do want to help you, and it’ll make life easier for both of us if I know what’s going on.’

‘I suppose I can’t keep it secret anymore. Everyone else knows.’ Kathryn craned her neck to see out of the large kitchen window, into the back garden. The children were still busy running up and down, hiding behind some of the larger bushes like they were in a fairy tale. Kathryn met Nora’s gaze, an obstinacy in her features that immediately put Nora on edge, her defences were coming up making it even harder for them to communicate. She waited for Kathryn to speak. ‘Neil left me.’

‘What? When?’ A flash of cold washed over her. Kathryn’s exterior was hard, but Nora could see the vulnerability in her eyes. ‘Kathryn I’m—’

‘Don’t say you’re sorry,’ she barked, holding up her hand. ‘I don’t need people to be sorry for me. It’s his loss.’

Though her manner was harsh, Nora heartily agreed with the sentiment. It bloody well was Neil’s loss. How could he do that? How could he leave his kids? ‘When did this happen?’

‘About three months ago. I’m now renting a two-bed house just around the corner from Mum and Dad’s.’

‘Three months ago? Why didn’t you tell me?’

‘Oh, yeah,’ she scoffed. ‘Like I could have just rung you up and said, “Hi Nora. I know we haven’t spoken properly for ages but guess what? I’m getting divorced.” After what I did—’ She swallowed, letting the unspoken words hang in the air. ‘What would you have done?’

Nora’s heart thudded in her chest at the mention of The Incident. Three months ago, when her sister’s life was falling apart, Nora’s had been exactly the same as it had always been. She spent her time working or in the flat with Scott. She didn’t have any other friends and when he was with Ravi, she stayed in and read. The reality was, she found it hard to trust people and that had always stopped her forming friendships. Her London life, though Kathryn didn’t know it, hadn’t ended up quite as interesting and jet-set as she’d hoped, and as she and Kathryn didn’t speak, it wasn’t strange that she hadn’t told her something so monumental. To her shame, Nora didn’t know what she would have done if the phone call had come. Would she have rushed down? Would she have thought she deserved it? No, she wouldn’t. No matter what had occurred before Nora knew she would have helped if she could.

‘What happened?’ she asked gently.

‘He started screwing an employee. The only blessing is she isn’t half his age, so at least I’m not a complete cliché.’

Nora wouldn’t be shopping at that supermarket again that was for sure. If she ran into him there was no telling what she might do. Right now, she felt like punching him in his vegetable aisle. ‘Do the kids know?’

‘We told them we’re having some time apart. I haven’t told them their dad’s a lying cheating scumbag.’ She glanced at Nora and a faint pinkness came to her cheeks. Was Kathryn thinking those words applied to herself? The realisation that she might, hurt Nora as much as she could see it hurt Kathryn. She didn’t want her to feel like that, not after all this time.

‘And what about your health?’ Nora asked quietly.

‘What about it?’

‘Well, what’s going on? What happened? Mum said you had surgery for something. What was it?’

‘It doesn’t matter. Or are you not going to help me unless I tell you?’ Kathryn’s hardness came back in an instant.

‘Of course I’ll help you. I might have said things like that when I was fifteen and a stroppy teenager, but I’m not fifteen anymore. I’m just worried about you.’ Kathryn clearly found that hard to believe and Nora could understand why. She’d spent so long keeping her distance from her family she couldn’t expect Kathryn to trust her straight away.

‘I had a little bit of an op, but it was nothing and I’m fine. I’m signed off work for another couple of weeks but after that everything will be back to normal.’

‘Was it an appendicitis or something?’ That was the only thing she could think of that required an operation and wasn’t completely scary.

‘Yeah, something like that.’ Kathryn craned her neck to check on the children again.

The matter was closed, but Nora wasn’t entirely convinced that Kathryn had told the truth. The good thing was, whatever was going on, she was recovering. The children’s loud giggling voices carried in through the open kitchen window. They were playing tag, laughing and joking like there was no one else in the world except for them.

Kathryn’s cup clattering on the coffee table brought Nora back to their conversation. ‘I’ve got the doctor’s next week for a follow-up.’

‘Okay, do you need me to drive you?’

‘No, I can manage.’

Nora resisted the urge to roll her eyes. ‘So, what is it you want me to help out with? What sort of thing did Mum do for you? I still can’t believe she did anything for you at all, if I’m honest.’

A wry smile came to Kathryn’s face. Nora noticed how tired she looked. Like life had completely worn her out. ‘You’d be surprised. She’s changed a bit since I had kids. Dad too. They’ve both…softened as they’ve got older. Mum would even babysit sometimes.’ Kathryn rested a hand over her stomach. ‘Surprising I know. I just get a bit tired. Something’s taking its time to heal. Mum would watch the kids for an hour – take them to the park so I could sleep – do shopping for me a couple of times a week. I’m not supposed to lift anything heavy which is a joke with a toddler, but still…’

‘Okay. Do you need me to stop in most days?’

Kathryn shrugged. ‘Let’s just play it by ear. We don’t want to start having rows in front of the kids. I’ve done enough of that with their dad.’

Overcome with a mixture of guilt that she hadn’t been there for her sister and hope that this could be the start of a new chapter, Nora reached forward and took Kathryn’s hand Her eyes widened in surprise, but she didn’t pull away. It was progress of sorts, she just hoped they could keep going in the right direction. ‘If you need anything just text me and I’ll be straight there.’ She waited for reprisals and aggression, but none came. Kathryn slumped deeper into the sofa rubbing her eyes. ‘Do you want to go and have a sleep for an hour? You do look a bit tired.’

‘I’m always tired,’ she said without any real thought.

‘I’ll watch the kids. They’re happily playing, and I can do them some dinner. It won’t be the healthiest ever, but it’ll be edible. I can still make a mean burger. I remember you making me fish-finger sandwiches when I was in primary school.’

‘When dad had buggered off and Mum was in one of her moods.’ Kathryn hesitated but eyed the stairs. ‘Are you sure? I probably won’t sleep but after last night I just feel exhausted.’

‘The beds are really comfy,’ Nora teased, flashing a smile, surprisingly, Kathryn returned it.

‘Just half an hour, okay?’

After half an hour, Nora stepped onto the bottom stair and could hear Kathryn’s gentle snoring. She decided to leave her to rest for a bit longer. The kids were playing nicely in the garden and the house was quiet. It would do Kathryn good to sleep for longer.

An hour later, Nora left her niece and nephew in front of the TV and woke Kathryn who was still sleeping soundly. Though a little groggy, she gave a half-smile when she opened her eyes and looked around the cosy bedroom.

‘I’m sorry to wake you,’ Nora said, ‘but I wasn’t sure when the kids needed to go to bed and when I asked them, they gave me five different answers.’

Kathryn sat up. Though she had to push herself up slowly, wincing uncomfortably, she seemed refreshed for the nap. ‘Yeah, they do that. How long was I asleep?’

‘An hour.’

‘An hour?’ Kathryn’s eyes shot wide open and like lightening, she jumped out of bed, regretting the movement straight away. ‘Damn.’ She pulled on the shoes she’d kicked off. ‘I said half an hour, Nora. Why did you let me sleep for an hour?’

‘You were exhausted,’ Nora rambled, concern mounting as she watched Kathryn flap around the bedroom. They’d finally been in the same room without shouting at each other but that was rapidly changing as Kathryn muttered expletives to herself. ‘I’m sorry. You just seemed like you needed a rest. It’s only half an hour more than you said, and you clearly needed it. It’s no big deal.’

‘No big deal? No big deal?’ Kathryn placed her hands on her hips. ‘It might not be a big deal for you with no kids and no commitments to worry about, but for me it’s a huge deal. The kids are going to be late to bed now which means I’ll have to rush through their routine. Because I’ll be rushing, they won’t settle which means I won’t get any evening at all – they’ll be up and down till God knows what time and then I’ll be so wound up I won’t sleep and then I get to do it all again tomorrow morning. All with the added bonus of grouchy kids because they haven’t slept enough. Thanks a lot, Nora.’

Nora felt like she’d been smacked in the face. Had she really thrown out the whole evening, all because she let Kathryn sleep for half an hour more than she’d asked for? Nora hadn’t thought it would, but she didn’t have kids so on that front, she couldn’t argue with any certainty. Kathryn wasn’t done yet.

‘Why don’t you ever respect anyone else’s wishes?’

‘What do you mean?’ Nora asked. ‘I do respect other people’s wishes.’

‘You don’t. You never have. You always think everyone should do exactly what you’ve done.’

What was that supposed to mean? ‘I was only trying to help,’ she mumbled, wrapping her arms over her chest to protect from the onslaught of Kathryn’s temper.

‘Well don’t. If you’re going to help me, you’re going to have to do what I ask, not what you want to do. Our lives are different to yours. We can’t just do things whenever we like because we don’t have anyone else to worry about.’

And with that parting shot, Kathryn flounced out of the bedroom and down the stairs. She gathered the kids up like a Formula One pit crew changing a tyre and with a few shouted goodbyes from Avril and Ozzie, she was gone. Shell-shocked, Nora went to the kitchen and poured herself a large glass of wine before locating her paperback. She was re-reading Gone with the Wind and thanked heaven she’d brought it with her. It was quite a sizeable read and, clearly, it was going to be a very long two weeks.

Chapter 8

Alex dropped the remote control as the ring of his mobile pulled him out of the TV watching fug he’d disappeared into. He didn’t normally get calls in the evening. He had a few friends, but they texted or chatted on the group chat. The only two people who phoned him were Cassie and his dad and Cassie’s calls were few and far between now.

His mum had always been the one to call. Once a week, like clockwork, every Tuesday at eight. She wanted to check in and see how he was doing, what he was working on, what he was eating. She wanted to know the minutiae of his life but not in an overbearing way. It was how they stayed connected even though they were miles apart. Talking about nothing was just as important as talking about the things that were bothering them both. She’d always have a jokey moan about his dad and sometimes Alex would joke about his girlfriends. She hadn’t known Cassie. She’d never met her. Alex had mentioned her name in the months before his mum died, but as they’d only just started dating it seemed too much to suddenly bring her down to see her fading away – too intrusive somehow. They’d only got together six months before. She’d attended the funeral with him though. And that, it turned out, had been the catalyst for one of the worst mistakes of his life.

Would his mum have liked her? he wondered. Cassie was a lovely girl, but he had a feeling his mum would have seen how things were going to end up between them. She had a knack for seeing him as he really was. His dad was never that perceptive, especially about relationships. Even now Abe had no idea that things had changed so much, but that was Alex’s fault because he’d never told him.

Finally locating his phone and pulling it out from between the sofa cushions, he was surprised to see it was his dad. Neither admitted it, but both of them were finding it harder and harder to talk on the phone, or face-to-face for that matter. Their conservations were so forced it felt disloyal to his mum but even so, he was looking forward to hearing his voice. He still needed to speak to him about coming down to visit. He swiped the screen.

‘Hey, Dad.’

‘Hello, son.’

Silence descended and Alex bit his lip as he swung his legs round and sat up. ‘Everything all right?’

‘Yes, yes. Fine. I just thought I’d call and see how you were doing? You said something last week about this toothpaste thing you were working on.’

Alex brushed a hand down his face, feeling the stubble beneath his fingers. He was still working on it but didn’t want to admit that to his dad, he’d only worry. ‘Yeah, it’s getting there,’ he lied. ‘What’s new with you?’

‘Oh, nothing. Nothing.’ Alex knew that was going to be the answer before his dad said it. It was what he always said. He was just about to ask him how the shop was when his dad continued. ‘Well apart from Nora Bell being back in town. Do you remember her? You and she had a thing for a while, didn’t you? That summer before you both went off to university.’

Straightening up, Alex found his heart beating a little faster at the thought of Nora Bell.

His mum had always loved Nora. Muriel always thought of her as the one that got away and no amount of talking on his part had convinced her that they’d both just been too young for a serious commitment. At least, that was what he’d told himself and had given it as his reason for losing touch with her but sometimes in the night, he was curious as to what might have happened had they gone the distance.

‘She’s back?’ Alex asked and his erratic breathing made his voice waver. ‘For good?’

‘No, she’s back for a couple of weeks. She came home for a family party, but her batty parents have declared they’re off on an around the world cruise. Can you believe it?’ Yes, he could. Very easily. ‘She’s staying to look after her sister.’

‘Why does Kathryn need looking after?’ Kathryn was the fiercest woman Alex had ever met. She’d been an angry teenager.

‘I didn’t know if it was true or not so didn’t say anything to Nora when we had tea earlier—’

‘You had tea with Nora? Today?’ Alex knew his voice had grown high with excitement, like a kid at a birthday party, and he tried to bring it down.

‘Yes.’ Abe tutted at the interruption. ‘I heard from one of the customers her husband has left her—’

‘What Nora’s husband? She’s married?’

‘No!’ Abe was no longer at the tutting stage; he’d moved on to annoyed. ‘The sister’s husband has left.’

‘God, poor Kathryn.’

He could sympathise with what she was going through. She and Nora sparked off each other, but Kathryn had been like a surrogate mum, even though she was only five years older. It had created a strange family dynamic that they both struggled with.

‘Seems he was having an affair with one of his co-workers.’

‘That’s horrible.’ For all Alex’s faults and the failings in his own relationships, neither he, nor Cassie as far as he was aware, had cheated.

‘It is,’ Abe agreed. ‘Too horrible. What a blighter. But it means Nora’s back for a couple of weeks.’ Alex could feel the excitement in his dad’s voice travelling the distance between them. ‘Isn’t that marvellous? She wants to help out in the shop while she’s here. I told her it doesn’t need much but—’

As far as The Book Nook was concerned, his dad had gone somewhat blind. The last time Alex had visited, the place was accumulating a thick layer of dust, and he’d cleaned as much as he could but when Abe had started asking questions about Cassie, Alex had been forced to make an early escape. It was a pretty poor show really and in his mind’s eye he could see his mum’s disapproving face. He’d done it with the best of intentions, wanting to spare his dad anymore pain and a whole lot of worry given it hadn’t been long since her death, but it was cowardly.

‘Anyway,’ Abe said, sounding more and more cheerful. ‘She’s coming in tomorrow, so I better get off and leave you too it. I want an early night in case she puts me to work dusting the odd shelf.’

It was going to take more than a light bit of housework to get the shop resembling respectable, but a smile formed on Alex’s face. ‘Good night, Dad. Speak soon, okay.’

The first thing Alex did once he’d put his phone down was to stand up and walk around the living room, scratching the back of his head. A very odd assortment of feelings circled in his brain, causing a visceral physical reaction in his heart. His dad sounded almost…happy. And that wasn’t something he’d heard in a long time. Then there was the phenomenon that was Nora Bell.

He wondered what she looked like now. She’d always had long thick eyelashes and dark hair flecked through with strands of gold. You didn’t see them that often, only when the light caught it in a certain way, but they were there if you looked close enough. He wondered how many guys had seen them and found a stab of jealousy shoot into the back of his brain. He remembered her laugh, the way she’d pull her legs up when she was really giggling, like the joy she felt was centred in her belly and she had to protect it. He hadn’t really thought of these things in a long time and yet he remembered them all so clearly, or perhaps they’d been in his mind more often than he realised.

Alex’s body twitched with unspent energy as he gazed around his boring new house. There were some standard prints on the magnolia walls, and everything was beige. A sudden craving for home hit him like a punch to the stomach and he realised in his dad’s excitement he hadn’t sorted out coming to visit. He wanted to be surrounded by familiar things, photos of his mum, the furniture he’d grown up with. He wanted to see the bookshop, to smell that aroma particular to paper. He’d always found it comforting.

Perhaps it was time for a longer visit? He could do his job from anywhere and a change of scene might recharge his creative batteries. He pictured himself sitting on the harbour wall, taking deep breaths of the salt sea air. He might even take a few early morning walks when the light carried that eerie hue, growing stronger with each step, and you felt like the only person awake in the entire town. Alex pictured sitting with Nora having a cup of coffee at one of the cute places that had popped up on the harbour arm over the last few years. If she was only back for a couple of weeks, he’d better get down there quick. This might be his one and only chance to apologise for how he’d let things end between them and he could make up for lost time with his dad.

It was only just after seven. If he left now, he could be in Little Harbour for eleven. It would be far too late to wake his dad and stay at home, but he could check into a hotel for one night and surprise his dad in the morning. Maybe take some breakfast along. He’d love to see the smile on his dad’s face when he turned up out of the blue with coffee and bacon sandwiches. Excitement tightened the muscles of his stomach and before he could stop himself, he ran upstairs to pack a suitcase.

Chapter 9

As Nora sat eating a slice of toast, she took a moment to appreciate the silence. It was strange waking up in a quiet house with no alarm blaring angrily, shouting for her to get up because she’d overslept. Scott wasn’t the quietest person in the world either and would often crash around or simply waltz in and yell at her to get out of bed because they were late. Then there’d be the mad dash to get showered and dressed and if there wasn’t time for a full hair wash, the faithful dry shampoo would come out. She loved living and working with Scott, but had to admit, this quieter, slower pace of life was proving a nice break.

Nora took a moment to enjoy the sunshine streaming in through the kitchen window and listened to the seagulls cawing from the rooftops. It was bit chilly this morning and she’d dressed in her favourite jeans, a cute jumper with a rainbow on it, and trainers. Luckily, the cottage had a washing machine. As she’d only planned on being here for the weekend, she hadn’t packed many outfits and couldn’t exactly turn up in the sparkly jumpsuit she’d worn to the party. She’d also enjoyed not having to rush with her make-up. Applying eyeliner whilst being jiggled by a train was a fine art she’d mastered. Today though, she’d taken her time in applying it. It was such a small act of self-care, but it had felt supremely self-indulgent. She hadn’t realised before how the erratic pace of life in London had messed with her self-esteem. Perhaps she’d let her vivid imagination dictate what her life should have been like and when it hadn’t ended up that way, she’d felt a bit of a failure. She remembered reading Tales of the City by Armistead Maupin and Sex and the City by Candace Bushnell shortly before she moved to London and though those books were set somewhere entirely different, they’d given a vivid image of city life London should have lived up to. When it hadn’t, it had taken her a while to adjust. She was beginning to realise maybe it was her who hadn’t belonged there. Applying a little bit of blusher to the apples of her cheeks, she felt more confident than she had in a long time and after fastening her hair in a messy bun she was ready to head-off to Abe’s.

The short walk to The Book Nook was refreshing in the crisp spring air. Nora strolled along the edge of the harbour following the line of large planters full of flowers. They were coming out to bloom and the yellow daffodils held their heads high to signal the arrival of a new season. By now, the fishermen had all returned from their early morning starts and were busy cleaning and mooring their boats in the harbour. When the tide was out, you could often see the gulls dancing on the silty, wet sand in the hopes of luring out some lugworms. Watching them made her smile.

The grimy windows of The Book Nook came into sight and as she turned down the lane, Abe greeted her at the door. With a big, wide smile he surprised her by wrapping her in a hug. She enjoyed the warmth of his affection and gave him a squeeze back.

‘So, what’s on the cards for today?’ he asked, moving back towards the counter and handing over a cup of tea he’d made ready for her arrival.

‘I thought, we’d start with the windows to get some light in. Haven’t you noticed it’s a bit dark in here?’ Seeing Abe’s face fall, Nora was reminded of Kathryn’s comment that she only ever did what she wanted and her promise to tread carefully. She softened her approach. ‘Big windows like this are terrible for attracting dust and grime, and being so near the harbour, you get all the salt from the sea. That’s what causes such a build-up. I thought, once we’d had tea, I could start on the outside and you could start on the inside? I’m sure together it won’t take us long to get it shining, but you might want to think about getting a window cleaner if you don’t fancy keep on doing it yourself.’

Abe smiled and relief flooded through her.

After Kathryn had left on Sunday night, Nora had tried to read Gone with the Wind but found she couldn’t concentrate. With so many thoughts whizzing through her head, she’d sat with a glass of wine and a notebook and considered all the jobs that needed doing in the bookshop. Window displays were non-existent, as was a website. Tidying up every square metre had to be a priority, as was cleaning anything and everything. Then there was signage, expanding the range…the list was endless. That list was now tucked into her jeans pocket. Knowing how enormous it was, she didn’t want to scare Abe by blurting out everything or for him to get cross and tell her not to come back. The best way forward for them both was probably just to take it one job at a time. Hopefully then it would seem less like a mountain to climb and more of a gentle incline.

Dodging between two small tables piled high with books, Nora went to the counter and drank some of her tea. Abe hadn’t replied yet and she was worried he was already regretting allowing her in. After gazing between the front window onto Smuggler’s Lane and the larger side window onto the harbour, he said, ‘Do you know, I think I’ve got so used to looking at those windows, I just didn’t notice before, but now you mention it, I can see a bit of grime.’

Nora chalked his remark up to progress, even though it was the understatement of the year. Then again, sometimes, you were so caught up in something, it was difficult to see things how they really were. ‘No biscuits today?’ she asked with a cheeky grin.

‘For breakfast? I’ve got some for elevenses, but surely we can’t have biscuits for breakfast? Muriel would never have allowed that.’

‘I remember she used to make me toast when I’d come in on Saturday’s because I’d either got up late or we didn’t have anything in the house.’

Kathryn had always done her best to step into their mum’s shoes and pick up the pieces when Gill was in one of her moods, but there were times, like when Kathryn was sitting her A Levels, that she just couldn’t juggle all those balls. Now Nora thought about it, Kathryn had had a lot on her plate growing up. Maybe more than Nora had ever realised. And recently, life had given her another kick in the teeth. ‘Muriel made the best peanut butter on toast, ever. I don’t know how she managed to make it so it didn’t stick to the roof of your mouth and stop you being able to chew.’

‘Well,’ Abe said playfully, ‘the biscuits I bought for elevenses are peanut butter cookies.’ There was a mischievous twinkle in his eye.

‘Really?’ Nora tilted her head to the side. ‘That’s pretty much the same as having peanut butter on toast, isn’t it?’

‘Exactly,’ he declared, dipping down behind the counter and pulling out a packet of expensive, top-quality cookies. Opening the wrapper, he offered them to Nora and took one himself. ‘To Muriel.’

‘To Muriel,’ she echoed, and even though the moment was a little sad, there was a fondness and appreciation of the woman who was no longer with them. They tapped their biscuits together before he tutted at her for dunking it in her tea.

After their impromptu biscuit-breakfast, Nora moved their mugs behind the counter. ‘Now, I need a bucket of water for outside and you need one for inside. And we need some cloths.’

‘Right you are.’ He gave a mock salute and went off upstairs in search of supplies. As Abe made his way, Nora took a moment to see if the little downstairs bathroom was still there. It was a tiny room at the back of the shop with a toilet and small sink and as Nora peered from behind the counter, she was pleased to see it was still there so she wouldn’t have to go all the way upstairs to change the water. She walked down the little corridor and passed the staircase to Abe’s flat that was covered with the same dark red velvet curtain it had always been. As she passed the door to the room Abe and Muriel called the junk room, she decided to take a quick look at what was inside.

Back in the day it had held boxes and boxes of books because they sold them so quickly, they needed enough to replenish the shelves. The sight that met her eyes shouldn’t have surprised her given the state of the place, but it did. The door barely opened enough for her to fit in, and the room was over-flowing with boxes, some of them unopened. She’d always considered it a bit of a waste of space. They could get another few bookshelves in there or use the room for something else. She wasn’t sure what yet, but Nora was absolutely certain that given free reign she could find a good use that would encourage more trade. She stepped inside and unable to help herself as curiosity got the better of her, she opened one of the boxes. It was full of classic children’s books. She picked one up, admiring the colourful cover. It was Winnie the Pooh and The House at Pooh Corner. She’d loved that book as a child, and still had a copy of it in her box room in London, lodged in one of the many preciously balanced piles of books she couldn’t bear to part with. She ran her fingers over the cover, opened it and flicked through the pages. The illustrations and wonderful writing still made her heart sing. How she desperately wanted someone else to feel that way, as an adult and as a child. Knowing she was getting lost in her love of books, she opened the next box. It contained neat silicone wrapped packets of pretty wrapping paper and cards.

‘Before Muriel died,’ came Abe’s voice from over her shoulder, making her jump. ‘She thought we should start selling gift-wrapping and cards as a way to increase income. They’ve been here since…’

All the joy faded from his face.

‘Abe! I’m so sorry, I shouldn’t have—’ Nora stood and closed the lid of the box before scurrying back to the door. ‘I wasn’t trying to be nosy. I just wanted to see if they were books we could sell. I’m so sorry.’

‘It’s fine,’ he said, closing the door behind her, but it was clear she’d taken a liberty, and he didn’t thank her for it. Feeling guilt inch up her neck, Nora kept her eyes down as she took the two bowls he had found for cleaning the windows. Abe’s voice was quiet as he spoke. ‘I’ll take these cloths out front.’

Cursing herself for her lack of sensitivity, Nora went to the sink and filled up the bowls of water. She felt so heartily ashamed of herself for doing what she’d said wouldn’t. She’d gone charging in, treating the place like it was hers and now she’d hurt Abe in the process. When she came back into the shop with the second bowl, Abe was stood by the window looking out. She felt the need to clear the air.

‘Abe, I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have gone in there. I should have asked first. I didn’t mean to intrude on your privacy.’

He turned and the look on his face confused her. She couldn’t make out the emotion he was feeling. ‘It’s my fault, flower. I’ve got a little too stuck in my ways these last couple of years.’

‘I think we all do, sometimes, Abe. I think I have too, you know.’ He gave a slight nod of his head in recognition of what she’d said. Grateful for his kindness, Nora tried to jolly them both up. ‘Shall we have some music while we clean?’

‘I haven’t got anything to play it on.’

‘Don’t worry. We can use my mobile phone. What do you fancy?’

A light shone through the darkness of his demeanour. ‘Let’s have a bit of classical, shall we? It always makes jobs easier.’

Nora nodded and found a classical radio station. With the door open she could just about hear it outside as they began to clean the windows. Every now and then they’d pull funny faces at each other through the glass and Abe was returning to the man she’d known all those years ago. She’d almost finished a first going over of the large window that faced the harbour when the smell of bacon hit her nostrils. Even after her toast and the additional biscuits, the enticing aroma, combined with all the fresh air she’d inhaled made her stomach grumble, but when she lifted her eyes, her appetite failed as Alex Nicholson appeared on the corner of Smuggler’s Lane holding sandwiches and takeaway coffee cups, looking completely and utterly drop-dead gorgeous.

Chapter 10

For a second, Nora froze until water trickled down her arm and under the sleeve of her jumper, making her start. She dropped the cloth back into her bucket splashing water over the pavement and shook out her arm. ‘Alex?’

He gave a shy, half smile that lifted one side of his mouth. She’d always loved that lopsided grin. From memory, he didn’t always smile like that, only when he was feeling unsure of himself or the situation. When he was truly happy, his grin was full and uninhibited, lighting the whole of his face, or at least it had been like that when they were young. She suddenly wondered why he was here and if fate had landed them both back in Little Harbour at the same time for some important reason she didn’t yet know. She’d always believed in destiny because it made the crappiness of her life easier to bear. If a plan had already been laid out for her, it let her off striving for things herself. Hanging in there long enough meant fate would put her exactly where she needed to be at exactly the right time.

Crikey, he’d aged well. Time had moved on for them both and he’d filled out, losing the skinny teenage ganglyness and gaining an ardent masculinity that made bits of her tingle. Somewhere inside a deep pain tried to push its way up. There was a hint of a line on his forehead, and his dark hair was slicked back. A smattering of stubble over his jaw contrasted with his bright blue eyes that were really quite enticing. There was something of the Mr Rochester about him. She glanced at his left hand. No wedding ring. Before he could answer her greeting, Abe came to the doorway, still holding his cleaning cloth.

‘Son?’ He dropped his cloth onto the window ledge and wrapped his arms around Alex’s shoulders. ‘What are you doing here? I thought you were in York.’

‘I was. I thought I’d come down and see how you are.’

‘Right. Right.’ Abe released him and stood back scratching the back of his head. His white fluffy hair stood on end as he dropped his eyes. ‘Well, I’m fine. Just fine. Not very busy, but…’

Nora watched on, surprised at the greeting between them. What had begun so warmly was now descending into awkwardness. Their family had always been so close, but this was like watching two strangers meeting at a party and running out of things to say. She’d sensed something was up the other day when she’d spoken to Abe, but she hadn’t imagined it was this bad. How long had it been since Alex had come home? And why now?

Nora decided to step in and try to ease the tension, biting down the forgotten hurt Alex had triggered. ‘Hi Alex. I don’t know if you remember me, I’m Nora. We—’ She didn’t want to say dated in case he didn’t remember. She hoped he would, but there was always the chance he’d wiped that from his mind and had no recollection of her whatsoever which would have been beyond mortifying. Almost as bad as the time she came out from behind her reception desk and her blouse had managed to work itself open. She hadn’t even been wearing a good bra. It had been one of her old greying ones that had moulded to her body so it was incredibly comfortable but not in the least bit sexy. Too scared of being humiliated, she went with, ‘We went to school together.’

He nodded. ‘I remember you. Of course I remember you. Dad said you’d come back for a bit.’

Heat filled her chest knowing they’d been talking about her. Abe hadn’t mentioned it and she wondered exactly what had been said. ‘Yeah. I’m helping Kathryn out for a bit. Do you remember my sister?’

‘I do. I heard she split from her husband. Sorry, that’s really tough.’

She was pleased to see a genuine look of sympathy on his face, but Nora couldn’t help glancing at Abe. She hadn’t told him, so the town gossips must have, and he’d obviously then passed it on. But she wasn’t annoyed. It was one of the side effects of small-town living. Everyone knew everyone else’s business, or at least, heard about it through other people. Her family had always been the centre of town gossip. It just took some getting used to again now she was back. And as an adult she didn’t actually care what people said behind her back. Abe flushed, a bit embarrassed, but she flashed him a smile to let him know everything was fine. ‘Yeah, she’s had a rough time lately.’

Alex’s gaze lingered on Nora before he turned to his dad. Was he feeling the same strain she was? The strange mixture of hurt and excitement. ‘I bought breakfast. I thought I’d treat you. I meant to arrive a bit earlier, but I overslept. I didn’t get here till late – the traffic was murder,’ he added quickly. Abe shot Nora a look of concern at the food he’d brought. ‘What?’ Alex asked, his gaze moving between them.

The slight smile that played on Alex’s lips sent her stomach fluttering and Nora told herself to calm down. ‘We, umm…we kind of had cookies for breakfast.’

‘What?’ Alex laughed and tiny crinkles formed at the corner of his eyes. ‘Cookies? For breakfast? Mum wouldn’t have liked that.’ Nora could see he meant it as a joke, but Abe didn’t seem to take it that way. His expression became pensive before he shook it off.

‘What did you bring?’ asked Abe, peering at the load in his arms. ‘Is that a bacon sandwich I can smell?’

‘It is. And coffee. I didn’t know what you had,’ he said, turning to Nora once more. ‘So I just got you a latte, but you can swap for my cappuccino if you prefer.’

‘Latte sounds great.’ Having bought three coffees, he’d clearly known she was going to be there. Whilst she knew she couldn’t be the reason for his return, the fact that he’d brought along some breakfast for her tightened her chest. ‘And I think I could fit in a bacon sandwich.’

‘That can be our elevenses,’ said Abe, as his demeanour relaxed. ‘Let’s eat them inside then, or they’ll get cold.’

They retreated into the shop and Abe took his seat in the armchair. Nora sat on the floor with her legs crossed and Alex perched on the windowsill. It didn’t look very comfortable but there wouldn’t have been much room if he’d joined her on the floor and her body was doing enough silly things on its own without him squeezed in next to her. If a bit of her had actually touched him there was every chance she might have spontaneously combusted. Unsurprisingly, no customers came in, so they didn’t have to stop and serve. There had been a time when they’d have been busy from the moment the doors opened, even on a Monday.

As Nora enjoyed her food, she couldn’t help but glance towards Alex. The last thing she’d imagined seeing this morning was Alex Nicholson, and the reaction her body was having was unnerving. She’d thought about him on and off over the years, and the hurt he’d caused her. At times it had been overwhelming, at others it had been bearable but there all the same. A lot of her relationships had been short term because no one had made her feel the way he did, but they were two different people now. She was ten years older and she had hoped, wiser, but the knot in her stomach made her feel like a giddy schoolgirl. She decided to focus on her bacon sandwich, which was delicious, even if it did mean she’d had three breakfasts in one morning.

‘Why didn’t you say yesterday you were coming down?’ asked Abe. ‘I only phoned you last night and you never mentioned it.’

‘I meant to—’ Alex glanced over his shoulder and out towards the harbour. ‘I’ve been thinking about it for a while and then last night I just thought it was about time. It’s been too long.’ Abe didn’t answer, but Nora could tell he silently agreed. ‘When you mentioned Nora helping out with the bookshop, I wanted to pop down and help too. I’ve been trying to get you to do stuff for ages. What plans have you guys come up with?’

‘There isn’t much to do,’ Abe replied, his face clouding over. ‘Bookshops just don’t make any money anymore. We can clean everything, but it isn’t going to magic in enough people to save the place.’

‘Come on, Dad,’ said Alex. ‘While I’m here I could look at the accounts if you like? You need to think about your retirement.’

At the word retirement, Abe’s eyes shot to his takeaway coffee cup, his mouth thinly set. If Nora could see how upset he was, she hoped Alex could to.

‘Are you an accountant?’ asked Nora.

‘No, I’m a copywriter, actually. But I’m happy to look through, Dad,’ he said softly, realising his error. ‘Maybe even come to the bank with you if you want to.’

Abe responded by angrily taking a bite of his sandwich, shutting down the conversation.

Nora stepped in before Alex annoyed his dad anymore. ‘I thought we could start with a bit of a clean of the windows, just to get some more light in, and then move onto some of the bookshelves. That’ll probably be enough for today, don’t you think, Abe?’ She’d tried so hard to tread softly, but Alex’s mention of the bank had certainly had an effect. It made her wonder how bad things really were.

‘The bookshelves don’t need anything doing to them.’

Alex glanced at Nora. ‘They are a bit dusty, Dad. While you’ve got the cleaning stuff out, it probably wouldn’t hurt to give everything a once over.’

‘I suppose so,’ Abe grumbled.

‘What’s after that?’

Nora kept her eye on Abe as she was talking, trying to judge what was going on. Was he annoyed that Alex had brought up the bookshop or upset that he’d come down uninvited? The atmosphere grew awkward and tense between them and when she threw in her own mixed emotions on seeing him, this was not how she’d imagined today would go. ‘I’m not sure, really. I guess you guys will want to spend some time together.’

‘By then it’ll be lunchtime,’ Abe announced, his voice softening and his face losing some of the frustration it had before. ‘And I always close for lunch and go and have a nap.’

‘I don’t mind watching the shop for you,’ Nora said. The thought of standing behind that counter filled her with excitement and if they got a customer in it might cheer Abe up. She’d love to work in a bookshop again one day. She hadn’t managed it in London because the wages were so low and the cost of living so high, she’d have needed two other jobs just to make the rent. She didn’t particularly enjoy the job she had now but at least it meant she only had the one to drag herself too.

‘I’ll help Nora,’ Alex said. ‘I don’t mind.’

The thought of him joining her like he had when they were younger, taking every opportunity to snatch a kiss, made the blood rush to her cheeks. She knew she was blushing as Abe looked between them before shrugging.

‘Fine.’

Nora spent the rest of her time cleaning the outside and listening to Abe and Alex chat while they scrubbed the inside. At times she was glad there was a glass pane between them as if it would stop him picking up on her feelings. As the large clock on the wall counted down to one o’clock, the nerves in her stomach grew fiercer with every turn of the hands. When today had started she’d no idea she’d end up seeing her first and only real love again.

Chapter 11

Whatever Alex had been expecting it wasn’t to see Nora Bell looking so pretty. He hadn’t thought she’d be aged and wizened but he hadn’t expected something so beautiful with an open, inquisitive face and warm smile. Even though she’d tied her hair up onto her head, he could see the golden hue in the strands that had fallen to frame her face. and her skin had become even brighter and clearer than a decade before. The apples of her cheeks carried a pinkness from the crisp spring air reminding him of peaches and cream. He’d wanted to surprise her, but last night when he drove down, he had no idea that actually seeing her in person was going to affect him so much.

As he’d approached The Book Nook from the high street, walking down Smuggler’s Lane and feeling the cobbles beneath his feet, he’d heard the music. He knew it was coming from the shop, his dad had always loved classical music, but to see him so full of life, laughing and joking, pulling silly faces through the window was astounding. Had his dad been happy to see him? He’d hoped he would be, but maybe he’d left it too long and made too many excuses to expect a warmer greeting. Guilt bit at him and he determined once more to make things right with this visit.

The loving relationship they’d once had felt disappointingly out of reach right now, but maybe this trip home would bring them closer. Alex knew he had to be honest with his dad about Cassie and everything that had gone on, but the thought of letting him down, of failing like that made him recoil. He wouldn’t do it today. Now Alex was stood behind the counter while his dad took a nap and Nora, still intent on cleaning everything in sight, scrubbed one of the bookcases. It was the most peaceful he’d felt for a long time as the smell of paper perfumed the air, and the sound of leather covers being on top of each other carried towards him.

‘Dad said you’re here for a couple of weeks, is that right? I never thought I’d see the day you willingly came home to Little Harbour.’

She glanced up at him from her position on the floor. Her eyes were almond shaped and a deep, dense green. ‘Do you know, you’re about the seventy-fifth person to say that to me.’

‘Am I? Sorry. I’ll be getting it too, soon.’

She left her damp cloth and swapped it for a dry one to begin wiping the dustier books on the bottom shelf. Every time she picked one up, she treated it like it was made of glass; something precious and breakable. She’d always loved books in this peculiar way. He loved books too, but it was the creation of the story inside that inspired him most. For Nora it was the possibility of escape within the pages and sharing that love with other people, for him it was being the one to write them. After taking a moment to admire a particular book that caught her interest, reading the blurb on the back then flicking through it, she said, ‘Abe said you hadn’t come home for ages either. What brought you back?’

‘Dad,’ he said quickly. He wasn’t going to admit that a large part of it was her too. ‘I know the shop hasn’t been doing well for a while, but I’ve not managed to make it down before. The last few months have been—’ Hectic? Shitty? Diabolical? ‘—Difficult.’ He could feel Nora’s eyes on him and a sudden urge to apologise for never contacting her after he went to university took hold. He’d look like a maniac. ‘So Dad told me about your mum and dad. They’re still doing their own thing then?’

She resumed her cleaning. ‘Yep, you know them. Whatever makes them happy. But it’s fine. They can do what they like. It’s Kathryn I’m staying for.’

‘Splits are hard.’ He’d heard from his dad that Kathryn had kids. It must be even harder for her. At least he and Cassie didn’t have children together. ‘So what are your plans for the shop?’ he asked, hoping the change of subject would lighten the mood. ‘I’ve been looking at the accounts for half an hour and no matter which way I turn them it doesn’t look good.’ He moved the book around 360 degrees on the counter and Nora smiled. ‘It’s just not making enough money. Dad really needs to increase profits if he’s going to have any hope of retiring at some point. Or sell up.’

‘No!’ Nora leapt up, leaving her duster and a pile of books on the floor. ‘He can’t do that. This place has been here forever, and every town needs a bookshop. Did you know the library’s closing down?’

‘The tiny one at the other end of the high street?’

‘Yes. That means the only place to borrow books is the next town over. How ridiculous is that? There’s so much potential here. We could sell a lot more than just books. Your mum had the right idea.’

‘My mum?’ he asked, confusion drawing his brows together.

‘Yeah. Your mum had already thought about diversifying the range and had brought some wrapping paper and stationery products. It’s all out the back in the junk room. We could put some discounts on to shift this older stock and make room for it. We could redecorate, start a book club, start a lending library. There’s so much we could do.’

Alex had a feeling she was right. Since cleaning the windows that morning, they’d watched lots of people walking up and down the harbour and into town via Smuggler’s Lane. A few people had stopped and looked in the window now they could see some activity, but none came in. Maybe the place had developed a bit of a reputation. His dad wasn’t the happiest of men right now and though Alex could understand – he felt the same grief and loss himself at times – his dad needed to move forward if he wanted to save his sanity and his business. And Alex was determined to help him.

Nora came over to stare at the accounts. When she leaned forward on the counter, he could smell her perfume, and saw up close her porcelain skin. He gripped the underneath of the counter to stop himself reaching out and stroking her face. He’d never known an attraction like it. Not since the last time they were together. Since they’d lost touch, he’d put it down to youthful hormones. Had they had something stronger, bigger, deeper, and he not realised it at the time?

A tension seemed to fill the space between them as they finally stood nearer each other.

‘So,’ Nora began. ‘This place might never make gazillions of pounds but I’m sure it could make enough to let Abe save for his retirement and maybe even pay someone to help out. The man needs a day off. Surely that has to be the immediate aim?’ Alex didn’t respond and though Nora seemed hesitant at first, she carried on. ‘You mentioned retirement earlier?’

‘Yeah?’

‘Well, have you asked your dad if that’s what he wants to do?’

‘Of course I have – well, no, not exactly. Kind of.’ She narrowed her eyes on him and Alex sighed. ‘After Mum died, we talked about it, but he wasn’t really in a position to think about anything like that, so I left it.’

‘And what did he say the last time you asked?’

‘He said he didn’t know.’ Alex tapped his forefinger against the page.

‘Ah, that makes a bit more sense then.’

‘What does?’

She pulled a face at him. ‘Didn’t you notice his reaction when you mentioned it earlier? You came in and started talking like he was past it and needed to retire. Like he was already on the scrap heap.’

Alex felt his mouth drop open. He hadn’t meant to do that. If that was the way he sounded, no wonder his dad seemed to take things the wrong way. He’d never deliberately hurt his feelings, but now he thought about it he could understand how it came across.

‘Look,’ Nora splayed her hands on the counter, and he noticed how long and slender her fingers were. ‘I wanted to help out by cleaning and stuff and though I want the place to stay, we have to talk to Abe about what he wants. We can’t just go charging in and taking over. I have to go and help Kathryn this afternoon. I’m getting her some shopping. Maybe you should speak to him? I have tons of ideas of things we could do but if Abe’s going to hate me for it, it isn’t worth it.’

‘You’ve grown wise, little one,’ he replied, teasingly, relieved that despite the tension that sometimes gathered between them, he could still break through it. Her pink lips lifted into a grin. ‘Okay, why don’t I talk to Dad tonight, and we can reconvene in the morning?’

‘Good idea.’

‘Do you want to swap numbers?’ he asked tentatively, as a spark of excitement shot through him. When Nora frowned, he worried he’d gone too far.

‘Umm, yeah, we can do.’

‘It’d be good to stay in touch, don’t you think? I mean, after I’ve gone back to York and you’ve gone back to London.’

‘Yeah, that’d be nice.’

That she hadn’t said, ‘Jog on’ helped him relax and he took a deep breath ready to finally be brave and apologise for how he’d left things. ‘Nora, I—’

‘Better get back to work,’ she said quickly, dashing over to her pile of books and turning her back on him. Alex bit back the disappointment.

The afternoon went by far too quickly and another opportunity to apologise never came up. His dad filled them in on the local news and Nora left just before three. Alex watched her as Abe said goodbye. He hoped when he went back to the hotel tonight, he’d get a look like that.

‘She’s a good girl.’ Abe took his place in the armchair by the window. ‘Kind. Books are in her blood, you know? Always have been, just like words are in yours.’

If words were in his blood, Alex wished he could wrangle them into a book rather than just toothpaste sales copy. He joined his dad and sat on the windowsill. ‘Dad?’ He scratched the back of his head unsure exactly how to begin. He’d never been good at tactful. He could write and sell almost anything but sometimes the art of conversation failed him spectacularly. Never more so than when he was with his dad. His mum had always been able to decipher his meanings and relay it to Abe, but Alex had never been able to explain himself properly in front of him.

‘Yes?’

‘What do you want to do about the bookshop? I mean, do you want to keep working so hard here?’ Abe looked up, his eyebrows meeting in the middle as he frowned. ‘Do you want to sell up and go somewhere else? Do you want to close for a week and have a holiday? I just want you to be happy and you don’t seem it at the moment. I know you miss Mum—’

Something in Alex’s tone, or maybe the fact that he was here saying it face-to-face rather than over the phone, seemed to have an effect and Abe softened. ‘Ah, son. I’m tired. Very tired. I just get up and sit in this empty shop all day. But if I didn’t do that, where would I go and what would I do?’

‘You could go on an around the world cruise?’ he joked, relieved to see his dad amused.

‘I like my shop, lad, but I’ve just lost the enthusiasm for it. With no customers it can get awful lonely.’

‘Do you still get people asking you to find rare books?’

‘All the time, but I don’t take on so many now.’

‘Why?’ he asked softly.

Abe tapped on the arm of the chair. ‘It’s not the technology aspect, I can do all that well enough. It just all seems a bit pointless. On its own it’s not going to make enough money to save the shop.’

‘But you do want to save the shop?’ Alex wasn’t quite sure if the shrug his dad gave was a yes or a no. ‘If you want to stay here, Dad, then we have to do something to make it more profitable. That means—’

‘Making some changes.’ A great sigh emerged, and Alex leaned forward and took his dad’s hand. He was surprised when Abe rested his other hand on top. ‘I know that, lad, but where do you start with something as old as this? And me?’

‘Nora’s got lots of ideas. Maybe we should listen to her? You just said books are in her blood.’

‘What sort of ideas?’

‘Having a sale, redecorating a bit. Nothing major.’ Abe shuffled in his seat. ‘Don’t you want to see people coming in here again?’

Abe didn’t answer immediately and turned his gaze to the window. The afternoon sun lowered in the sky and the bright pale light of the day turned to a warmer orange hue. The shadowy outlines of seagulls flew overhead. From the very faint sound of the sea, it was low tide. Alex remembered summers climbing over the rockpools, seeing what he could find in the shallow pools of water. Even in the winter, they lived so close to the sea that they’d go regardless of the freezing temperature and when they came back, toes pink with cold, his mum would run him a bath and wrap him in a warm towel.

‘Where are you staying tonight?’

The question surprised Alex. It was like a giant olive branch he hadn’t seen coming had hit him in the face. ‘I’m staying at the Premier Inn. I knew when I set off last night I wouldn’t get here till late. It was sort of a last-minute decision and too short notice to expect to stay—’

‘What does Cassie say?’

For a second, he wanted more than anything to tell his dad the truth, getting it all out in the open so he didn’t have to carry the secret anymore, but they were just beginning to get on and he didn’t want to ruin it. He didn’t want his father to think he only came home to drop bombshells then leave again. He’d tell him in a few days. It wasn’t like anything was going to change between now and then. ‘She doesn’t mind,’ Alex replied, which was true. She didn’t care what he did anymore. ‘I’ve been overdue a trip home for ages.’

‘Why don’t you come and stay here? This is your home after all. You’re always welcome.’

‘I know that, Dad. I only stayed there because I knew I wouldn’t be arriving till late and I didn’t want to wake you up. As it was, I didn’t get here till eleven thirty and I thought you’d be in bed.’

‘I was. Sound asleep as it happens.’ Abe’s face creased as he smiled, the wrinkles becoming deeper. ‘I need my beauty sleep these days. Why don’t you go and check out of the hotel and once we’re shut, I’ll go and fetch us some fish and chips for dinner? You can have your old room. There’re a few boxes of books in there, but you can work around those, can’t you?’

‘Of course. That sounds like a great plan. I could come with you. It’d be nice to have a walk along the harbour and down the harbour arm. We could maybe stop for a pint in one of those new fancy microbreweries.’ Alex hadn’t realised how much he wanted to be here, wrapped up in the memories of his home and his family. For the first time in years, he felt that connection between them again. ‘While I go and get my stuff, shall I get us a bottle of wine to share with dinner? Do you still prefer red to white?’

‘I do. Though your mum always made me have white if we had fish. It’s what her mother taught her.’ As Abe stood, he squeezed Alex’s shoulder. ‘She’d be glad you’re here, son.’

Alex forced down the lump in his throat. The truth was, he was really glad too. Today was the first day in a long time that he’d felt genuinely happy. He hadn’t realised how much he’d missed Little Harbour, his dad, or come to think of it, Nora Bell.

Chapter 12

Nora rounded the bend and headed to Kathryn’s new home. The walk from town out towards the estate had been a pleasant one. The air was cooling now the afternoon grew darker and those noisy seagulls were finally quietening down. After being bent over, scrubbing bookshelves and dusting books, it was wonderful to get rid of the knots and kinks in her neck. She swapped the carrier bags from one hand to another as the weight of them cut into her fingers.

As she approached the front door, she could hear Kathryn telling Ozzie and Avril off for something. Her voice sounded strained and again, Nora worried about the operation. With any luck, she might be a bit more open about it now, but she still wasn’t holding her breath. She placed the bag on the step and knocked on the door. After a couple of seconds, Kathryn opened up.

Her skin was incredibly pale, and her eyes bruised with dark circles. ‘Hey,’ Nora said, pushing her worry down. Kathryn wouldn’t thank her for fussing. ‘I’ve got your shopping.’

‘Thanks. Come in.’ Kathryn bent down to pick up one of the shopping bags, but Nora quickly grabbed them. She didn’t want her lifting anything heavy.

‘No worries, I’ve got it.’ Following Kathryn through, they moved to the kitchen. It wasn’t much bigger than the one at the cottage, and the back garden was a little smaller, but it already felt like a home with the children’s things dotted around and their drawings pinned to the fridge. Avril and Ozzie were pleased to see her, even if Kathryn wasn’t overly thrilled at her presence. They ran up to try and peer into the carrier bags for sweets. Nora had been tempted to buy them some, but they weren’t on Kathryn’s list and after the last telling off, she didn’t want to risk another.

‘How was school today, kids?’ asked Nora.

‘Fine,’ Ozzie replied. ‘Avril doesn’t go to school yet. She goes to nursery.’

‘Oh, right.’ Nora waited for more, but Ozzie was too busy trying to force Avril aside to get a look in the bags. Nora lifted the bags up and put them on the counter. ‘Stop trying to see what’s there, you two, there’s nothing for you. No sweets today. They’re bad for you.’ She was met with a double groan before they gave up and went back to their games.

‘Thanks for not getting them any,’ Kathryn said sombrely. ‘The truth is, Mum used to bribe them with sweets all the time, which is fine every now and then. It’s what grandparents do, but when it’s all the time, it makes me seem like the bad guy when I say no, and they already think I’m that for kicking their dad out.’

‘I’m sure they don’t. I thought you said they didn’t know?’

Kathryn glanced over her shoulder as she began to unpack the shopping. ‘They know he’s not living here anymore, don’t they?’

‘I see what you mean, but that doesn’t mean they blame you.’

‘Well, I’m the one left here which means I’m the one who cops it. The bad tempers, the crying in the night, the strops.’ She pushed her hair back and Nora noticed a sheen of moisture on her forehead.

‘Why don’t you sit down for a minute and let me get you a glass of water.’

‘I’m fine, Nora. You don’t need to nanny me,’ Kathryn barked.

Nora took a breath, but she’d had enough of Kathryn’s snipping and snapping. ‘Kathryn, will you stop biting my head off. I’m sure you are fine. I’m sure you’re absolutely, completely capable of doing all these things all by yourself without me here to help, but I am here, and you don’t have to do everything on your own. I’m not asking you to let me take over your life, all I want to do is put your shopping away for you and get you a glass of water.’

A stand-off ensued where Kathryn and Nora stared at each other for a second, before Kathryn finally relented. With a step back, she flopped onto one of the wooden chairs at the small circular kitchen table. Yet again she seemed exhausted, and her hand subconsciously went to her stomach which was looking a little round and bloated.

‘Where’s Neil now?’ Nora asked gingerly. She didn’t want to start a row, but thought it’d be good to know in case the kids asked. She found a glass and let the tap run until it was as cold as possible.

Kathryn took the glass and drank half of it in one go. It seemed to help. ‘He’s living with his new woman.’

Nora’s mouth fell open. She’d definitely have to control herself if she saw him in the shop, which proved there was still a bond between them. ‘In town?’ Kathryn nodded. ‘What a jerk.’

‘He certainly is. Neil’s always been one of those men who wants the best of everything. The biggest house, the newest car, top of the range stuff for whatever new hobby he’d got into. Pathetic really. I didn’t realise his penchant for new things extended to a new wife and family though.’

‘Wife?’

‘I don’t think it’ll be long.’

Beneath the angry exterior, Nora saw the cracks. ‘Does the mistress have kids?’

‘Not yet, but I wouldn’t be surprised if they did have some soon. He’ll think they’ll be better versions of our two. That they won’t bicker so much or require as much work. He doesn’t realise that all kids bicker, all kids are naughty at times, and all kids are good too.’

Nora really wanted to say something to make her feel better but couldn’t think what. She didn’t know Neil that well, certainly not as well as his own wife did and what could she say that didn’t sound disingenuous. Anything she said would be tainted by the huge gap that had grown between them. Nora decided to change the subject. As she unpacked some eggs and slotted them into the tray in the fridge door, she said, ‘You’ll never guess who I saw today?’

Kathryn shrugged as she drank the remainder of the water.

‘Alex Nicholson.’

‘No way?’

‘Totally did. He turned up at the bookshop when I was there with Abe.’

Kathryn didn’t ask how she felt about it because she didn’t know how they’d lost contact when they both went to different universities. How Alex had basically ghosted her and how heartbroken she’d been at the time.

‘What’s going on with the bookshop?’ she asked. ‘Are you moonlighting there while you stay down here? I’m surprised he can pay you anything. That place has been like a crypt since Muriel died.’

Nora opened some cupboards to find the cereal. Kathryn directed her. ‘It’s true Abe’s not coped very well, but today we gave it a big clean and it’s looking better already. I’m hoping Alex will convince him about some more of my ideas too.’ She outlined all the things she thought they could do to make the bookshop popular again. To her credit, Kathryn seemed genuinely interested and Nora continued. ‘The last time I saw Alex was the day of his mum’s funeral.’

Kathryn hadn’t attended, but as Muriel was so well-liked in the town, a lot of people had sent flowers or lined the streets to watch the horse drawn carriage drive by. As Nora had discovered today during one of their conversations, Muriel had remained a lover of historical fiction and Abe and Alex had indulged her love of times gone by to have her taken to the crematorium in a horse drawn carriage, led by two beautiful black horses. Seeing had brought tears to Nora’s eyes and remembering it now, it almost did the same again.

‘The last I heard he was in York. Are you telling me he just popped down what – three hundred miles – exactly the same weekend as you?’

Nora felt heat prickle the back of her neck. ‘He might have come down before and you not know about it. It’s not like you guys are close or anything.’

‘No, but Mel knows everyone and hears everything that goes on in Little Harbour, and she always tells me.’ For once Kathryn smiled and as she did, Nora saw a glimpse of the kind older sister she’d had before The Incident. ‘And Mel hasn’t mentioned him coming down since the funeral, so he can’t have. It’s a bit much of a coincidence, if you ask me.’

‘Maybe Abe mentioned I was down and talking about helping him make changes to the bookshop and he got scared and decided to come and babysit me.’ Nora refilled Kathryn’s glass and got herself a drink of water too.

‘It’s still a long way to go just for that. And Abe isn’t senile, if he doesn’t want you to do something, he’ll let you know.’

‘Now that is true.’

Nora watched the kids playing ball in the back garden and caught Kathryn rubbing her eyes with the heel of her hand. They’d been getting on so well; would it be tempting fate to ask if Kathryn wanted her to make some dinner? Beef mince and pasta sauce were on her shopping list, so she was clearly thinking of doing bolognaise for the kids’ tea. Even Nora, who wasn’t the best of cooks, could manage that. She decided to risk it if it meant Kathryn would sit down for a little longer. After all, Nora knew full well she wouldn’t want her staying around all night and that meant Kathryn would have to bathe the kids and get them into bed.

‘Kathryn, do you want me to make up the bolognaise? You could go and have a bath or something if you like?’

‘No. No, it’s fine.’

‘I really don’t mind. You deserve a peaceful soak.’

Kathryn opened her mouth to protest but thought better of it. The suggestion of a bath seemed to have clinched it. ‘You could do dinner, but I think I’ll save the bath for later. I much prefer to have one and get straight into bed.’

‘It always feels super cosy, doesn’t it?’

‘But if you could knock up the bolognaise that would be great.’ She hesitated a moment. ‘Do you want to stay and eat with us? There’ll be plenty.’ Out of surprise, Nora didn’t answer straight away, which Kathryn took as a possible refusal. ‘If you don’t want to then—’

‘No, I do,’ Nora said quickly. ‘I really do. I’d love to.’

For the next few hours, Nora and Kathryn managed to discuss mundane day-to-day matters without snipping and snarling at each other like a couple of pack animals. Nora discussed London and her life there. For once she’d even been honest about how it hadn’t ended up how she’d hoped, though she was blessed to have met Scott. Kathryn had listened with a dreamy expression like she’d love to trade places with her, but Nora made it clear it hadn’t been all it was cracked up to be.

The reality of living in a big city had been so different to how she’d imagined. That buzz she’d experienced every time they’d had a day out there shopping with friends, had soon worn off. Nora told Kathryn about her job too and how utterly tedious that was. Kathryn had shared news of her work as a hairdresser but was guarded when it came to the time off she’d had and remained evasive as to exactly why, only talking in general terms. Nora wasn’t willing to push her luck by pressing. They’d spent an entire evening together and it had been nice. There’d been a few awkward silences but there’d also been times when they very nearly laughed together, mainly when one of the kids did something funny. Nora had even been able to get them into their pyjamas by turning it into a race. When they’d said goodbye, Kathryn had seen her out and even said a warm, genuine thank you. It was wonderful to hear. Not because she wanted Kathryn to be grateful, but because it felt like they were finally moving forward. Something Nora should have done a long time ago. The trouble was, before now, every time she thought about all the things that had happened between them the anger sparked again. It wasn’t as fierce this time and it was becoming more of a distant memory but she’d always thought coming back to Little Harbour would make it fresh and raw again. She’d been wrong.

As Nora walked back to the cottage, studying the stars that glittered above her, she was surprised to receive a text from Alex. Her heart pounded as soon as she saw his name. He’d asked if they could swap numbers so easily and she was sure he’d been about to apologise. Why had she stopped him? Perhaps because once they were over that hurdle there was every chance she’d start falling for him again. The attraction had been instantaneous. With a breath she checked the message.

‘Dad’s on board but we need to tread gently.’

Nora had to stop herself from punching the air at the thought of the changes she could make. So many more ideas to revitalise the bookshop had popped into her head she had to write them down in her notebook. She couldn’t wait to get back there tomorrow morning and start on the next item on her list, but there’d be no charging in, especially if Abe needed time to get used to things.

Before Nora could stop herself, her thoughts flew to Alex. Could she have anything to do with the fact he’d chosen this week to come down? Her pulse quickened at the thought. She’d never imagined he’d end up looking like that, all square jawed and ruggedly good looking. She wondered what it would be like to be wrapped in those muscular arms rather than the skinny ones that had held her as a teenager. Probably best not to think like that, she told herself. She was only here for two weeks to look after Kathryn. No doubt he’d be going back to York soon, and they’d be saying their goodbyes again. If she let herself feel for him, she’d be setting herself up for another heartbreak. She stared at the sky. Regardless of her best intentions something had made her heart flutter.

Chapter 13

Nora was waiting outside The Book Nook, bouncing up and down on her toes, when Alex opened the door at nine the next morning. In the background, she could see Abe hiding behind the counter pensively running his fingers over the countertop.

Her heart gave a double beat as Alex caught her eye, but she was certain it was excitement over starting some real plans for putting the bookshop back on its feet. She’d hardly been able to sleep the night before as exhilaration and trepidation coursed through her veins. What Nora was doing now was the most exciting career move she’d ever made. She’d never felt this way about any job in London, or any plan she’d made while living there.

As soon as the door squeaked open enough for her to get through, Nora darted inside, her notebook clutched tightly to her chest. She felt sixteen again, rushing in the same way she had back then. Every time she arrived for a shift it felt like she was escaping, ending up in a peaceful, calm place where she was meant to be. The old shop still hadn’t lost its charms, as serenity seeped into her bones. A little voice in her head told her she couldn’t afford to get as attached as she had then. It would be too painful. With a deep breath, Nora focussed on the task at hand.

The shop was still brighter for them having cleaned the windows, but the dull lighting inside made it dreary. The rich but dark wood of the bookshelves swallowed whatever daylight got in and you had to wait a moment for your eyes to adjust as you left the bright spring sunshine outside. This would never do. It didn’t create a lively, friendly atmosphere. The place felt like something from a bygone era and not in a we-love-vintage way, but in an I-haven’t-redecorated-since-1970 way. As she looked around with a more critical eye, she could imagine the dark bookshelves painted in all different colours. The Kids’ Section could be bright red, yellow and blue, the adult bookshelves could be more pastel colours. Maybe blue and white striped to have a more nautical theme? Yes! That would look great, but it would clash with the Kids’ Section. Nora pictured it all once more, and in her mind, the nautical theme won out. She hastily opened her notebook and using the pretty bright blue pen she kept attached to the cover wrote a note.

From over the top of the book she caught sight of Alex, turning his head this way and that, trying to get her attention. ‘Morning,’ he said with a spectacularly sexy grin.

‘Hi.’ She pushed her hair back behind her ear. She’d left it down but had a band on her wrist in case she needed to tie it back. She wasn’t sure exactly how things were going to work out today or what they’d be doing. All she knew was Abe was on board with doing more to the shop, but what that was, she’d have to wait and see. Her plan was just to lay out her ideas and see which ones he liked. She had a horrible feeling there weren’t going to be many. ‘Morning, Abe,’ she called over Alex’s shoulder, keeping her voice light and some of her excitement at bay.

‘Hello, flower.’ She could tell he was nervous from the way he gently moved his hand in a semi-circular wave but didn’t offer anything more. After a second, he said, ‘I’ve made tea for us all. Alex said he thought you’d be here at nine on the dot.’

Nora cast a glance at him. ‘Did he now?’

‘Oh, yes. He said you’d be raring to go.’

‘I am.’ Nora flashed her eyes at him but remembered to tread carefully. ‘I thought we could have a sit down and chat about some of my ideas and see what you like, Abe. How does that sound?’ She wanted him to know that though she’d had a lot of thoughts, she wasn’t going to pressure him into anything. It seemed to help a little as Abe’s shoulders relaxed down from where they’d been nestling under his ears.

‘Sounds like a good idea to me.’

‘Alex? You ready?’ she asked. After yesterday afternoon, he’d been keen on helping too. She just hoped he still wanted to and hadn’t taken one look at her now and decided he’d dodged a bullet all those years ago. She didn’t think so, but the situation was proving difficult to read.

He lifted his cup to his lips. After having a sip, he said, ‘Ready.’

Whether it was from the dim light or having had a decent night’s sleep, he already looked like a weight had lifted from him. His brow was less creased in consternation and the skin around his eyes had relaxed. He was wearing a bright blue T-shirt, the same colour she wanted to paint some of the bookshelves, which showed off surprisingly toned arms and a broad chest. She wondered if he had any hair on his torso, dark and a little curly like his head. What would it be like to run her fingers over it as she lay in bed nestled into his neck? Feeling the heat mounting in her cheeks she grabbed her tea, pulled her notebook against her and went to the same spot on the floor she’d sat in the previous day. Alex and Abe joined her, Abe taking the armchair and Alex perching on the windowsill.

‘We can’t sit like this all the time,’ said Abe. ‘You’ll get a bad back, Alex. Why don’t you nip upstairs and get the armchair that matches this one and the foot stool?’

Alex nodded and did as he was told, returning a few moments later. Though he offered the second armchair to Nora, she was too full of energy and excitement to sit in it and relax and opted instead for perching on the footstool.

‘So,’ Abe began gingerly. ‘What have you got in store for me?’

Nora cocked her head and tried to decipher his tone before diving into her list. ‘So, the first thing I thought was we could paint the bookshelves. Even though we cleaned the windows it’s still really dark in here. Do we need to change the lightbulbs too?’ She looked up at them. They were shaped like old fisherman’s lanterns and fitted so well that Nora was determined to keep them, they just needed brighter bulbs.

‘It does seem rather dark in here,’ Alex added. ‘Have you changed them recently, Dad?’

‘I just used whatever ones I could find.’

‘Okay, well, Abe, do you fancy checking the lights and getting new bulbs if required?’ He nodded. ‘Great.’ She made a note in her book. Ticking off one of the things on her list and writing Abe’s name next to it. Alex peered over, then he and Abe shared a glance. ‘What?’ Nora asked.

‘Nothing,’ replied Alex.

‘You just look so happy, flower,’ said Abe. ‘It’s nice to see. You didn’t look like that when you walked in the other day.’

‘I didn’t feel like it either,’ she said without thinking. She carried on outlining her plan for painting the outside of the bookshelves white and the shelves themselves alternately blue and white to create a stripe effect. To her surprise, Abe nodded enthusiastically.

‘Yes, that’s a nice idea.’

‘It is,’ said Alex. ‘Great thinking.’

‘Thank you. So, Alex, if I make a note of the type of colours, can you go and get them? I think a blue the same colour as your T-shirt would be great and a nice bright white.’

‘Okay sure.’ He looked down at his top as if he didn’t realise he was wearing a blue one.

Nora tapped the pen against her lip, thinking of anything else they might need before they started work. ‘We’ll need paintbrushes too. And dustsheets. Then once we’ve got this room decorated, we need to talk about the junk room.’ At this Abe shifted a little in his seat. ‘It’s such a great size room,’ Nora began. ‘It would be wonderful to have it as either a kids room, or I had this amazing idea.’ In her excitement, she shuffled even further to the edge of her seat until her body fell out from underneath her. Her stomach lurched as she met the floor with an ungainly oomph.

‘Nora!’ Alex exclaimed, reaching forwards and helping her back up. ‘Are you okay?’

How embarrassing. ‘Yes, yes, I’m fine. Or I would be if Abe stopped laughing.’

Abe was indeed laughing so much he was virtually bent double and in danger of spilling his tea. ‘Oh, flower! Oh, flower, that was precious. Oh, my dear me.’ He sat back, straightening up and pressing a hand to his heart. ‘I haven’t laughed that much in ages.’

‘Well, I’m very glad I could entertain you,’ Nora replied, smiling. She lifted herself back onto the seat a little more securely this time and pretended to be offended. In reality, she was happy to see him laughing but she wished it hadn’t happened in front of Alex. ‘Anyway, I’ve been thinking about how we can use the junk room more effectively. It’s too big to be used as a storage room, so I thought we could clear the boxes of wrapping paper and store them somewhere else—’

‘There’s only the flat, though, flower,’ Abe replied, finally calming down.

‘But we could use my old room, couldn’t we?’ Alex interrupted. ‘We might not get all the boxes in there, but we can try and condense it all down. I don’t mind living with a few while I’m here if it helps the shop.’

His use of the phrase while I’m here dampened Nora’s mood slightly knowing he’d be leaving again at some point, but choosing not to dwell, she carried on. ‘Once we’ve unpacked it all and really seen what’s there, we might be able to get a lot of it in the shop. I was thinking we could use this space here—’ She darted to a small gap between one of the bookshelves and the wall. ‘And this one here—’ Nora was off to the other side of the shop to point while Alex and Abe’s eyes followed her. ‘To display some of the wrapping paper, cards and stuff. So we’ll need lots of hooks, Alex too. And a drill. Then that leaves the boxes of books, but if we have a sale, it could clear a lot of the ones that have got sun damaged and restock with the ones from the junk room. Once the room’s clear we can move the kid’s books into there and have a whole new space for them instead of just a small bookshelf. And I thought, with the little library closing, what about a reading corner too?’

Alex held an arm out to pause her. ‘But won’t people then read for free instead of buying the books?’

‘I don’t think anyone has the cheek to just sit in a bookshop all day, reading a book and then not buy anything. Plus, if you come into a bookshop, it’s because you love books and you want to buy them. Even if someone reads for a bit, I bet they won’t leave without buying something. I always buy a book when I go into a bookshop, even if I wasn’t after one in the first place.’

‘You used to do that here,’ said Alex. His eyes glazed as he seemed to think back to their shared past. A shot of pain and annoyance flared. It needn’t have been their past if he’d stayed in contact with her, it could have been their present too. As much as she tried to ignore her feelings, she needed closure. She couldn’t let it go until she knew he was sorry for what he’d done.

‘That’s true,’ Abe agreed. ‘On pay day you’d always go home with at least one new book, wouldn’t you, flower? It was like you couldn’t help yourself.’

‘Once a book person, always a book person,’ she replied. ‘And then there’s the rare books service.’

‘Don’t tell me you think we should stop it,’ said Abe, his voice tightening.

‘No! Definitely not! I just think we should move it online. At the moment, you rely on word of mouth, don’t you? But that doesn’t really get you very far in the age of online searches. I think we need to have a dedicated section on your website and maybe list you in lots of other places too. Perhaps we could move the computer upstairs or get you a nice little laptop that can go on the counter. That old thing you’ve got down here takes up so much space which we could use to display more of the wrapping paper Muriel bought. I mean, ideally—’ Nora paused, knowing she was beginning to tread on delicate ground. ‘Abe, that was the bit you always liked most, wasn’t it?’ Abe nodded, clearly suspicious of where this conversation was going. ‘So, I mean…I thought we should aim for you making the sort of money that means you could hire someone to work in the shop, leaving you to do that. You’d get more freedom to work the hours you want, and it was always very profitable, wasn’t it?’

‘Oh, yes.’ From the light that came on in his eyes, Nora could tell she’d hit upon a great idea. ‘That’s how we could afford to start a bookshop in the first place. Rare books can be worth thousands – hundreds of thousands even – and we’d get commission on every sale. It’s just time consuming, doing all the searches and sometimes you have to go and look at the edition and make sure it’s up to snuff.’ As he talked, Nora could see a vague excitement growing under the surface.

‘Would you like to do that again, Dad?’ Alex asked. ‘Focus more on the rare books and leave the day-to-day bookshop stuff to someone else?’

Nora bit her lip. She loved the day-to-day bookshop stuff. She loved cleaning the bookshelves, dusting the book covers, arranging displays, wrapping people’s purchases for them. She loved talking to customers and finding out about them, and if they went with her idea of converting the junk room into a reading room, this place would be like a dream to work in. Any book-loving person would be lucky to spend their days at The Book Nook. There’d be people to chat to and help them find their perfect choice so they left with something they didn’t even know they needed. And with the Kids’ Corner, they could have story-times, baby rhyme-time, even after-school clubs and workshops and talks and puppet shows! What could be better than helping children discover a love of books that would stay with them their whole life? If only this was an option for her, she thought, holding back the tidal wave of emotion that threatened to drown her. This would be the perfect job – her perfect job – but she had a life in London, a flat she shared with her best friend and no intention of staying in Little Harbour with a sister who didn’t trust her and parents who sold the family home on a whim. It would be the perfect job for someone, only that person wasn’t her.

‘Do you know, I like that idea very much, flower,’ said Abe. ‘I could even work from the flat, couldn’t I? I’ve got a lovely little desk by the big window in the front room. That would be a perfect spot.’

Alex smiled lovingly at his dad then transferred his gaze to Nora. ‘What else have you got up your sleeve, Nor?’

He hadn’t called her Nor for such a long time but the way it rolled off his tongue made her ribs constrict. The last time she’d heard it, he’d been holding her tightly, whispering it into her ear as they said goodbye for the last time. I’ll never forget you, Nor. Had been his exact words. And then he had forgotten her. Had he planned then not to contact her again? She’d cried after that, but her family told her she’d get over it soon enough, and she’d believed them. Then university had drawn her attention away from her heartache and as the pain faded and her life became fuller, she had healed somewhat. She couldn’t help but wonder now, hearing him say her name again, if it had been a mistake. ‘Umm…’ She read from her list. ‘Okay, so how do you feel about starting a book club, Abe?’

‘Me?’

‘Yes, you. You’ve read so many books and you know so much about them and different authors. You could meet once a month to discuss a book of your choice.’

‘What would we read?’ From the nervousness in his voice Nora could tell he wasn’t quite sure of this idea. Maybe because it meant putting himself out there and meeting people.

‘Anything you like. You could get the members to choose, pick old classics or latest releases. It’d be up to you.’

He turned to his son. ‘Alex, what do you think?’

Stunned his dad had asked him, he paused for a second, considering. ‘I think it’s really good idea. You could hold it in the pub, it doesn’t have to be anything formal. It could be really relaxed and social. No one’s expecting you to hold court and act like an English professor.’

‘I’ll think about it,’ Abe said. ‘Anything else, flower?’

She had thought it was time for an update to the name but wasn’t exactly sure what yet, and until she was, it wasn’t worth mentioning. ‘The only other thing I thought was doing a sort of grand re-opening. That would really get everyone’s attention. And we should do some marketing to get the name of the place out there a bit more and let people know that we’re still here.’

‘I can do the website,’ Alex said with a shrug. ‘I am a copywriter after all.’

‘Oh,’ said Abe, cradling his cup in his lap. ‘How’s the toothpaste coming on?’

‘Toothpaste?’ Nora replied with a laugh.

Alex shook his head. ‘I’ll tell you everything later, Dad, but not well.’ He turned to Nora. ‘I’ve got to write copy for a new brand of toothpaste and I’ve no idea what to write that hasn’t been said a thousand times before.’

‘Every story has been told a thousand times before, it’s a writer’s unique take on it that makes it different.’

Their eyes met and there was no denying there was something between them, just as there had been all those years ago. This time, it was even more intense, if that was at all possible. He nodded. ‘You’re right.’

She found it hard to pull her eyes away from his, but with Abe watching on, she cleared her throat. ‘Anyway, if we update the website, get onto social media and all that, and maybe start a book group, it should really help make us a part of the community again. We don’t even need to close until the grand re-opening.’

‘Why? Because we don’t get many customers?’ Abe said sadly.

Nora realised she’d charged ahead in her enthusiasm and hurt his feelings again. Maybe Kathryn had a point. ‘No, not at all,’ she replied quickly, recovering as best she could. ‘Lots of places stay open while they’re making changes, it’s not unusual and…’ She was completely making it up now. ‘And it’s good for people to see. It gets them interested, starts them talking again.’ She breathed out, confident she’d done a fairly good job of getting her foot out of her mouth. ‘What do you think, Abe?’

As Abe turned away to look out of the window, she realised she had to start detaching herself from all this. She was only making her return to London even harder. Abe stared out of the window, and Nora worried that she’d done exactly what she didn’t want to do and had steamrollered in, crushing his feelings in her path. He’d seemed so excited about some of her ideas, he couldn’t say no. Could he? She sucked in a breath and waited for him to speak.

A big fat pigeon flew past the window, pursued by an even larger seagull. Their squawking echoed in the silent shop and Abe cleared his throat before turning to face her. ‘No.’

Chapter 14

‘N–no?’ Nora asked, feeling her heart crumple inside her chest. She spoke regardless of the tightness in her throat, forcing the words out. Her voice wavered as disappointment hit hard. ‘What ideas didn’t you like?’

‘It’s not that I don’t like your ideas, flower. It’s just that that’s quite a big list and you’ll be gone in just under two weeks. I’m only one man and if you set all of this up, I’m not going to be able to carry it all on once you’re gone.’ The sadness in his tone hit her like a punch to her stomach, as did the tiredness in his eyes. ‘Muriel would have been very proud of you – both of you – but it’s a lot for an old man like me to take on.’

‘We don’t have to do it all,’ Nora added. ‘We could just pick and choose some of the ideas and see how they go.’

Alex leaned forwards. ‘Was there anything in particular you weren’t sure of?’

‘Well,’ said Abe, glancing at Nora. She was too devastated to raise her head and meet his gaze. ‘I think the book group is a bit much and I’m not one hundred percent on the reading corner idea. I mean, I agree with you Nora that if you come into a bookshop, it’s because you love books and if you love books, you’re probably going to buy one. But we do get some people in this town who’ll take advantage.’

‘I think we realise that,’ said Alex, ‘but there won’t be many people like that. I think the benefit would certainly outweigh the effort.’

Abe continued with his objections and though Nora wanted to run away and have a good cry, she stayed put. Tackling his fears head on would mean they could find the solutions that were right for him because he was right, she would be gone soon and couldn’t expect to set everything up and him just make it happen on his own, once she’d left. Was she getting in too deep? Should she scrap it all and spend the time reading and relaxing? The thought didn’t sit well with her and deep down she knew that if she didn’t, and then came back in six months’ time and Abe had been forced to sell up and live somewhere else, his memories of Muriel fading, he’d feel even more desolate, and she’d feel guilty for not trying harder now.

‘And how do I run a book group? I don’t know how to do that? And it means organising food and drink and what questions to ask them and what happens if no one’s read it?’ Nora glanced at Alex. They shared a look of concern but let Abe continue. ‘And you said about hiring someone—’

‘Only when you can afford to, Abe. And if you want to.’

‘How do I do that? I don’t know how to interview anyone. Muriel did all that sort of thing and as you were the last person we hired, I don’t know if what she asked would even be relevant nowadays.’

‘Abe,’ Nora said gently, leaning forwards and laying her hand on top of his, but before she could say anymore, he stood up.

‘I think I’ll go for a walk.’

With that he headed for the door and left without even taking his coat.

Nora shuffled back onto the footstool, leaning her head on her hands. ‘Well, that went well, didn’t it?’

‘I can’t believe Dad reacted like that. Last night he seemed so relaxed, so on board with everything.’

‘It’s my fault. I didn’t tread gently enough.’

‘Yes, you did.’ Alex bent forwards and rested his arms on his thighs. ‘Okay, so you got a bit enthusiastic, but you weren’t ever insensitive. I saw you watching him all the time, checking he was okay. You couldn’t have done more. I should have known when Dad says he’s okay, he doesn’t always mean it. He’s obviously got cold feet since last night.’

‘What do we do now?’ asked Nora, eyeing her notebook that lay open beside her. She was tempted to tear the page out as the situation seemed so hopeless, but she’d never been one to give up easily. Fate had brought her back here. It had brought Alex back here too and that meant something was destined to happen. They just needed to wait until Abe came back on board. There were some ideas he’d liked, and he hadn’t said anything about not painting. His reservations about the other things could easily be put to rest. She could help him interview someone when the time came, though the thought of it not being her stung, and she could help write questions for the book club from London once she knew what they’d chosen. Some books even came with questions in the back these days. Nora rolled her shoulders. ‘Shall we have a cup of tea while we wait for your dad?’

‘Sure. Are you okay?’ Alex asked, standing up.

‘I’m fine. We just need to wait, then we’ll try and work through his objections letting him know all the support we can give.’

‘Wow, Nora Bell. Just wow.’ He smiled, his eyes wide.

‘What?’ She half-laughed at his incredulous expression.

‘You’re pretty amazing, you know that?’

People never called her amazing, and that Alex had said it sent a tingle down her back. ‘I’ll make the tea. You take care of the shop.’

An hour later, when Nora had bitten her fingernails down to the quick, Abe returned. He didn’t seem that cold so he must have gone somewhere specific, or perhaps he’d been walking at such a pace he hadn’t felt the chill in the air. His expression was grave and Nora readied to be sent packing. Though Abe would no doubt do it kindly, the set of his jaw told her it wasn’t going to be good news.

Alex moved around the counter. ‘Are you all right, Dad?’

‘Hmm?’ Abe glanced over his shoulder as he walked further into the shop. He peered around as if seeing the place through new eyes. The atmosphere seemed full of not only dust, but tension. It seemed her hopes and dreams were teetering on a knife edge and when Abe spoke he’d be making the decision about where the knife would fall, where her life would head next. She reminded herself that no matter he said, she’d be heading back to London soon.

‘I asked if you were all right.’

‘Me? Yes. Just needed some fresh air. Don’t look so scared, flower,’ he said, resting his hand on her shoulder. ‘I’m okay.’

‘I’m sorry I upset you, Abe. We don’t have to do any of it if you don’t want to. I just wanted to help you keep your lovely bookshop but if I got carried away then I’m sorry. Kathryn tells me I’m always charging in.’

He studied her face, a kindness in his eyes. Then he looked to one of the fisherman’s lights above. ‘That bulb does need changing, doesn’t it? Now, I’ve had a think about it and I think Muriel would like your ideas very much, flower. When do we start?’

Chapter 15

Using his T-shirt as a guide, Alex found the paint and got back to the shop as quickly as possible. Nora’s enthusiasm was infectious, even reaching his dad in the end and after the blip this morning, Abe was becoming more and more positive towards her ideas. The effect Nora had on him was remarkable.

As Alex made his way down Smuggler’s Lane, arms laden with everything they needed for the day’s work, he found himself relaxing. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d walked down the street humming to himself. He’d felt so covered in gloom lately. Knowing the door wasn’t locked, he leaned his back against it, nudging it open with his bum. When he turned around it was to hear Abe banging around upstairs and Nora clearing one of the bookshelves ready to paint it. She ferried books to the other side of the shop, stacking them up underneath the harbour window. He liked her colour scheme of blue and white and, being so near the sea, he wondered why they’d never thought of it before. It had given him an idea too.

‘Hey, Nora, I was thinking that once we’ve finished renovating in here, we should re-paint the outside too. Maybe have a new blue and white sign done? What do you think?’

She glanced over her shoulder at him, smiling, but didn’t stop working. ‘That’s a great idea. We’ll have to double check with your dad, but I think it could look fantastic. We want the whole town to know we’ve got a new lease of life and what better way than to have a new sign? We probably won’t be able to do it before the re-opening, but I don’t think it’ll matter. Great thinking, Alex.’ She grabbed her notebook and added it to her huge list.

Alex loved that she was saying we. She was so involved in his dad’s life – in the life of the shop. Would Cassie have been like that had things been different? When he thought back to their romance it had been a whirlwind. They’d met at a club one Friday night when his mate had accidentally knocked his drink over and ruined her dress. Desperate to keep talking to her, Alex had offered to pay for it to be dry cleaned. They’d exchanged numbers and from the very next day when he’d gone to collect the dress, they’d hit it off. She’d been hungover, but still so incredibly pretty and at the time it had felt so right.

That was six months before his mum had died. They’d had no idea that she had blocked arteries. She was as thin as a rake and never put on weight. As far as they knew, she was in the best of health, always happy and never ill. Then one day she got out of bed and collapsed onto the floor. She’d been dead by the time his dad had rounded to her side of the room. A shudder flew down Alex’s spine thinking of Abe going through it and remembering how he’d described it on the phone when he informed Alex his mum was dead. Alex wondered how he would feel if that was him watching the love of his life die before his eyes. He couldn’t even imagine the state his dad must have been in. Unlike Nora’s parents, his mum and dad had been utterly devoted to each other from the moment they’d met. Maybe that was why he’d thought the same would happen for him and Cassie.

Now the ugly scene was in his head, Alex found it hard to shake. His writer’s imagination kicked in, showing him the images like a movie playing out. His dad’s panic-stricken face, frozen in fright before adrenalin pumped as he lunged towards her. Alex could feel his heart racing, his body reacting to the very real scenes in his mind. Maybe that was why he’d pulled away from his dad in the month’s following the funeral. Sometimes Alex’s own grief had been overwhelming and when he tried to sleep, he imagined his dad’s pain. The idea he had withdrawn when his father needed him most filled him with an unbearable shame. Yes, he’d called often in the weeks after his mum’s death and after the funeral, but those calls grew shorter and with more time between as his own life had spiralled out of control.

When the immediate anguish had worn off, the fragility of life had frightened him into impetuousness. In an effort to grab hold of this strange, tenuous, finite existence, he’d swept Cassie off to Vegas, and really, now he came to think of it, that had been the beginning of the end. That, and the Elvis impersonator.

‘Right, let’s get started,’ Nora said, her voice ringing with enthusiasm. It cut through the cocoon of memory he’d wrapped himself in and brought him back to the present with a crash. Quite literally a crash as, without looking where he was going, he stumbled and dropped the cans of paint. Dustsheets and paint trays flew all over the floor and both he and Nora gasped in panic. Luckily, the lid stayed on the cans.

‘Oh, damn! Sorry,’ he exclaimed, scrabbling around trying to gather everything up. ‘I was miles away.’

Nora stopped stacking the books and brushed her hair back from her face. ‘That was close. I don’t know where you’d gone in your head, but I hope it was nice.’ He must have scowled without realising as she said, ‘Everything okay? I was only joking.’

‘Yes, fine. Just thinking.’ He wasn’t about to admit what he’d been dwelling on. He hadn’t even told his dad about him and Cassie yet. Luckily, their conversations had been so focussed on the bookshop he’d been able to avoid the subject, but he knew he had to tell him about the break-up soon.

‘Toothpaste?’ Nora asked with a twinkle in her eye.

He laughed. ‘Not this time, but I can’t put it off forever. My deadline’s tomorrow. Where’s Dad?’

‘He got quite excited about the idea of setting up a workstation upstairs and has gone off to sort out the living room.’

‘Really? He hasn’t touched up there since Mum died.’ They shared a moment of happiness for Abe. ‘Shall we get started then?’

Alex and Nora spread out a dustsheet and began painting one of the bookcases. Alex took the shelves while Nora worked on the carcass. They settled into a comfortable rhythm sharing jokes and memories, but before long, Alex wanted to know more about Nora and how her life had turned out. He wondered if she had a husband waiting for her back in London. She hadn’t mentioned anything or anyone of significance but then given the secrets he was keeping, he couldn’t really criticise. Also, it hadn’t exactly come up in conversation. Now seemed to be the ideal chance with his dad out of the way.

‘So what have you been up to for the past ten years, Nora?’

She didn’t look up but focussed on making even brushstrokes. ‘You want a potted history?’

‘I do. What has the great Nora Bell done with herself.’

Her face clouded. ‘Nothing great, I’m afraid, and even more sadly, the ten years will take approximately thirty seconds to describe to you.’ As she worked from the top of the bookcase to the bottom, she knelt down. She looked cute, her hair scraped back into a ponytail, her eyes narrowed in concentration. ‘As you know I was desperate to get away from here and go to university and when I finished, I just couldn’t face coming back so I took the first job in London I could find. I eventually started working at a huge legal firm called Maxwell and Staunton’s.’

‘Sounds fancy,’ he said, trying to lighten the mood.

‘It’s not.’ She cocked her head to one side, tapping the end of the brush against her lip assessing her work. ‘Well, the job isn’t but the office is. Some of the people who work there are super fancy, but I’ve never quite made the grade. That’s where I met Scott, my flatmate.’

‘Scott?’ He wondered if there was more to her relationship than she was letting on. He was bound to be handsome and successful, and Alex felt a stab in his chest like jealousy.

‘Yeah, he’s the best, and his boyfriend works at Selfridges and lets me use his staff discount, so I’ve been really lucky in that department. Not that I can afford anything in Burberry or Chanel.’

So he wasn’t her boyfriend but that didn’t mean she didn’t have one. He’d have to keep questioning. ‘What do you do at Maxwell and Staunton’s?’

‘I’m a receptionist.’

‘Huh.’

‘What?’ Nora narrowed her eyes, and Alex felt a sudden flush on his neck

‘Nothing bad! I’m a copywriter for God’s sake. I can’t judge anyone. I guess I just always thought you’d end up working in a bookshop. You seemed to love it here so much I always thought you’d do something in publishing.’

‘So did I. I knew I wouldn’t walk into my ideal job straight away, but I thought eventually something awesome would happen if I hung in there long enough. I’ve always thought fate puts you where you need to be and with London being so big and busy, I thought I’d find that elusive job if I stuck it there long enough, but it’s not happened yet.’ Her voice rang with sadness. ‘What about you? What have you been up to for the last ten years? You stayed in York after your degree then?’

This time he was definitely going to apologise for the way things ended. All he had to do was bring the conversation round to it. ‘Yeah, I kind of fell in love with the city. It’s an amazing, beautiful place.’

‘It sounds like you miss it already.’

‘I do a bit, but I’m glad to be here,’ he added quickly. Now was his chance. ‘That reminds me of something.’

‘What? It isn’t something embarrassing I did, is it?’

‘Not this time. Do you remember when we were discussing universities?’

From the way she tilted her head, he knew she’d understood the memory he was referring to. ‘Ah, yes. I was so set on London I picked a course based on the universities there whereas you didn’t care where you went as long as they had the exact syllabus.’

Alex paused, remembering the times they sat at the end of the harbour arm watching the boats bob around the marina over the endless sea discussing all that life had in store for them.

‘You were all about the learning,’ she mused.

‘And you were all about the social life,’ he teased in return.

‘Yeah, and look where that got me.’ He was just about to open his mouth when after a second of reflection and Alex sensed, sorrow, Nora said, ‘Why did you get into copywriting?’

‘Money, of course.’

Like most people, he’d enjoyed the subjects he’d studied at university, but it didn’t seem to translate all that well when he entered the world of work. After uni, he was competing with people with years of experience and had to take what he could get. ‘I just fell into it by accident, but turns out, I have a bit of a knack for it.’

‘Except for toothpaste.’

He couldn’t believe Nora still had the same cheeky sense of humour that popped out when you least expected it. She had a talent for lightening the mood and had always been a blast at parties. Because she loved to read, people often thought she’d been bookish and shy, but Nora was outgoing and confident and had a warm personality that drew you in. ‘This toothpaste is going to be the death of me. I mean, how can I find a new angle when everything sounds cliché and has been used before.’

He felt the moment slipping away and didn’t know how to bring it back without sounding like a weirdo.

‘Maybe you need a different approach?’ The question knocked him and for a while he wasn’t sure what to say. When Nora continued speaking, he was grateful for a moment to think. ‘I remember you were always writing stories when we were…’ She faltered as the words when we were together hung in the air but recovered swiftly. ‘When we were young.’

It was so odd that they were such strangers now but had this shared history; a binding connection that would forever make each a part of each other. Yet it was nothing more than a memory. A vivid one, he realised as his heart beat harder remembering their time together. She’d been his first and he, hers. It had been a wonderful experience. When other lads had recounted their first times, they’d sounded hideous. He remembered holding her in his arms then. What would it be like to hold her now? She was the same and yet so different and he couldn’t face bringing up such hurtful memories and trying to excuse his cowardly behaviour when things were going so well. ‘So how’s Kathryn doing?’

‘Okay, I think. She doesn’t talk to me much, but then, you know how my family are.’

A face appeared at the harbour window, startling them both and interrupting their conversation. Alex didn’t recognise who it was until Nora said, ‘Oh, it’s Mel from the pub.’ Mel’s hand shielded her eyes from the sun as she peered in. Nora waved even though the sneer on Mel’s face told them she was unlikely to receive anything pleasant in return. ‘Do you remember her? She went to school with Kathryn.’

‘Kind of.’ Alex waved as well.

Mel stepped back and walked out of view.

‘Do you still write, Alex?’ Nora asked once they were alone again.

A sudden choice was before him, and Alex knew he had to think very carefully about what he said. Telling her the truth of his dreams to become a writer felt like such a huge step given that they were only just rediscovering their friendship. Plus, it wasn’t something he’d confided in anyone. Even Cassie hadn’t known the full extent of his hopes and dreams. With Nora watching him, her green eyes bright like the stems of the daffodils outside, he wanted to tell her. She loved books and words as much as he did and instinctively, he knew she wouldn’t laugh at him. Cassie had never outright said it was childish, but when he’d taken the plunge and hinted at it, she’d said things like, ‘But it’s not a proper job, is it?’ Inwardly, he sighed. He should have listened to all these indications of their incompatibility.

‘Alex?’ Nora prompted, her voice tightening with concern. ‘Are you okay? You’re doing it again, going off into that other world.’

He rested the paintbrush on top of the pot of paint and picked up a book from the stack on the floor near him. ‘I haven’t written a story in years.’ Saying it out loud filled him with misery. ‘To be honest, I’d love to be a novelist and have my words on a page and my name on a cover but life kind of got in the way.’

‘It does that, doesn’t it?’

Filled with exhilaration at having told the truth, he was eager to continue but though she’d been kind and understanding, he didn’t quite feel ready to mention that he often sat down and tried to write only to give up when the words wouldn’t come. He wasn’t ready to tell her that ideas often bubbled in his head and that the plot for his book had been gathering strength in his brain for years, but still he couldn’t make it into a tangible thing. It made him feel like a failure and he didn’t want Nora to think him that.

‘But stories are important, you know,’ she said. ‘Now more than ever. I remember you wrote a story about a cat detective. I thought it was amazing. You were always very gifted.’ It was a throw away comment, but Alex’s confidence soared. If he’d had a computer in front of him, even a pen and paper, he’d have started writing straight away. ‘If you enjoy it, you should do it. Why don’t you try that approach with your advert?’

‘A story?’ Now there was a thought. In fact, that was a really good idea. Instead of trying to say the same thing every toothpaste add said why not share a story about how having a brighter smile has made someone happier, more confident? ‘That’s a great idea, Nor.’ She beamed at him and the way it brightened her face started something deep inside.

As if by some kind of unbelievable word-filled magic, the first line of his novel popped into his brain and before he could forget it, he grabbed a scrap of paper and wrote. The pen wouldn’t move fast enough as he tried to get it down. As he finally placed the full stop, the urge to start tinkering and improving it filled him, but he pushed it away. He had to learn to get the words on the page – all the words on all the pages – before the critical side of himself appeared. For now, this would do fine. For now, this might even be enough to rally his creative side into surfacing. Maybe tonight he’d take his notepad and walk the harbour, imagining the rest of the scene, letting it play out in his head. That first sentence had already unleashed a flood and the characters he’d imagined for so long were beginning to act like real people, doing and saying things in his head.

‘What are you doing?’ Nora asked, a slight giggle in her voice.

‘You just gave me a great idea and I needed to write it down before I forget.’

‘Can I see?’ she asked resting her paintbrush and edging over to him.

‘No!’ Quickly, he folded the piece of paper and thrust it deep into the pocket of his jeans, but she didn’t look offended. ‘It’s secret.’

‘Do I have to wait for the advert to come out?’

The novel, he thought with a smile. He wasn’t quite ready to say the words out loud, but he was a giant step closer to being able to start writing the damn thing.

Chapter 16

When Alex’s voice penetrated her thoughts Thursday morning in the shop, Nora realised she’d been doing the same thing she used to do as a teenager. She’d been holding a copy of Wolf Hall and had lost herself in reminiscence of the story. She could picture it all in her mind’s eye, the characters real, the halls they walked clear in her thoughts, the atmosphere seeping into her bones where she stood in a different time and location. The magic of books still surprised her.

For the last few days, they’d worked in harmony, finishing the bookcases, cleaning and tidying, re-arranging the books. Instead of the alphabetical order the authors had always been in, Nora copied the layout of other bookshops with a table of new releases near the front. Not that there were many. Abe clearly hadn’t ordered anything new for a while. At times, it had felt like there’d been no time lost between her and Alex and, at others, a cavernous silence opened up that neither could navigate

‘Grab your coat, Nora,’ Alex called out and she looked up, startled.

‘Why? Where are we going?’

‘I’ve got an idea for the front of the shop. Dad’s already agreed and we’re off to sort it out.’

‘Oh, okay.’ She gently pushed the book back onto the shelf, ensuring it was level with all its friends, and moved to the back of the shop. Abe stood to the side and as she edged past Alex to reach down behind the counter, she felt a tingling in her spine that made her hands shake. She fumbled for her coat and put it on. ‘Ready to go.’

‘You sure you don’t mind us nipping out, Dad?’

‘Not at all, son.’ Abe busied himself dusting his telescopes and placing them back on top of the newly painted bookshelves. ‘Go and get some fresh air.’

He’d brightened so much over the last few days it was wonderful to see. Every morning Abe met her at the door, it was as if another wrinkle had disappeared from his brow.

Alex held the door open for Nora as a customer walked in. ‘What’s going on in here then, Abe?’

‘We’re having a bit of a facelift, Jilly.’

‘How marvellous. Oh, I’m so pleased.’ Jilly edged further inside and began browsing at the new releases table. She was the same age as Abe but her hair was still blonde and had cropped into a modern bob. Abe began to explain about the changes they were making.

‘When I came downstairs the other day to see the bookshelves painted, I couldn’t believe my eyes. It was so much brighter. Even my telescopes have had a clean-up.’

Alex and Nora left Abe chatting and she followed him down onto the seafront. The salty air hit her nose immediately. It almost stung sometimes, depending on how churned up the sea had become in the wind. Before them, with the tide out, the boats were stuck in the muddy, wet sand and fishermen clad in high waders took the opportunity to clean the sides of their boats and repair any faults. Their voices carried on the breeze as they called to each other and Nora enjoyed hearing their hoarse laughter.

‘Where are we going?’ she asked.

‘We’re headed up the winding path to the big flower farm at the top of the cliffs.’ Nora’s brows pinched together. ‘I was thinking about the front of the shop again and I thought we should stop letting Smuggler’s Lane down and get some nice pots and flowers out front.’

‘Good idea,’ she replied feeling her face soften as she relaxed. Though they’d spoken happily enough in the shop, talking out here felt different and the need to make small talk slowed her brain. Everything she thought of sounded false and stilted.

As they left the harbour and beach behind them, they started the climb up the winding path. True to its name, the path turned in a giant S shape up the side of the cliff, and the need for conversation faded as their breath was taken by the steep incline. Nora’s thighs were hot in her jeans, and her lungs burned with the effort, only easing when they reached the top. She wiped at her hairline to feel damp beneath her fingertips. When she was younger, she used to run up this path and would even ride her bike down it. The thought terrified her now. ‘I never realised how unfit I am.’

‘Me neither,’ Alex replied, his pace slow as he too caught his breath. ‘I’m sure I used to get up and down that easily.’

‘I have to admit I don’t fancy carrying lots of flowers back down the path.’

‘Don’t worry,’ he flapped a hand at her, swallowing his breathlessness. ‘We’ll arrange delivery. I’m not lugging planters back to the shop or I’ll die.’

From the top of the hill, they could see the town spread out beneath them. The harbour swept in a giant arc and the sea rolled in and out. It was calming to watch. No matter what happened, it’s continuous ebb and flow showed Nora the world would always turn. The farm stood in the opposite direction in the near distance. On the cliff top, the breeze was stronger, drying Nora’s face while the long grass tickled her ankles. They began a steady stroll side-by-side over the grassy bank towards the road. The desire to hold his hand like they would have done ten years ago nearly forced her to take his. She pushed her hands into her jacket pockets instead.

‘So…York,’ Nora said and internally groaned. Why had she come out with the most boring thing she could think of? She ploughed on regardless. ‘I’ve never been but I’ve heard it’s lovely.’

‘It really is,’ Alex replied, glancing at her. She knew her hair was plastered to her face from the breeze, sticking where she’d got so hot. She must look an absolute state. ‘I’d always thought I’d come back to Little Harbour, but I ended up staying there.’ Was this the moment he’d apologise? She held her breath. Alex hesitated, then carried on. ‘It’s such a beautiful city and full of little side streets and nooks and crannies. One of my favourite bars is called Ye Olde Starre Inn and is supposedly haunted.’

‘Really? I quite like the sound of that. Is that ghoulish?’

‘Not at all,’ he laughed. ‘I think that’s your bookish imagination. You always did like horror and adventure stories or those gothic tales. Is Rebecca still your favourite ever novel?’

She was surprised he remembered. ‘Yes, it is. Is Lord of the Rings still yours?’ He grinned and nodded. ‘I made Scott watch the old black and white movie of Rebecca with Laurence Olivier and Joan Fontaine one rainy Sunday. He said he might read the book after that, but he never did.’

‘Do you remember the day we watched it?’ Alex asked, his eyes sweeping over her again. ‘It was a rainy, dismal summer and you came to work in the shop, but Mum said they weren’t likely to get much trade with the weather being so bad, so she gave us the day off. I ran across to Lou’s bakery and got us fruit tarts and we camped out in my living room watching films. We only found it by accident and when I tried to turn it over you shouted no so loudly Mum came up.

Nora laughed. She remembered that day perfectly as if it had only been yesterday. The whole thing had been imprinted in her memory. To her, it had been the most wonderful impromptu date. They’d snuggled up under a blanket as heavy rain beat at the windowpanes, the sky outside a deep, threatening grey.

Maybe she’d been wrong all these years, convincing herself theirs had been just another summer romance to lessen the pain. Repeatedly she’d told herself it was a young love that would soon fade. You weren’t supposed to fall in love and marry the first man you fell for. The world told her you had to shop around and live a life before meeting someone and eventually settling down. Had she always been too busy doing what she thought she should do, and so desperate to get away she hadn’t realised how strong their bond was? Realising Alex was still waiting for a reply and looking at her curiously, she cleared her throat. ‘Umm, yeah, I remember it. It was nice.’

Cursing her conversational ineptitude, they walked into the flower farm. The large, wide wooden gate was hitched back and a painted sign at the top of a long drive said, ‘We’re open’ with three exclamation marks. Maybe they were struggling too. The long grass of the clifftop had given way to a dust track, and they followed it down to the small white building that was the shop, or at least, where you paid. Stretching out behind it was a Monet vision of colour. Reds, blues, mauves, greens and yellows all jostled for attention but somehow formed a harmonious view.

They began to wander through the different rows of plants, admiring the blooms and heady scents surrounding them. Some were small saplings, growing stronger with the spring, while others were bright and bold, ready to bloom.

‘I thought,’ Alex began, ‘we could get two long planters to go underneath each window. Little wooden trough type things. Then they won’t stick out too far into the road.’

‘I’m impressed,’ Nora replied, placing her hands on her hips. ‘You’ve thought this through.’

‘I’ve been taking notes from you,’ he teased. As he passed, watching her, she met his gaze defiantly and her body came alive.

‘What colour plants were you thinking then?’

‘Now that’s where you come in. I know nothing about plants, so you need to choose them.’

Nora considered what would work outside the bookshop, imagining it painted white again, glowing in the sun. She pictured it from the bottom of Smuggler’s Lane. With the blue and white colour scheme inside and a new sign above the door, she wanted something enticing. ‘What about some vibrant reds and yellows? Maybe some deep purples too? And the planter needs to be a dark wood to really set them off.’

Alex grinned broadly. ‘I can picture it now. Right, let’s find some then.’

They wandered around picking out pretty flowers that would look good together. After getting some advice as to what would look nice with the minimal of fuss, they ordered everything to be delivered in a couple of days’ time.

‘Back the way we came?’ Alex asked as they left the flower farm.

Nora glanced over to where he pointed. The winding pathway was definitely shorter, and she was eager to get back to the shop and carry on reorganising the books. There was so much left to do before she returned to London. But the other, far longer way that meandered slowly down to the town would give them both chance to talk about the people they were rather than the people they had been. Her enthusiasm for the shop won out, especially as Alex would be with her all afternoon. She’d just have to steer the conversation away from memories and onto newer, more exciting ground.

‘Let’s take the winding path. I can’t wait to get back to my crime section. By the way, you’re planting that lot,’ Nora teased. ‘I do books and indoor things, not gardening.’

‘I suppose I should as it was my idea. Though gardening’s not my thing either.’

‘What is your thing these days?’

He considered the question for a moment which was an unexpected reaction. She’d thought he’d immediately reel off a list of things like drinking, football, golf, naming friends he shared these with, or a girlfriend, but it took him a while to answer.

‘I don’t know really. Work, I suppose.’ He scratched the back of his head. ‘Not much else apart from that.’

Nora desperately hoped there was more than that because the thought that his life was so empty made her desperately sad. They walked on in companionable silence for a while but were soon chatting merrily like they’d always done before. She hated that there was so much time between them, but they were making up for it now. Yet, all the while she wondered if his life was so vacant, maybe coming home would be good for him as well as his dad.

Chapter 17

By the end of business on Friday, Nora left The Book Nook with paint spatters on her hands and a buzz in her body. The bookshop no longer resembled a sombre mausoleum, and they’d even begun re-stocking from the boxes of books in the junk room. After a little more convincing, Abe had agreed to a poster being placed in the window advertising when the first book club meeting would be. They’d decided to keep things relaxed and see who showed up to the pub before deciding on a book. If it was a no-go, they’d either try a different tactic, or leave that idea for a later date.

On a quick trip around town, she’d even found some cute wicker baskets to pile the sale items in. It was supposed to be a sunny and warm weekend so with any luck the town would be busy, and they’d be able to sell a lot of the old stock off to make way for new. The books that had faded in the sunlight or had dog-eared corners were knocked down to mere pence, but it was worth it to get rid of them. She’d actually put a couple aside for herself, much to the teasing tuts of Abe but she just couldn’t resist.

Abe seemed to have enjoyed the new lease of life the shop was getting but had spent most of his time upstairs re-acquainting himself with the rare book service. He was interested in all the new sites available and was looking forward to his first commission. It was wonderful to see him moving quicker, as if a love for life had been injected into his veins. He was even laughing and joking with Alex.

She and Alex had been left alone a lot of the time and it was wonderful to be near him. They’d chatted happily, though she had the feeling there was a lot more to him than she’d found out so far. There had to be. Tomorrow couldn’t come quick enough as she strode to her sister’s house. She and Alex were going to be helping in the shop as Abe was having a rare weekend off. He didn’t have any definite plans, he was just going to have a nice long walk, maybe read a bit, or watch some television. Just the thought of running the shop sent goose bumps over Nora’s skin. For a day at least she’d get to live her dream job, and while she knew she couldn’t live in that bubble forever, she was determined to make the most of it while she could.

As Nora opened the small white gate, raised voices carried through the slightly open upstairs window. The kids were laughing and giggling, and the sweet sound made Nora smile. They were such lovely children, and it was wonderful to reconnect with them.

After their last meeting had gone so well, Nora had messaged Kathryn throughout the week, checking in to see if she needed anything. The replies had started fairly friendly (not sisterly as such, but it was too soon for that) but as the days had passed, they’d become downright terse. Not knowing what she’d done to annoy her, Nora tried to see past it and focus on the fact they’d reconnected for a week, and both survived. Maybe Kathryn had had a tough time with the kids or Neil and the separation. She had a lot on her plate and being unwell on top of it was enough to make anyone irascible. Nora congratulated herself on her adulting. Even though Kathryn had said she didn’t need anything, Nora had stopped in at the small corner shop and grabbed a few bits including a bottle of wine and a few treats for the kids. It was the weekend after all, and as long as Nora didn’t tell Avril and Ozzie, Kathryn could dish them out when she wanted.

Adjusting the bags, Nora knocked on the door and waited. A figure she didn’t recognise from the outline in the glass came towards her. Mel opened the door and stared at Nora without speaking. She’d expected at least a hi or hello, that was just common manners after all, but Mel said nothing and glowered at Nora like she was an imposter.

‘Hi, Mel,’ Nora offered after a few awkward seconds. ‘I’ve come to see Kathryn.’

‘She’s not here,’ Mel said, shielding the slight gap between the door and the rest of the house so Nora couldn’t see in. Nora tilted her head. She could hear Kathryn through the upstairs window telling the children to calm down a little. Why would Mel lie like that?

‘Oh. Are you sure? I said I’d drop some bits in.’ She waved the carrier bag as if to prove she was telling the truth.

‘She doesn’t need anything.’

Worry began to bubble up inside Nora, rising up into her chest. This wasn’t like Kathryn at all. Mel’s mouth was set in a small grim line and her eyes narrowed. She was incredibly intimidating, but Nora wasn’t going to be kept from her sister.

‘Well, I texted earlier to say I was going to drop some bits in, and I’d like to come in and see her. I know she’s here.’

Mel lifted her chin, defiantly. ‘She’s busy.’

Nora firmed her voice. ‘Mel, let me in.’

‘She doesn’t want to see you.’

‘What? Why not?’ Thinking hard, Nora couldn’t identify anything she’d done over the past few days that would annoy her sister so much. The last time they’d sat together, Nora had felt like they were finally leaving the past behind. ‘This is ridiculous, Mel. She’s my sister and I want to see her. Please let me in.’

‘Oh, she’s your sister now, is she?’ Mel scoffed. ‘Funny, you didn’t care she was your sister before.’

The remark stung and Nora knew that was her penance for letting her pride stop her from forgiving, but she was here now, determined to get their relationship back on track. Ignoring Mel’s remark, she called out. ‘Kathryn? Kathryn?’

‘Stop it!’ Mel hushed her. ‘Everyone’s looking.’

Nora glanced around and did see a couple of net curtains flutter in the house behind, but she wasn’t going to let that stop her. ‘I don’t care. Kathryn? Kathryn?’ Nora heard the kids calling her name in the background and Kathryn swearing under her breath as she came down the stairs.

Mel turned her back on Nora to speak to Kathryn who was hiding out of sight. ‘You don’t have to speak to her if you don’t want to.’

Nora couldn’t make out what Kathryn said in her whispered reply, but then Mel begrudgingly shifted to the side and Kathryn appeared. She looked completely frazzled with her hair greasy and unwashed and her skin pale. She didn’t look well and clearly wasn’t getting any time to have a shower or look after herself. Despite this strange situation, Nora’s annoyance at Mel instantly faded to be replaced with worry. She wanted to help her sister. She also wanted to punch Neil in the face for leaving his wife and kids. As far as she knew, he hadn’t been around much, leaving Kathryn to do everything with the kids. She might have to go and pay him a visit, though Kathryn wouldn’t thank her for it.

‘What do you want, Nora?’

‘I’ve bought you some shopping. I chucked in a few treats for you and the kids too.’

A flicker of surprise past over her eyes. ‘You didn’t need to do that.’

Mel stuck her face forward. ‘I’ve already got Kathryn everything she needs.’

‘I was just trying to help,’ Nora said to them both. ‘Like you and Mum asked me to. What’s happened? What’s wrong?’

Mel scoffed. ‘As if you don’t know.’

‘No, I don’t know.’ Nora shook her head in shock. What the hell was going on?

Kathryn was a little calmer, but her voice was cold and hard. ‘I don’t need your help, Nora—’

What was she talking about? The old fire between them sparked up again and frustration took over. ‘What am I doing staying here if not to help you?’

‘Renovating a bookshop it seems,’ Mel replied. ‘You’ve spent nearly all your time there instead of here with your sister.’

‘Because she doesn’t want me here all the time,’ Nora fired back. ‘Kathryn, you’d get really annoyed with me if I was bugging you all the time, wouldn’t you?’ Kathryn didn’t answer. ‘Wouldn’t you? And we even sat and decided how this was going to work precisely so that wouldn’t happen.’

Kathryn lifted her head to meet her gaze. ‘I don’t need your help, Nora, and I don’t need you talking about me behind my back to your old boyfriend.’

‘What are you talking about? I haven’t talked about you behind your back.’ Mel snorted and Nora resisted the urge to slap her.

‘Mel saw you on Tuesday, talking to Alex about me in the bookshop.’

‘I wasn’t talking about you. I was just saying—’

‘You were just saying that I don’t talk to you much but then “you know how my family are.”’

No! Nora stiffened. She couldn’t deny that was what she’d said. Bloody Mel must have overheard that one little bit and told Kathryn. Out of context it sounded bad. So, so bad. Nora could easily see why Kathryn was upset but it wasn’t what it seemed. ‘Kathryn, all I meant was—’

‘You meant that I’m as bad as Mum and Dad.’ A fire raged behind her eyes, and she began to flush. The pinkness stood out against her pale, sickly complexion. ‘Well I’m not, Nora. I’m not as bad as them. Neil might have left me but I’m not treating my kids how we were treated; ignored when it suited them and made a fuss of when we were on show, playing happy families. I’m doing my best—’

‘I know. Kathryn, all I meant was—’

‘And what else have you said?’ asked Mel. ‘You and Alex have been working together for the last few days, what else have you been saying about her behind her back? Call yourself a sister. But then, you never have been much of a sister to her, have you?’

‘Mel,’ Kathryn said, gently pushing her backwards, signalling she needed to calm down. ‘It’s fine. Can you sort the kids out, please?’ Mel backed away but not before shooting a final death stare at Nora.

‘Kathryn, please, I just meant—’

‘I think you better go, Nora. I’ll tell the kids you’ve gone back to London.’

‘What? No!’ The thought of not seeing her niece and nephew anymore pierced her heart. ‘Please, Kathryn, just let me explain what I meant. It’s out of context.’

‘So you’re not denying you said those words then? Those exact words.’

‘I can’t,’ Nora replied, dropping her gaze. ‘But—’

‘Then there’s nothing more to say.’

The door began to close in her face and in shock, Nora stumbled away, still holding the shopping. For a second, Nora just stood there, staring at the white front door with the coloured glass panel. The temperature had suddenly dropped as she realised that she’d really put her foot in it this time. What did Mel mean that she hadn’t been much of a sister? Nora hadn’t been around but, if anything, it was the other way around. Kathryn had been the one to really break those sisterly ties. Nora began the walk back to the cottage only realising when she was near to home that she should have left the shopping on the doorstep instead the thin plastic handles were cutting painfully into her fingers.

***

By the time Becky knocked on the cottage door later than evening, Nora had calmed down somewhat, though a horrible mix of emotions swept through her from anger at Mel, anger at her own stupidity, guilt that she’d hurt her sister and resentful that Kathryn was behaving like this when she’d damaged Nora so badly in the past. Nora tried to control herself and put back the smile that had remained all week when she was with Alex.

Becky had been like a breath of fresh air to talk to. She was so bubbly and happy, if a little tired from the baby. They talked of the people they’d known at school, who was doing what, who’d left, who’d come home and the surprises they’d brought with them. After settling themselves on the sofa, they laughed endlessly.

‘So’ said Nora. ‘You and Rob? That was a surprise.’

‘To me too.’ Becky’s eyes sparkled as she spoke of him. ‘I think we’d both always fancied each other a little bit.’

‘Really? Even when we sat on the harbour saying who’d we’d never, ever date?’

‘Yeah, even then. I think I was just a bit embarrassed to admit it because he was so geeky. But then we just kept running into each other all the time and I realised that I quite liked his geekiness. I think I’m a closet geek too.’

‘You definitely are.’

‘Hey!’

‘Don’t worry, so am I,’ she added, grinning.

‘Neither of us ever did anything about it. Then we met by accident in a pub in town and he was single, and I was single and…we got talking and I found I didn’t want to stop talking to him. Sometimes you just have to forget about all the stupid things from when we were kids.’

‘I think you’re right there.’ Maybe that’s what she needed to do with Kathryn, after all, it had been a long time ago and it wasn’t as if her heart had never healed. ‘Are you coming to the book group we’re starting?’

‘I am. Rob’s looking after Toby and I get a night off. I can’t wait.’

‘Fabulous. We’re meeting at The Rose at 7.30pm.’

‘I saw the poster.’

Nora tried to banish thoughts of Alex from her brain, but he kept popping up whenever she thought about anything to do with books. ‘Bring a friend. I’m not sure how many people will turn up.’

‘I haven’t got many of those.’

‘What? Why not?’ Becky had always been super sweet and made friends easily. She couldn’t believe that she didn’t have people to talk too. Especially now she had a baby. Nora had been sure she’d have a whole gang of mum friends to go to cafés with.

‘Having a baby kind of cramped my style. I had a few friends from work but when I decided not to go back after maternity leave, we lost touch. They don’t have kids, and I don’t think they understood quite how knackering it is. They used to get annoyed when I didn’t want to come out, even though Rob offered to look after Toby.’

‘Well that sucks. I don’t have kids, but I’d never judge you for not coming out. I think those particular people are idiots.’

‘Yeah, me too. Now you know all about Rob, you have to tell me about your love life.’

‘Ha! What love life?’ Nora took a fortifying drink of wine.

‘Come on, there must have been dates even if there hasn’t been anyone who swept you off your feet?’

‘None that I’d care to recall. If Scott was here, he’d enjoy telling you all about my embarrassing dating disasters.’

‘Go on, I’m all ears.’

Knowing she wasn’t going to get out of it, Nora embraced her embarrassing stories as a bonding exercise. ‘Okay, hang on to your hat. The worst date I’ve ever been on was with this guy called Harrison who worked at the firm. He was in a totally different department so afterwards, I was able to hide from him, but if I ever saw him in the lift or something it was just the most mortifying thing ever.’

‘Intriguing. What exactly happened?’

‘He took me to this really posh restaurant. I got all glammed up – total hair and make-up, new clothes – everything. It was the type of place where a suited and booted waiter has a white tea towel over his arm and tucks your chair in for you.’

‘Right,’ Becky nodded along.

‘Well, that was the first problem. I didn’t know he was going to do that so when I sat down, I gripped the seat of the chair and yanked it forward. He pushed it forward at the same time and I ended up being launched across the table and got stabbed in the boob by an olive on a stick.’

Becky burst out laughing.

‘Honestly, I nearly got an impromptu nipple piercing. Then I decided good boys were too good for me, so I went into a bad boy phase. I met this guy in a Tesco Metro and he worked on a building site around the corner from me. I mean, he was drop dead gorgeous with really muscly arms. They were like Thor’s.’

‘Yum.’ Becky took another sip of her wine, enjoying the show.

‘Anyway, he asked me out, so I said yes. I had no idea where we going to go or what we were going to do so I dressed down all cute top, jeans and ballet pumps. I thought that way I’m ready for anything. You know, the cinema, a restaurant, bowling—’

‘And what happened?’

‘He only took me to his local boozer, didn’t he? Where all his mates were watching football. Plus, I hadn’t realised this before, but he was a proper cockney. I mean, PROPER cockney – all apples and pears and rhyming slang.’

‘So?’

‘So I couldn’t understand a word he said! He said something about Bristol City and I thought he was talking about the place and just assumed they were one of the football teams on the giant TV in the corner, but then all his mates guffawed and I checked it out on my phone and he was talking about my—’

‘Boobs.’

Nora stared. ‘How do you even know that?’

’I thought everyone knew that.’

‘Well, everyone except me apparently.’

‘What did you do?’

‘I told him to find some rhyming slang for the phrase “you’re a complete knob and you might have nice arms, but I bet you have a tiny penis”.’

Becky spluttered her drink and clamped her hand to her mouth. After a second of stifled laughter she was able to swallow. ‘Oh, God! I haven’t laughed this much in ages. Please tell me more.’

‘No! No more!’ But seeing Becky laughing and feeling the buzz of it in her own body, Nora continued. ‘I’m definitely not telling you about mine and Scott’s holiday to Ibiza and sandy sex on the beach. And no, that’s not a cocktail, it’s just a really unpleasant experience that required two tubes of thrush cream.’

Becky had tears running down her face and Nora did too. When they’d calmed down, Becky asked, ‘How do you like the cottage?’

Nora looked around, taking in all the cosiness. ‘It’s gorgeous. I really love it here. I wish I could stay for longer.’

‘Why don’t you? Surely it’s going to take longer than two weeks to turn the bookshop around? And from what you said about Kathryn, it sounds like she does still need you, even though she might not realise it. I know Mel’s been her friend for ages, but if she asked you first maybe you should try again.’

‘I’m really worried about her, Becky,’ Nora replied. ‘She just doesn’t look well and now Mel’s gone and stirred the pot, so I need to sort that out too. We were just starting to get along and now it’s all gone down the pan again.’

Luckily, Becky remembered Kathryn from school and though Nora hadn’t told her about the incident, Kathryn had a bit of a reputation for being fiercely independent and somewhat severe, so the fact they didn’t get on very well wasn’t a surprise. Kathryn didn’t seem to get on with anyone, according to Becky.

‘I wasn’t talking about her behind her back,’ Nora continued. ‘I was just telling Alex that we’re not a family that’s great on communication. Whatever Kathryn’s health scare is, I’m not convinced it’s healing the way it should either. Every time I see her, she looks worse not better. I know she hates me, but I can’t leave her like this.’

‘Has she been back to the doctors?’

‘She said she had an appointment this week but wouldn’t let me take her and when I messaged her on Thursday to see how it went, she just responded with “Fine”. That’s partly why I wanted to stop by tonight. I’m trying not to crowd her, but I really want us to get on better if we can. At the moment, that’s feeling like a lost cause.’ Nora gave a small smile, realising she was talking to Becky like she spoke to Scott. She hadn’t thought they’d fall back into their friendship so quickly.

‘I think you should follow your gut instinct. If you feel you should keep trying with Kathryn, then you should. You don’t want to walk away and let even more years pass where you don’t speak, all because of a silly misunderstanding.’

‘You’re right,’ Nora said with a smile. ‘But I don’t know how long I can impose myself on Abe either, and I don’t want to leave things half done. That feels worse somehow.’

‘And with Alex being down…’ Becky took a sip of her wine, eyeing Nora over the edge of the glass. Nora laughed. ‘Did you know he was coming home? We haven’t seen anything of him since his mum died.’

‘The last time I saw him was at the funeral too.’

‘Did you come down for it? You didn’t stay.’

Nora was relieved to see that Becky wasn’t annoyed. She nodded. ‘I knew Muriel pretty well and even though I’ve been avoiding this place for years I thought I should. Not that being here is bad – it’s not the place that’s the problem,’ she added quickly, eager not to upset Becky.

‘I know that,’ Becky replied with a laugh. ‘I think if I’d have had your family I’d have left as soon as I could too. I was always surprised Alex didn’t come back though. I was sorry to hear it had all kind of fizzled out with you two.’

‘That’s not quite what happened but—’

‘What did happen then?’

Nora stared into her wine glass. ‘We went to our separate uni’s and he ghosted me.’

‘What?’

‘I guess he got swept up in uni life and new girlfriends and that was it.’

‘I can’t believe it.’ Her brow crinkled. ‘Is that what he told you?’

‘We haven’t actually talked about it much yet. The only times we’ve got close he said he fell in love with York and decided to stay but he’s never actually apologised.’

‘Did you try and contact him?’

‘For a while yeah but then it became clear he wasn’t interested anymore, and I moved on.’ Or at least convinced herself she had.

‘Wow. Then he met that girl obviously. The one he brought to the funeral. Did you see her?’

Nora had seen the girl at the funeral and had to admit that amongst the sadness she’d felt a pang of something in her heart. The girl was petite with thick dark hair cut into a stylish bob. She’d held his hand as he’d cried and it hadn’t seemed appropriate to speak to him or Abe, who was beside himself with grief. ‘He hasn’t mentioned anyone when we’ve been chatting, so I think they’ve split up or something.’

‘Not that you’re interested,’ Becky teased, and Nora reddened.

In truth, she’d become more and more interested the longer she and Alex had talked. The connection they had so long ago was still there and it was only growing stronger the more time they spent together. She had a strong physical reaction to him as well. When he was near her, her body tingled and if he accidentally brushed against her, her skin would flame. But it had only been a few days since they’d reconnected, and she didn’t really know anything about him. She still had one more week to find out though and to hear the elusive apology she craved.

Under Becky’s gaze, Nora said, ‘Hey, I came down here to see my family. I had no idea Alex would show up.’

‘Well, that was an added bonus then.’

A small voice in her head told her it certainly was. She’d fancied him as soon as she’d begun working in the bookshop. They were a bit like Anne and Captain Wentworth from Persuasion and if she wasn’t careful with her bruised and battered heart, she was in serious danger of falling for Alex Nicholson for a second time.

Chapter 18

Alex had waited for Saturday morning with mounting excitement and anticipation, looking forward to getting to know Nora even more.

He’d nipped out early to get some coffees and pastries from the bakery down the other end of Smuggler’s Lane for a special breakfast. His dad’s old jar of instant coffee was fine, but for some reason he wanted to make today noteworthy. Knowing that she would be leaving soon, or he would, made him want to grab hold of this opportunity.

Fear tugged at his stomach, reminding him that impetuousness had been the wrong path as far as Cassie was concerned. The instinct in him was to pull back, to keep a distance, but every time he saw Nora, or thought of her, the need to know more about her was too strong to ignore.

When Nora appeared at the door, he’d expected her to be as excited as he was at the prospect of opening again with the new, brighter shop. They weren’t expecting a landslide of customers as they hadn’t advertised anything yet, but they were hopeful they might get one or two more. Though Nora smiled, there was a sadness to her eyes. They didn’t sparkle the same way they had the night before when they’d said goodbye at the shop door.

As she came in, he held up the takeaway coffee cups. ‘I got us coffees and croissants.’

‘Did you? Thanks.’ She was definitely subdued. Something was up.

‘I wanted to get Dad a nice packed lunch for his walk. He said he was leaving at nine and wasn’t sure when he’d be back.’

‘That’s nice of you.’ Alex had to stop himself from blushing. He felt ridiculously proud that she approved of his actions. ‘Has he gone already?’

The sound of a tank coming down the stairs showed that Abe was just on his way. He appeared from behind the red velvet curtain, fighting with his rucksack and unfortunately, losing.

‘This blinking zip is stuck.’ Abe manhandled his backpack into submission before wrestling it on his back. He’d even dug out his old Nordic walking poles and hiking boots. ‘Oh, hello, flower. Looking forward to today? It’ll be like old times.’

Was it his imagination or had Nora shot a look at him? He hoped so, but unsure, Alex turned his attention to his dad. ‘I’ve made you lunch, Dad. Well, I’ve bought you some. I wanted you to have something nice to celebrate your first weekend off in I don’t know how long.’ Alex pulled out a Tupperware box from under the counter. ‘I got you a sausage roll, a Scotch egg, a ham sandwich, a jam tart and an apple turnover. As well as some crisps and snacks.’

‘Goodness, that’s more food than I’d normally eat in a day.’ Abe’s eyes brightened at the feast before him.

‘Well, you’ll probably work up a bit of an appetite on your walk and you could do with feeding up.’

Abe beamed at his son. ‘I’m going to walk all the way along the top of the cliffs to the war memorial and then back. And what a perfect day. Bright blue skies, no rain forecast and a slight breeze.’

This new version of dad was so heart-warming for Alex. To see such a change over such a short period of time had seemed impossible before, but now Alex contemplated what might happen if he stayed longer than just a couple of weeks. His dad had so much more energy, a light in his eyes and, as cliché as it was, a spring in his step. Quite literally, a spring as he bounced along when he walked, rather than slouched with the weight of unhappiness. Alex had anticipated going back to York when Nora left. The bookshop would be revamped by then, but he’d enjoyed reconnecting, and it seemed like he was finally starting to move on from the grief they’d been trapped in for almost two years. Alex tucked the lunchbox into his dad’s backpack and was grateful to see a large water bottle already inside. ‘There you go then. You’re all set.’

With a pat on the back from Alex and a warm smile at Nora, Abe left.

‘Shall we get started?’ asked Nora, manoeuvring around the counter and picking up her coffee cup. ‘I want to tackle the junk room today.’

An hour later, and still with no customers, Alex nervously adjusted the collar of his T-shirt. Nora was bent over un-packing one of the boxes and from his position near the doorway, he couldn’t help but watch her body move. When they were younger, she’d had a boyish, athletic frame, and he’d loved her then, but the woman in front of him now had curves in all the right places. It was making the back of his neck hot. Not to mention trying to hold back the images that were appearing in his brain was mentally exhausting.

‘Look at this one!’ she called, standing up and showing him a cellophane wrapped packet of wrapping paper, complete with matching gift tags. ‘It’s gorgeous. Your mum had excellent taste.’ She picked up the pile she’d been accumulating and darted past him to the front of the shop.

‘She did.’ Alex replied, pushing his hands into his pockets as he followed along behind. ‘She loved stationery and really wanted to expand the business. People who love books, love stationery. I’ve got about twenty un-used notebooks. I’m kind of addicted to buying them.’

‘Me too. I always assumed it was a girly thing.’

‘Nope. It’s definitely not.’ His phone rang and the tinny noise, suppressed by the back pocket of his jeans grew louder as he pulled it out. He knew it wasn’t work as he’d finally been able to submit the toothpaste copy, perhaps it was one of his friends checking in on him. Alex felt the muscles of his face freeze as he saw it was Cassie. He glanced up at Nora who, with no reason to suspect something was wrong, was quite happily organising the gift wrapping on the hooks they’d put up between the bookshelves.

She stood back and cast her eye over the display before shooting a glance at him. ‘Are you going to get that? Or is it one of those nuisance calls?’

‘I, umm – I’m not sure.’ It wasn’t that Cassie was a nuisance, he just didn’t really know what they had to say to each other. ‘I’ll just take this out the back, if that’s okay?’

‘Sure.’ Nora shrugged and began moving packets of gift wrap around.

Alex swiped to accept the call as he walked into the small garden area used mostly for storing the rubbish. ‘Hi, Cassie.’

‘Hey,’ her voice was small and nervous. Had something happened? His throat tightened. ‘Is it okay – are you okay to talk?’

‘Yeah, sure.’ He glanced over his shoulder but there was no sign of Nora. His dad had been right. It was a beautiful day. A clear sky peppered here and there with fluffy white clouds showed no sign of rain. The breeze carried a salty tang from the sea. He’d missed the taste of it. ‘What’s up?’

Cassie didn’t respond at first, then a stifled sob emerged. ‘I miss you. Sorry! Sorry, I didn’t want to cry. I just wanted to ring and tell you how I feel but now I’ve started I can’t stop.’

She didn’t say anything more, unable to get the words out and Alex’s heart hurt for her, but the truth was he didn’t love Cassie, and he was pretty sure that she didn’t love him. Not really. Their love had been intense even before his mum had died. After she’d passed, it had increased to a frightening degree, but they always ended up fighting over silly things because they weren’t actually compatible. He’d told himself opposites attract and that you didn’t have to agree with your partner all the time, but he’d realised you did need to have some shared interests. Some common ground. He loved reading, she hated it. She loved exercise, he loathed it. They didn’t like the same type of music, or the same type of movies and when they weren’t in bed together, making up for the last row they’d had, they actually had very little to talk about.

‘I really miss you.’

‘Cassie…’

Alex froze unsure what to say. His brain had ceased producing thoughts and all he could do was stare at a passing cloud. The back of his throat dried as he listened to her. She took a deep breath and composed herself. Her voice was slightly stronger but still wavered, showing him she was holding back more tears.

‘I – I’m not sure breaking up was the right thing to do.’

‘Cassie, it was—’ he began but she kept talking.

‘The last three months have been horrible. I know we said it was because we kept fighting. I know we agreed it was all a mistake, but now we’ve been apart, I don’t think it was. I think we just moved too quickly. I’ve missed you so much. Haven’t you missed me?’

Christ. How did he answer that question? Cassie was right, the last three months had been horrible. Splitting up with someone was very rarely anything other than awful. You hurt, you mourned the relationship you’d had and the possibility of what might have been. There were adjustments to make; finding somewhere to live, living alone, eating alone. But that didn’t mean it wasn’t the right thing to do. The truth was, he’d missed Cassie at first, but as time had gone on, he’d accepted they should never have got together in the first place. He knew he couldn’t say that. Even to his ears it sounded cold and callous and would be like pinching a bruise; making all this harder and more hurtful. He wouldn’t do that to Cassie. The time they’d had together was special and though it turned out to be wrong, he wouldn’t trade those memories, but for him the relationship had run its course and that had been reinforced since he came back to Little Harbour. When he’d met Nora Bell again. The realisation jolted him as the words formed unbidden in his brain. ‘Listen, Cassie, I I know it’s hard—’

‘I think we should try again, Alex. I think if we took things slowly, started dating again, pretending like everything else never happened, we’d be better this time. Happier. We just rushed into everything and neither of us were ready.’

Since he’d answered the call, he’d been dreading hearing those words. ‘Cassie, please, slow down.’

‘I thought you loved me.’

‘I did love you, Cassie, I still do, in a way, but—’

‘But I wasn’t enough, was I? Not for the long run.’

A sharp pain stabbed in his temples. He couldn’t bear to hear her hurting like this, but he couldn’t give her what she wanted. He made an attempt to put his jumbled thoughts and feelings into words. ‘Cassie that’s not it. It’s not that you weren’t enough. I just wasn’t ready. I rushed us into everything and ruined it all—’

‘So let’s try again.’

Alex could feel himself getting backed into a corner with no way out except for ploughing through, being blunt and hurting Cassie even more, but he couldn’t bring himself to do it. Was it cowardice not to tell her straight now? Like ripping off a plaster, it would hurt like hell but possibly help her get over it all more quickly. It seemed unnecessarily cruel. Maybe giving her more time would help her to come to terms with it. ‘Cassie, I’m down with my dad for a while. He needs me right now. The bookshop needs me. I don’t know how long I’ll be here for and I think you’ll soon realise—’

‘No. It’s you who needs to realise we have to give this another try.’

‘Cassie—’

‘I have to go. We’ll talk again later—’

‘Cassie—’ He raised his voice as much as he dared so she’d hear him, but she’d hung up before he could say anything else and Alex was left, his legs unsteady beneath him and his heart thundering. He’d honestly thought telling her he was down here would hint that he didn’t want to get back together. That he was moving on. Should he call her back? he wondered staring at his phone. It wasn’t something he could say via text. He’d have to think about it. He’d done too many things impetuously, hurting people in the process. It was time to take a step back and think before he acted this time. He needed to figure out how to make it clear without hurting her further.

With a sinking feeling, he walked back into the shop. Nora was still busy grabbing things from the junk room and excitedly running back in to hang them up. As he passed, he looked in, surprised to see how much space she’d cleared already. It was still pretty full of empty boxes, but he’d move those before lunch. It would all need a paint and a deep clean, but he could picture the Kids’ Corner and some armchairs for the reading room. Nora Bell had been like a breath of fresh air, it was extraordinary.

The realisation of how much he felt for Nora tightened his chest like a weight was pressing down on it, forcing the air from his lungs.

‘There you are,’ Nora said, spying him near the counter. He slipped his phone into his back pocket. ‘You okay? Your girlfriend giving you a hard time?’

‘What?’ Looking up, he realised she’d been joking but still reeling from his conversation with Cassie he’d barked at her.

‘Oh, nothing. Sorry.’ Her eyes darkened and she turned away.

Alex’s body filled with self-loathing, and he felt like the worst man on the planet. Nora had no idea about Cassie or how far their relationship had gone and how it had ended. He should have controlled himself instead of getting defensive all because he’d managed to make matters with Cassie even worse.

‘Yeah, just a … thing.’

‘Right.’ For the first time, the air grew heavy with awkwardness. ‘What do you think?’ Nora asked brightly. ‘Your mum had actually brought some notebooks! Look.’

While he’d been talking, she’d removed all the kids’ books from their bookcase, ready to go into the reading room and used the space to show off the greeting’s cards, ribbons and leftover packs of wrapping paper. There was even a beautiful display of brightly patterned notebooks. The shop looked so different with all this new stock and the blue and white theme; he couldn’t believe it was the same place. He watched Nora for a second and to his horror, she seemed on edge around him now. Nervous. ‘Wow, Nora, it looks amazing. Do you want me to clear those empty boxes for you?’

‘Yes, please. And we even had some customers in while you were on the phone. They said how lovely it was to see the place coming back to life. And they brought some books.’

‘Would they have been allowed to leave if they hadn’t?’

‘Umm,’ she pressed a finger to her lips, in exaggerated thinking. ‘No. From next week, we’ll start on re-painting the junk room. If your dad watches the shop, you and I can get that done in a few days. I’m so excited to see it.’

‘Good. I was worried about you this morning. You seemed really down.’

‘Worried about me?’ she asked, and he nodded before looking away. The way she was staring at him made the hairs on the back of his neck stand on end and, after his conversation with Cassie, he felt even more guilty. ‘I was a bit down but doing all this has cheered me right up.’

‘Are we working you too hard?’

‘No, not at all. I love doing this.’ She gestured around and he could see she truly did.

Just then an older lady who seemed a little unsteady on her feet came in and Nora leapt to greet them. Alex watched on in awe as she chatted away, making them laugh as she explained what they were up to.

‘Brilliant,’ the customer replied. ‘I’ve always loved this bookshop, it’s so good to see it full of life again.’

Nora sold them a few books, some of the gift-wrapping and a notebook. She had a real talent for it. There was no hard sell, no pressure, just friendly chatting. It made him think of how the shop was when his mum was there. Muriel would do exactly the same thing, and he knew she’d approve.

When the customer had left, Alex desperately wanted to make up for his shortness. ‘So what was wrong? Why were you feeling down?’

Her chest heaved with a big breath. ‘Kathryn and I had a whopper of a row last night. Like a proper biggy.’

‘Over what? I thought things were finally settling down between you two?’

‘Urgh, it’s all Mel’s fault.’ She brushed a stray hair back from her face. ‘Actually, that’s not true. It’s mine.’

‘Do we need coffee for this?’

‘It might help,’ she said with a slight raise of an eyebrow.

‘Wait there.’

Alex dashed out to get coffee and cake from the bakery. He already knew what he was going to order when he stepped inside, but there were so many wonderful smells and sights he changed his mind several times before coming back to his original plan. But he held firm, knowing the nostalgia would bring a smile to Nora’s face.

‘In again, Alex?’ asked Lou, mischievously. ‘We don’t see you for years either, then you can’t keep away from us. Have you come to see me or buy one of my gorgeous cakes?’

He pointed to what he wanted. ‘Two of those, please?’

She cooed. ‘They used to be yours and Nora’s favourites. And your mum’s. Always buying those on a Saturday, you were. It’s nice having you both back. What brought you home so soon after Nora returning?’

‘Just coincidence,’ he replied, trying to keep his tone light. Lou was lovely but she did have a habit of either probing too deeply or hitting the nail on the head. Both of which were uncomfortable experiences if you weren’t ready for them. She handed over a white box and Alex couldn’t wait to get back to the shop and cheer Nora up.

When he returned, Nora was sat in his dad’s armchair, staring at her feet where four books were laid out on the floor. She kept picking them up and looking at them, turning them over and placing them down again. The slight wrinkles on her forehead told him she was concentrating hard. ‘What are you up to?’ he said with a laugh in his voice.

‘I’m just trying to choose some books for the book club. I thought we could all decide together at the first meeting, but I thought it’d be better if I went with some suggestions. We don’t want a row on our first night.’

‘That’s true.’

Nora came over to lean on the counter. ‘What’s in the box?’

‘Well,’ he rubbed the back of his neck feeling suddenly embarrassed but determined to make her feel better. ‘I thought a little treat might help cheer you up and I wanted to apologise for being so snippy earlier. Sorry about that.’ He opened the box and Nora’s eyes widened immediately.

‘You got fruit tarts! They look great.’ She looked up at him and their eyes met. Again, a bolt of electricity penetrated his body shooting from the top of his head to the soles of his feet. He couldn’t take his eyes away, afraid that if he did, he might never feel like this again. Nora was the first to speak as if nothing had just happened. Had she not felt the same thing? ‘And you don’t need to apologise. I’m sorry I stuck my nose in.’

‘You didn’t,’ he responded quickly. ‘It was just a bit of a difficult call I wasn’t expecting. Tell me what’s happening with you and Kathryn.

‘Mel overheard us talking and told Kathryn what I said about her and my family. When she repeated it back to me it sounded so horrid. I can’t really blame anyone but myself. Now Kathryn’s got the hump with me and I just wish she’d let me explain that I didn’t mean it the way it sounded.’ She picked off one of the strawberries from the fruit tart and popped it into her mouth. She’d always eaten them like that; picking off all the fruit then eating the custard and pastry.

Alex tore his eyes away. If he kept watching her putting the fruit in her mouth, then licking her fingers he’d die from the desire mounting inside him. ‘What are you going to do?’

‘I’m going round there tomorrow to apologise and say I’m not going anywhere until she’s better, whether she likes it or not.’

‘That sounds very grown up and umm…’ He scratched his temple. ‘Dangerous.’

Nora threw her head back and laughed. ‘I don’t know how Kathryn will take the news either, but I’ve got to try. We’re grownups now. It’s time to put all our family difficulties behind us and start afresh. I’ve already sorted it with work and extended my leave by a week.’

‘Really?’

‘Yep. Kathryn needs me, whether she wants to admit it or not and I’m going to be there for her.’

‘Okay. Good luck. I’d suggest wearing a helmet and possibly some kind of body armour.’

Nora eyed the rubbish behind the counter. ‘Could you make me some out of the empty cardboard boxes?’

‘Do we have scissors and tape?’ She reached over and held some up. ‘Then yes I can.’

As Nora finished her fruit tart, it didn’t take him long to decide he was going to do the same. If he went back too soon, Cassie would think it was to be with her which was the opposite message to the one he intended. Maybe if he stayed down here long enough, she’d realise he’d moved on. He’d also have to figure out something to say and call her again in a few days. His mind was feeling freer than it had in years. Maybe it was the fresh air or maybe it was just being home. He looked around at all they’d accomplished so far and wanted to see it through, to see his dad settled into this new life. Maybe he’d even stay until they found someone to work in the shop so his dad could have a proper holiday. He certainly didn’t need to rush back to York. One more week in Little Harbour wouldn’t hurt.

Chapter 19

‘Kathryn, you look terrible.’

‘Thanks a lot,’ she said sarcastically.

Nora hadn’t expected her sister to look like death when she visited on Sunday morning, determined to put things right between them. Kathryn, who always prided herself on her appearance and had worn make-up since she was old enough to buy it, stood before her with dark shadows under her eyes. In old tracksuit bottoms and an oversized jumper, she seemed to have shrunk since the last time Nora had seen her only two days before. The clothes swamped her, hanging loosely off her frame and covering her hands.

On the way, Nora had prepared a whole speech about how she wasn’t leaving until she knew Kathryn was better and that she was going to do whatever it took to get things back on track, but all those words had vanished. Kathryn opened the door without any argument and trudged to the kitchen.

‘Have you been to the doctors?’

The light from the window spilled in and Kathryn squinted. ‘I went last week, remember.’ She hunched over and, cradling her stomach, shuffled to the kettle. Her lank hair hung about her ashen, white face. The only thing with any colour were her cheeks that were a startling, flushed pink. Without thinking, Nora went to feel her forehead, but Kathryn jerked back. ‘I’m fine.’

‘You’re really not. I think you should go back to the doctor. You don’t look well at all.’

Kathryn groaned and bent over the counter. ‘I don’t feel one hundred percent, actually. I’m queasy, cold and sweaty. I’ll go tomorrow once I’ve got the kids to school.’

‘I don’t think you can wait until tomorrow.’ Kathryn had begun slowly pacing around the kitchen as if to take her mind off her discomfort and Nora watched, resisting the urge to reach out and get her to sit down. Kathryn moaned again. ‘Right, that’s it. I’m taking you down to the walk-in centre. You’re not right. You need to see a doctor…now. Where are the kids?’

‘They’re with their father. He’s dropping them back this afternoon.’

Nora quite fancied ringing him and calling him names for not caring about the state Kathryn was in. ‘Well, I’ll ring him and tell him what’s —’

‘Don’t tell him where we’re off too.’

Why was her sister so proud and stubborn? It really did make life difficult. In some ways she hadn’t changed at all. ‘Kathryn, I understand you’ve split, and you want to keep your life to yourself but—’

‘Just tell him I’m under the weather. Don’t make a big deal of it, please?’

Kathryn’s ‘pleases’ were normally more of a demand tacked onto the end of a sentence for reasons of etiquette rather than having any actual meaning. They weren’t normally a genuine question and the pleading tone caught Nora off guard. Immediately her worry levels shot up to critical.

‘Okay,’ Nora said. ‘I’ll just say to keep hold of them until I swing by and get them or we’re home from our little trip out. They can stay with me tonight so you can rest.’ Kathryn moaned again. Whatever was going on was causing her a lot of discomfort, if not out and out pain. She wanted to ask more about the operation and what exactly had been wrong, but the last thing she wanted to do was annoy her.

‘Okay. I do feel like crap.’

That was all the agreement Nora needed, and with such easy assent from Kathryn, her stress levels increased to panic. Forcing her practical side to kick-in, Nora grabbed Kathryn’s trainers from the front door and her coat from the hook and took them to her.

‘I’m not sure I can get them on,’ Kathryn said meekly, lowering herself into one of the chairs at the small kitchen table.

‘Let me.’ Nora bent down in front of her and helped her sister slip on her shoes, all the time the cortisol ricocheted around as worry grew fierce. She was just thankful the kids weren’t there to see this. After helping Kathryn to stand on legs that were clearly too wobbly to support her, Nora wrapped her coat around her sister’s shoulders. ‘I’ll need to drive your car.’

Kathryn nodded. ‘Keys are in my handbag.’

Nora fished them out and locked the door behind them. She helped Kathryn into the passenger side of the car and then climbed in. ‘Right, let’s get you to the hospital.’

Hunched forwards, Kathryn didn’t speak as Nora navigated the short distance to the local walk-in centre, but seeing how pale and clammy she was, Nora opened a window to allow some fresh air in. As she drove the streets, thankful she knew the way, Nora realised she could never be a paramedic. This was all far too stressful. She had no idea how they did this sort of thing on a day-to-day basis. Sliding into the first space she saw, Nora jumped out and rounded to Kathryn’s side. ‘Come on, let’s get you in and seen to.’

Slowly, they made their way through the automatic doors. With Nora’s support, they went to the counter to get checked in. The cheerful receptionist began speaking to Kathryn but when she asked about what was wrong, Kathryn turned to Nora. ‘Could you get me some water from the machine over there, please?’

Nora bit her lip. She’d been ready to protest and stay there to help, not to mention find out what was going on, but doing anything other than what Kathryn asked was inevitably going to start a row. Nora nodded and went. She tried to listen, not because she was nosy but if she knew what was wrong, she could help even more. If she had more information, she might have been able to stop things getting to this state. By the time she’d filled the little plastic cup from the water dispenser, Kathryn was shuffling towards the waiting room.

Just as they sat down a nurse called her. They must have been concerned to see her so quickly. A couple of sneers were shot their way from those who’d been waiting, but they seemed far more comfortable than Kathryn, so Nora ignored them.

‘Do you want me to come in with you?’ Nora asked, taking the cup back from Kathryn’s shaking fingers.

‘No, thanks.’

When Kathryn had gone, led away by a kindly looking nurse, Nora fiddled about with her phone, texting Scott and finding out what he was up to just to take her mind off things. She didn’t let him know what was going on with her, she wanted to have a proper talk to him over the phone, whilst sat on the sofa in her sweet little cottage, glass of wine in hand. Ensuring the conversation stayed on him and Ravi, she was pleased to hear that Ravi had a rare Sunday off. Nora contemplated texting her mum and getting more information from her as to what was wrong with Kathryn. But, as usual, their mum hadn’t bothered contacting them now she was off doing what she wanted, so the chance of any sort of reply was virtually non-existent. Knowing Kathryn would hate her even more for going behind her back, Nora would just have to wait until Kathryn felt able to tell her. Luckily, Nora always carried a book in her handbag and pulled out her latest read to pass the time.

The clock clicked by incredibly slowly, but eventually Kathryn reappeared. She was still pale, but her eyes were a little less pinched with concern. That it didn’t look like she was being admitted was a welcome surprise. Nora stood up to greet her. ‘Everything okay?’ Clearly they weren’t, but she didn’t know how else to phrase the question.

‘I’ve got a bit of an infection, so I’ve got some super powerful antibiotics to take for the next ten days.’

‘Ten days?’ Though relieved, Nora was surprised it was for that long. She wasn’t a doctor, but the infection must be quite bad for Kathryn have to take them for such a long time.

‘I know you’ll be going back before I’ve finished them, but the nurse said I should start to feel better in a day or two, so it won’t be a problem, you can still go. You don’t have to hang around for me.’

‘Tough luck,’ Nora said with a smile. ‘I’ve already extended my leave for another week, so I’ll be here to make sure you take all the antibiotics and not skip any.’

Kathryn’s eyes widened as she turned to her sister. ‘Don’t worry, I feel so bad I’ll definitely take them. The nurse said I had to complete the course and rest as much as possible. I told her there’s no doubt I will. I don’t want to feel like this ever again. The rest bit might be a stretch though.’

‘Come on, let’s get you home and into bed. I’ll ring Neil and wait for him to bring the kids back. If you don’t mind, I’ll look after them at yours, do dinner and get them into bed. Then I’m staying with you.’

Kathryn shook her head and immediately grimaced. ‘I haven’t got a spare room. The kids are having to share as it is.’

‘That’s okay, I’ll sleep on the sofa. One night won’t kill me and I’d rather be with you in case you need anything. You can’t possibly sort the kids out the state you’re in.’

Either from being ill or tiredness, Kathryn’s eyes misted with tears and Nora didn’t really know what to do. Kathryn wasn’t the sort of person who burst into sobs. Even after The Incident, she’d tried to blag her way out of it and make out Nora was partially to blame. ‘Thanks, Nor.’

That was the second time in a very long while someone had called her Nor. That had to be considered progress. Was her life unsticking from the dull, stagnant spot it had been in? Nora squeezed Kathryn’s shoulders a little tighter. ‘That’s what I’m here for.’

***

The sofa wasn’t the most comfortable place to sleep, but as Nora had once fallen asleep on a park bench after a teenage night out, it certainly wasn’t the worst night. Avril and Ozzie came bouncing down the stairs and jumped on her.

‘Aunty Nora!’

Waking up that way was a bit of a shock for a woman who’d always woken naturally, most often than not, sleeping through her alarm. They began to climb on top of her, Ozzie searching for the television remote as he went. Nora wrapped her arms around them. Considering she wasn’t normally a morning person, hearing their singsong voices made her grateful rather than grumpy. She couldn’t imagine feeling like that every day if they woke her like that, but it certainly made a pleasant change once in a while. ‘Morning, monkeys.’

‘Can we have some chocolate lumps for breakfast?’

‘Chocolate lumps? That doesn’t sound like a healthy breakfast.’

‘It’s our cereal,’ Avril replied, giggling.

‘You can’t just have lumps of chocolate for breakfast,’ Nora teased. ‘Why don’t I make you some lovely porridge with lots of fresh fruit?’

‘No!’ The kids shouted in unison while Nora laughed. Avril darted past her into the kitchen and found the cereal in the bottom cupboard, holding it up proudly for Nora to see.

‘Ah, right. I don’t see why not. Come on, show me where the bowls are, and I’ll take something up to your mum too. What time is it?’ She was talking more to herself than to the three- and four-year olds scrabbling around her feet who clearly couldn’t tell the time. A quick check of her phone showed her it was half six. The last time Nora had been up this early, she’d still been awake from the night before. Maybe she’d let Kathryn sleep in a bit longer, though she might sneak in and just check she had enough water.

Kathryn had four antibiotic tablets to take during the day and after getting her home had been able to have three before the day was out, as well as pain relief every four hours. She’d gone straight to bed and Nora had checked on her frequently. Eventually, Kathryn had fallen asleep in the late afternoon, waking up a couple of times in the night. Every time she had, Nora heard the floorboards creak as she went to the toilet and had made sure to climb halfway up the stairs and check she didn’t need anything. That Kathryn’s answers had been polite and even, at times, thankful, had kept Nora on her guard through the small hours. She knew that when Kathryn started getting annoyed with her fussing, she was on the mend.

After giving the kids their breakfast and getting them ready for school and nursery, which they were surprisingly helpful with, Nora nipped up to see Kathryn. She tapped on the door and opened it a little to see her attempting to get dressed and failing miserably. It was still too much of an effort and the act of picking out clothes was already tiring her out. In the bedroom they’d shared as kids, Kathryn’s side of the room had always been tidier than hers. She was just one of those people able to pick up after themselves and put everything back in its proper place. Though Nora had tried to be like that, even her tiny box room in the flat ended up a mess.

Kathryn looked up. ‘I need to get the kids ready. I shouldn’t have slept so late, but I forgot to set the alarm.’

Nora dashed into the room and gestured for her to get back into bed. ‘Don’t worry, I’ve done it.’

‘You’ve done it?’ Kathryn relented and flopped backwards.

‘Yes,’ Nora replied with laughed. ‘I am capable of adulting you know. I don’t know much about having kids, but I had a hamster, didn’t I? It can’t be that different. You just have to give them food and water and pet them occasionally.’

‘Snowy died when Mum and Dad got back together and took us on a weekend break to Butlin’s at Bognor Regis. You poured far too much food into his bowl, and he ate it all then had some kind of a heart attack.’

Nora paused from fluffing her pillows. ‘I’d actually repressed that traumatic memory, thank you very much. But don’t worry, I haven’t done the same with the kids. They’ve had their breakfasts, I’ve made packed lunches, and they’ve told me what time they leave for school. Though I’m not sure either eleven thirty or ten to seven are right.’

Kathryn grinned and relief washed over her features. ‘We leave at half eight. The school’s only a ten-minute walk and they have to be there at eight forty-five. They go to our old primary school and nursery.’

‘I saw the logo on their shirts.’ They shared a momentary reminiscence of happier times. ‘I’ll make sure they’re on time. Do you want anything to eat? You look a lot better. How are you feeling?’

‘A lot better already,’ Kathryn said, taking the water and having a drink. ‘I need a shower. I was sweating buckets last night and I stink.’

‘You had a temperature, but I think having those antibiotics has really helped. You’re not so hot or flushed. You’re still quite pale though.’

‘I still feel really tired.’

‘Then stay in bed today.’

Without thinking Kathryn shook her head, then relenting, fell back against the pillows and pulled her legs up towards her. ‘Maybe. What about the kids?’

‘I’ll get them from school and look after them ‘til bedtime. I’ve got the book club launching tonight but that’s not until seven thirty and it’s only for a few hours. You can always ring me if you need me. I can even stay here again if you want?’

‘I’m sure I’ll be fine. Kathryn pulled the duvet around her. ‘Did you really extend your leave to stay with me?’

‘I did,’ Nora said proudly.

‘Even though I’ve been a bit off with you?’

‘Even though you were completely mean to me,’ she teased. ‘I totally get why you got annoyed Kathryn, but I promise it wasn’t as bad as it sounds. I just meant our family in general aren’t the best communicators. Mel didn’t overhear what she thought she did.’

Kathryn opened her eyes and stared at her for a moment as if trying to decipher the truth in her face. ‘She’s just trying to protect me.’

Nora knew Scott would do the same for her. ‘Does she think I’m that bad?’ Nora joked, but the look on Kathryn’s face instantly concerned her. ‘What?’

‘It’s always been so hard with Mum and Dad, hasn’t it? And I tried to protect you from as much of their crap as I could, but people gossiped about us all the time and it was all so humiliating.’ Kathryn’s forehead creased in sadness.

Nora reached forward and rubbed her sister’s shoulder. ‘I’m starting to realise how much you had to deal with because of Mum and Dad. I didn’t have a clue how hard it must have been for you. I’m sorry I never thought of your feelings more.’

‘You shouldn’t have had to. You should have just been able to be a kid.’

‘And so should you,’ Nora countered. ‘You’re not that much older than me.’

‘Now I feel like I’m repeating Mum and Dad’s cycle of family dysfunction, screwing my kids up by divorcing their dad.’

‘You’re definitely not. And the other day, I never meant to imply that you’re like Mum and Dad were with us. You’re not. You’re an amazing mum and your kids adore you.’

‘Thank you.’ They shared a moment though neither of them spoke. Kathryn cleared her throat. Are you due at the bookshop today?’

‘Yeah, but I’ll text Alex and let him know I need to be here.’

‘Please don’t tell him I’ve been ill.’

Nora held up her hand. ‘Can I just point out they already know you’ve been a little bit ill. And also, you haven’t been ill, you are ill. One day on antibiotics and feeling a tiny bit better isn’t completely recovered. But no, I won’t tell them about our little trip yesterday. I’ll just say we’re having a day together.’ They’d know something was up for sure, but Nora was confident she could blag it.

‘Thank you.’ Uncharacteristically, Kathryn’s eyes misted with tears.

Though she desperately wanted to reach forward and hug Kathryn, Nora wasn’t quite sure it would be welcome so continued to rub her shoulder. The bedroom door crashed against the wall and Avril and Ozzie flew in and onto the bed. Nora just about managed to catch Ozzie before he landed on his mum’s stomach. ‘Gently, you two. Mummy’s still feeling a bit poorly.’ They snuggled in next to her and Kathryn kissed their heads and nestled into their hair. Nora was tempted to pile on top. After a moment, she called them to order.

‘Come on kids, let’s go downstairs and sort out a lovely breakfast for Mummy, then I’ll take you to school. And if you don’t mind me using your car, Kathryn, I’ll swing by the cottage and grab us some reading material. I’ve got the perfect book for you. It’s a fabulous second chance romance all about a doctor and a nurse who meet at the same hospital after splitting up ten years before to follow their respective careers, then come back together when they’re assigned to the same ward. It’s brilliant.’

With big sloppy kisses the kids left Kathryn to snooze until her breakfast was ready. A stab of sadness hit Nora that she wouldn’t get to the bookshop today, but she was exactly where she needed to be: with her sister. Nora laughed out loud. They weren’t words she’d ever thought she’d say. Not in a million years. And at one point in time that was exactly how long she’d sworn it would take her to forgive Kathryn.

Chapter 20

The pub was already busy when Alex and Abe approached. The Rose was a new micro pub on the harbour arm and he and his dad had enjoyed the walk down in the evening sunshine.

A few fishermen sat clumped together, their lines out in the sea, waiting for a catch. Alex and Abe had never really been the fishing sort. They’d tried it a few times, but the endless waiting around hadn’t worked for either of them, though they had enjoyed sitting in the sunshine and reading their books. His dad would joke about his mum’s nagging and how it was nice to get away. Alex would laugh, knowing beyond all doubt that they loved each other. Nora never had that. When things were going well with her parents they tried to be like his Mum and Dad but ended up a pale imitation. He couldn’t imagine what is was like for her to know that it would all end soon when her dad left them again. She’d never really cried about it and he found that the saddest thing of all.

Opposite the sea, a line of restaurants and cafés spread along the length of the harbour arm to the very end, where the small lighthouse stood alone and abandoned. He hoped someone would regenerate it soon, as they had the rest of the place. Maybe a lighthouse could feature in his story somewhere? It would be an unusual setting for a murder. There was no denying Little Harbour was now quite the buzzy place to be.

‘You’re very quiet, Dad.’ Alex said, pushing a hand through his hair.

‘I’m still not sure of this whole book club thing. What am I going to do when you and Nora leave? I don’t know that much about books.’

‘I don’t know anyone who knows more about books than you, Dad. For someone who says they don’t use email, you use it to get The Bookseller’s emails every day. You know what’s coming out soon, what’s set to the hit big time, the newest debuts…everything.’

‘I did,’ Abe mumbled. The breeze was always a little stronger on the seafront and it ruffled his white fluffy hair as they strode along. ‘I’ve lost touch now, I think.’

‘Well, that’s easily fixed with a few days research. And no one’s expecting you to give lectures on this, just to get everyone together and help them discuss the book.’

‘I suppose lots of books have author’s notes and book club questions in the back, these days. I could always use that, couldn’t I?’

Alex smiled. ‘Definitely. That’s what they’re there for. It’s going to be fine, Dad. I think it’ll be fun and really good for you and the shop.’

They entered, and Alex arranged a couple of tables at the far end of the small pub for the book club. A few people had called into the shop asking about it, but other than that, as they’d left the invitation open, he had no idea who exactly would turn up. It might just be him, his dad and Nora. The idea of having a drink with Nora made him buzz with anticipation. He’d really missed her today. More than he should have given that they’d only been back in touch a short time. He’d messaged her a few times pretending he wanted to double check he was doing the things she had on her to-do list, but in reality, he’d just wanted to talk to her.

As it was a Monday night, the pub wasn’t very busy. Alex sent Abe off to get comfortable and went to the bar. Grabbing the pints he’d ordered, he took them to the table and waited for any others to arrive. ‘Dad,’ he said with a chuckle. ‘Stop fidgeting. It’s going to be fine.’

‘Why do I feel like this is an absolutely terrible idea?’ asked Abe, wrapping his hand around his pint glass. ‘What if no one turns up? We’ll be a laughingstock.’

‘No, we won’t, Dad. And if no one comes, you, me and Nora will have a drink and try again another time.’ Alex spied Nora in the doorway and waved to get her attention.

‘Hey,’ she said, coming over to their table, carrying a stack of books. ‘You guys ready? Has anyone else turned up yet?’

‘No,’ Abe grumbled. ‘Not yet.’

Alex flashed his eyes at her attempting to convey his father’s mood with one eyebrow.

‘Not to worry,’ Nora said cheerfully. ‘It’s only just half seven. I’m sure people will come along soon. It’s like parties, people always turn up a few minutes late because they don’t want to be the first ones to arrive. Like bring prompt makes them saddos or something.’

‘I can’t remember the last time I went to a party,’ said Alex, thinking aloud.

‘I can. Nora replied. ‘I went with Scott and got a bit too drunk. All I remember is bouncing off the walls going up the stairs to the flat and Scott helping me to get undressed. Oh, and quite possibly the worst hangover I’ve ever had.’

Alex felt a fire start in his chest at the thought of Nora getting undressed. Abe tutted in mock disapproval and Alex stood. ‘What do you want to drink, Nor?’ He had to place his hand on Nora’s back to squeeze between two tables, and the heat of the contact sent a jolt through his arm. He wondered if she’d felt it too but as he was moving behind her, he hadn’t seen her face. A second later she turned, but the way her hair fell made it impossible to read her expression.

‘It’s been a bit of a day so can I have a white wine, please?’

‘Large?’

‘Is there any other size?’

Alex headed to the bar and watched as Nora chatted to Abe. He always perked up when she was around, and now they were talking, Abe’s eyes were sparkling again. Nora’s were rimmed with dark circles, and he wanted to ask what had been happening, but he hadn’t quite felt able to. Not via text message anyway. He worried it was something bad, but their text banter had been jovial, and he hadn’t wanted that to end. He didn’t want to intrude if it was something private with Kathryn. Instead, he’d ignored the whole thing with the excuse that he’d ask her tonight. Ignoring things had become a well-used tactic lately. A prickle of shame inched its way over his skin, and he shook it off. Alex knew that, despite himself, he was getting more and more invested in Nora’s life, wanting her to be happy.

‘Can I help?’ Nora asked, suddenly appearing at his side. Her skin glowed under the orangey lighting, appearing so soft he wanted to rub his hand gently over her cheek.

‘If you like. So, this party you went to that you can’t remember, is that a regular occurrence?’

‘Not really. It was someone we work with. She was having a housewarming.’

‘Did you throw up behind a bush like that Halloween party when we were eighteen?’ He watched as Nora dredged up the memory.

‘Oh God! Will you stop reminding me of all the embarrassing things I’ve done?’

‘Hey, don’t feel bad, I couldn’t get out of bed the next day. I remember you coming over and sitting on the edge of my bed taking the mickey.’

‘I did, didn’t I?’ His breath hitched as she looked at him in a playful, almost flirty way. ‘But I’m only having the one tonight. I’m tired out and just about ready for bed.’

He tried hard not to picture her naked, cursing his brain for letting him down. How come it could conjure up things like that at the drop of a hat but when it came to writing his book there was nothing? ‘Everything okay today? I’m here if you need to talk.’

‘Thank you.’ She gently touched his arm, and he couldn’t tell if it was a friendly or flirtatious gesture. He really wanted it to be more and searched her face for signs, but as soon as his eyes scanned hers, she saw someone arrive and left him to it. His heart deflated like a punctured balloon.

As he returned with Nora’s drink, she came over to the table with the new arrival. He vaguely remembered the woman. There was something familiar about her face, but he couldn’t quite place her.

‘Alex,’ Nora beamed. ‘This is Becky. Do you remember her from school? We were besties for ages.’

‘Yes, I do.’ Alex handed Nora her drink and was despatched to fetch another for Becky. She looked happy and he suddenly remembered his dad telling him about ‘young Nora’s friend’ who had married another one of the lads from school.

This time, when Alex returned to the table, another lady had turned up and his dad was beginning to relax. She was older, more his dad’s age and friendly, but seemed uncomfortable in the pub environment. They’d all thought it would be more conducive to relaxing, but they might have to move it to the junk room – the reading room – he corrected himself. ‘Hi, I’m Alex,’ he said, trying to strike up conversation to make her feel more at ease.

‘I’m Mrs Truman – Fiona,’ she added, holding out a hand.

‘Lovely to meet you, Fiona. Do take a seat. I’m on drinks duty this evening, so please get comfortable.’

‘Shall we get started?’ asked Nora, placing her stack of books in front of her.

Fiona visibly relaxed and turned her attention to the rest of the group.

The smile Nora gave him before he headed back to the bar made his heart burst. He was living for moments like this more and more. When they were together, he’d crack jokes just to see her smile, play music she liked to watch her eyes light up, grab her favourite cake from the bakery to feel her joy as she ate it. He sucked in a breath. His dad still didn’t know about him and Cassie splitting up. Nora didn’t know either and all of a sudden, the peace his life had gained over the last week vanished and everything tangled into a mess. If only he could just sit them down and tell them everything, but that would risk the progress they’d made.

‘So, we want the book club to be relaxed,’ Nora announced, and Alex pushed his worries to the back of his mind. There’d be time to deal with them later. For now, he needed to concentrate on this evening. Fiona thanked him for her drink and Alex took a seat opposite Nora.

‘Hold on! Hold on!’ came a shrill voice from a wide-eyed woman who was advancing rapidly towards them. ‘Wait for me. I know I’m late but there wasn’t a way to sign-up or anything, so you didn’t know I was coming.’

Even though the woman’s tone was quite shirty, Nora smiled. ‘No problem. We didn’t bother with a sign-up because we want everything to be informal.’

‘Unorganised you mean?’

Alex ruffled but kept his mouth closed as the woman continued.

‘I definitely think you need a sign-up. I took the liberty.’ She pulled out some sheets of paper from the capacious handbag hanging from her forearm. She placed them on the table then looked around for a chair, grabbing one and placing it between Fiona and Becky. Fiona had already started moving her chair over but the force with which this extra one flew into the gap made her cry out when it hit her fingers.

‘Oh,’ the woman looked down at the chair as if it had made the sound. ‘Sorry about that.’

Nora flashed Alex a glance that said here-comes-trouble and turned her gaze back to their new member. ‘I’m Nora. Nice to meet you.’

‘Gladys Scrimsby.’ She thrust a hand out, grabbing Nora’s in a vice-like grip. Alex almost interceded when Nora’s fingers turned white but then Gladys let go.

He immediately realised she reminded him of those old-fashioned women who own twenty-seven giant hounds and gad about the countryside with a shotgun under their arm saying things like ‘What-ho’ and ‘Pip pip’. She’d make a great character for a book, he thought with a wry grin.

Nora began the introductions and tried to get the meeting back on track. ‘We want the book club to be something everyone enjoys and not feel like a chore, which is why we haven’t decided on a book yet. What we’d like to do today is just chat about how often everyone wants to meet and what sort of books they want to read.’

Alex realised Nora was talking like she was here to stay, and he liked it. She was a natural and as soon as she’d begun speaking, everyone’s eyes had been on her, and were listening to everything she said. She was wasted in her job in London. She deserved a job that made her happy.

Fiona cleared her throat and spoke nervously. ‘I suppose I’d like to read a variety of different books from different genres—’

‘Well, of course,’ Gladys interrupted. ‘That’s the whole reason for a book group.’

‘If we could just let Fiona finish,’ Nora said, keeping her voice light and encouraging Fiona to continue.

Fiona glanced at Glady before speaking. ‘Right, well, part of why I wanted to join was to broaden my horizon, otherwise I stick to the same genre all the time. I love romance and historical fiction.’

Gladys tutted. ‘Brain rot.’

Fiona turned a violent shade of pink and Alex saw a fire in Nora’s eyes. She loved all manner of books and all genres, knowing that one was no better than any other. He thought about saying something but before he could, Nora had replied, her passion for the written word coming to the fore.

‘I don’t think that’s true at all, Gladys.’ Gladys’s eyes widened at being questioned. ‘I think romance books are some of the best books ever written. Some of the most classic books of English literature are romance books. Even thrillers and action stories and murder mysteries have romance in them. It’s what we’re designed to do as human beings, isn’t it? To form connections with each other and…’ Her gaze fell on Alex and as it stayed there, he felt the pressure mounting, urging him to tell her how special their connection had been though they were too young to realise it at the time. ‘Be together,’ she finished a little hesitantly.

‘I agree,’ Abe said, with a firm nod of his head.

‘Me too,’ said Becky and Fiona was evidently grateful for the support. ‘I buy so many books because I hear I should read them and they’re amazing but when I do get time to relax, I always turn to the same thing. I love romance too, and thrillers, but I know I’m missing out on so many fabulous books. And ideally, for me anyway, we’d meet once a month. I can’t really commit to more than that because of Toby – my son – he’s eight months old.’

‘How lovely,’ cooed Fiona. ‘My grandson’s nearly a year.’

Gladys rolled her eyes but kept quiet.

‘Once a month is pretty normal,’ said Nora. ‘It gives everyone time to read the whole thing. We really don’t want people stressing over this. And even if you don’t finish the book, there’ll still be lots we can discuss. I really don’t want people feeling any pressure. The book club is all about enjoying books and reading and sharing that love with like-minded people.’

‘Will you come down for it?’ asked Becky, confusion drawing her eyebrows closer together.

Nora suddenly faltered and Alex caught a flash of panic fly across her face. He desperately wanted to know what she was thinking. How he hoped she was staying for good.

‘I – umm – I don’t know. I suppose I could do. Maybe. I’ve got work, you know.’ She shrugged and her eyes lost their glitter.

‘Wait,’ said Gladys. ‘You don’t actually live in Little Harbour? How can you possibly run the book club?’

‘It’ll be Abe that runs it. He owns The Book Nook. I’m just helping to set it up.’ Nora’s eyes were dulled with sorrow until she plastered on a smile, but her voice was a little flat. ‘What book do you want to read for your first meeting? I’ve brought some ideas with me. I thought some modern classics might be a good way to get you started.’

She’d changed to saying you instead of we, and Alex swallowed down the lump in his throat.

Taking the first from the stack he watched Nora summoning her usual happy personality. ‘This is a fabulous book. It’s called The Shadow of the Wind by Carlos Ruiz Zafón. It’s amazing. Have any of you read it?’

Fiona and Becky shook their heads, then Abe spoke for the first time, ‘A long time ago.’ He reached forward and took it from Nora, examining the cover, tracing the lines of text with his fingertips. He flicked it open and squinted at the text. He really needed his eyes checked. ‘I’d be happy to read it again. I seem to remember enjoying it a lot and thinking it a modern classic when I read it. Well done, Nora. Good choice.’

When the book was handed to Gladys, she put it on the table in front of her without even glancing at it. ‘I’ve got some ideas of my own, actually.’ Finding another sheet of paper from the pile she brought with her, she began reading out some titles.

‘Would you like a drink, Gladys?’ asked Alex, realising she didn’t have one and it would be the perfect opportunity to stop her attempts to take over. He was all for enthusiasm, especially about books, but she was taking it a step too far.

‘Orange and lemonade, please. I don’t drink alcohol.’ She eyed Nora’s glass.

‘Really?’ Nora asked, and Alex was immediately aware of the mischief in her voice. ‘I love a glass of white wine, though I prefer gin with breakfast.’

Fiona and Becky laughed while Gladys looked on horrified. His dad was happily studying the different books, enjoying the feel of them in his fingers. He’d slowly come round to owning an e-reader, but it had taken them a long time to get him there without worrying it would be the death of bookshops.

Their new little book group began chatting, passing the books around and discussing some of the other options, but The Shadow of the Wind had captured everyone’s attention apart from Gladys. She’d not exactly endeared herself to everyone, but they still listened to her suggestions. He even heard Nora say, ‘That might be good for our second choice,’ which mollified her slightly.

A man at the table next to them, who had been glancing over while Nora spoke, shuffled next to her. Alex felt himself straighten as something primal kicked within him. He wanted to take that place and put his arm around her. Let the man know that she was with him, but she wasn’t. Nora was technically nothing to do with him, just a temporary co-worker.

‘Excuse me,’ the man asked. ‘Are you forming a book group?’

The guy was handsome with swept back blond hair and perfectly proportioned features. To distract himself from his feelings, Alex imagined he was describing the man in a book: firm square-jaw, clean shaven. Too handsome for his own good came to mind. He found himself agreeing with Gladys when she shot him a look of disdain.

‘Yes, we are.’ Nora’s brightness made the guy edge closer.

‘I love books. Can anyone join? Do I need any special skills?’

Was he flirting? Alex felt the muscles of his arms and legs tighten. Who was this guy to come along and start flirting with Nora? He looked about the same age as them, but Alex didn’t recognise him. Nora didn’t seem too either.

‘Can you read?’ asked Gladys, her voice dripping with derision.

The guy laughed. ‘Just about. I can write too you know.’

‘No special skills required,’ Nora replied, diffusing the situation. ‘You just need to love reading and talking about books.’

‘Then where do I sign?’

Gladys shoved a piece of paper in front of him. ‘These are the sign-up sheets I designed.’

‘Thanks. I’m Chris,’ he said to Nora.

‘Nora.’

‘Beautiful name.’ He looked at her for a little bit longer than necessary, his eyes flitting across her features.

The guy chatted to her and was then introduced to everyone else. Alex shook his hand with all the friendly warmth he could muster but it was definitely jealousy he was feeling. Chris was nice enough with everyone, even talking to Abe for quite a while. His dad seemed to really like the guy, laughing freely at his jokes and relaxing in his company and Alex tried not to take it personally.

Then Chris moved deliberately closer to Nora’s side. It was the way he chatted with her and kept looking at her that worried him. Nora didn’t seem to realise anything flirtatious was happening and spoke to Chris with the same charm she spoke to everyone. Then they took out their mobile phones and his heart pounded like a prisoner striking the jail cell bars. They were exchanging numbers. He hoped Nora would be doing it with Fiona too, but Fiona was busy talking to Abe.

Alex turned away and lifted his glass to his lips. He’d never felt ant of this with Cassie. With her there’d been an urgency to their relationship, one that he realised now wasn’t the healthiest. The grief had been one thing, but it had also been tempestuous based on the idea that you had to enjoy the good times before they ran out, which they inevitably would. With Nora, he knew he had to act quickly so as not to miss his chance. He somehow knew that if they got together, they wouldn’t be working against the clock, yet how did he tell her he was falling in love with her again when she’d be leaving soon?

Chatter filled the air around him as the new book group bonded. All the while he kept a watchful eye on Chris. Alex knew he had to tell Nora how he felt about her before it was too late, but that meant telling his dad everything first. Knowing how much his dad had loved his mum, he’d want them to keep trying to make it work. He wouldn’t understand it had all been a mistake. There was no way he could risk the love they were slowly rebuilding. And if Nora didn’t feel the same way about him, he was looking at a lose-lose situation. Was it worth the risk? His heart said yes but a tiny part of his brain said no. Could he just ignore it? No, that wasn’t an option anymore either because he’d already fallen in love with Nora Bell all over again.

Chapter 21

By the end of the week, Nora had unboxed all the spare books and gift wrap from the junk room. With Abe minding the shop out front, Nora and Alex were now in the process of decorating it. They wanted it to feel cosy, so Nora had, with Abe’s permission, requisitioned some chairs from the living room. He had so much furniture he was happy for some to come down into the shop. It was a big step in the right direction as far as she could see. She’d tried saying so to Alex, but he’d given a fairly monosyllabic response.

Nora had left it after that and was now busy re-stacking books onto the painted shelves. She loved this and could do it forever. It was her idea of heaven. Just holding books in her hand made her feel whole. When she’d finished this, she would set herself the task of searching for cushions and beanbags for the Kid’s Corner. Over the other side of the room, Alex knelt, painting the last few bits of skirting board. They finally had some customers and could hear Abe talking to them. More and more were coming in every day, and some were even buying books. Everything about the shop seemed bigger and brighter. In fact, everything about life seemed brighter to Nora.

Kathryn was on the mend. The antibiotics were taking effect and they’d fallen into a happy routine of Nora picking up shopping and helping out with the kids. They were a lot closer than they had been at the beginning of all this. And even better, Scott was coming down tonight for a couple of days because he was missing her so much. Although she’d been busy, she was really missing him too. She’d loved seeing Becky and spending time with her, but their friendship was still sort of new and it meant you couldn’t just be yourself, warts and all. Scott knew her inside and out, and after living together for so long, they’d seen each other in such terrible states of hangovers and heartbreaks, she could tell him everything. He’d be full of advice about Alex and, Nora was even contemplating telling him about Kathryn and the things that had happened in the past. Right now, she felt able to let go of it. The pain had diminished, and it no longer seemed worth ruining everything for.

Glancing over at Alex, Nora wondered what was wrong. He hadn’t spoken much that morning and seemed distant and distracted. He’d brought her a croissant from the bakery and a nice coffee, as usual. These were gestures she appreciated and hoped they might mean something more, but rather than speak, he’d focussed more and more on his paintbrush. Nora frowned. ‘You’re very quiet today.’

Alex looked up as if he’d forgotten she was there. ‘Am I? Sorry.’

‘Everything okay?’ Alex leaned back and, where he was kneeling, the fabric of his jeans tightened over his legs. She quite fancied running her hand over his thighs. ‘Shall I open the window? It’s a bit hot in here.’

‘Is it?’

It wasn’t, but Nora’s skin might actually melt if she didn’t cool down. ‘So, what’s up? Something’s bothering you. I can tell.’

His hand paused, then he continued. ‘Just writing stuff.’

‘More toothpaste issues?’

A smile picked up the corners of his mouth, but he hesitated. ‘Something like that.’

‘Don’t worry, whatever it is you’ll figure it out.’

‘Huh, I wish I had your confidence.’

‘You will. You’ll do it. I remember when we were kids you always had a knack with words. Forever making up stories. I’m surprised you didn’t become a writer actually. Why didn’t you become an author? I always expected to see your name on a cover one day on one of the front tables at Waterstones.’

‘It’s not for the lack of trying, believe me.’

Nora paused. She let the book she was thumbing through close. He’d always been so driven and focussed, she was sure he would have achieved everything he wanted. As he hadn’t mentioned writing, she’d assumed he didn’t have that ambition anymore, not that it was something he wanted but hadn’t yet been able to achieve. ‘You mean, you still want to be a writer?’ Alex nodded. ‘So, what happened?’

Before speaking, Alex scratched his temple. ‘Writer’s block, which is ironic really because I don’t think you can call yourself a writer if you’re not doing any writing.’ He put the brush down. ‘I’ve had this story in my head for years… a crime novel. I know the characters and the plot and what I want it all to sound like but it just – I don’t know—’ He was clearly finding this difficult as he didn’t meet her eye. ‘I’ve got notes scribbled on bits of paper. I mean, there’s hundreds of them and I’ve got a notebook full of ideas, but when I sit in front of a screen to start that first draft, nothing comes out. It’s like the blankness from the screen leaches into my brain and wipes away all the thoughts and ideas I had. It’s my greatest ambition and greatest failure. Well, one of my greatest failures. I won’t bore you with the others.’

‘I had no idea,’ Nora murmured but she could sense his frustration and had to resist the urge to hug him. ‘You’re not a failure, Alex. You just haven’t achieved it yet.’

‘Part of me feels like I’m too old to start trying now.’

‘Nonsense,’ she sounded a bit cross and softened her tone. He’d clearly confided something that was important to him. The last thing he needed was a telling off. ‘You’re twenty-seven. And even if you were ninety-seven, if it was your dream, you should never stop trying to achieve it. The only people who don’t achieve their dreams are those who give up on them.’ She should take her own advice, she thought ruefully. She’d given up on her dream of working in a bookshop a long time ago and settled into a humdrum routine in a monotonous job she didn’t enjoy. The only good thing about it was working with Scott. ‘You just need to figure out how to get started.’

Alex shook his head. ‘It’s that blank page. It gets me every time.’

‘So write a different way.’

‘How?’

‘I don’t know. Write by hand? Lots of authors do that. Or try dictation software. I read an article recently about an author who writes all his books that way now and it makes the process so much quicker for him.’

His expression lightened. ‘I’d never even thought of that. Nora, that’s a brilliant idea.’

‘See, I’m not as stupid as I look.’

‘You’ve never been stupid and look as beautiful as ever.’

Caught off guard, Nora struggled to take a breath. Had he really just said that? She knew she wasn’t stupid, but the beautiful thing? Alex spent a long time dabbing his paintbrush into the tin of paint and wiping off the excess. He did it so many times Nora worried he regretted what he’d just said. She hadn’t realised how much she’d been longing to hear those words since he walked back into her life a couple of weeks ago. Was it possible to fall in love that quickly? Or at least, back in love, that quickly?

‘Which leads me onto something else,’ he said squaring his shoulders and taking a breath. ‘I really want to say how sorry I am for not staying in touch.’

The moment she’d been both hoping for, and dreading had arrived, and she met his gaze.

‘I’ve got no excuse. It was wrong. I was stupid. Cowardly. When I got to uni I was meeting all these new people – not girls. I don’t want you to think – anyway, I was suddenly joining a million and one clubs, going out every night with my new friends, I just kept putting it off. I assumed you were having as much fun as me. I knew how much you wanted to get away. I kind of convinced myself we were one of those first loves that are special, but people get over. I just thought we were too young to be tied to each other and rather than being brave and saying so, I just…’

‘Ghosted me,’ she mumbled, finishing the sentence for him as he didn’t seem capable, but she could tell from his eyes that he was genuinely sorry.

Immediately, a weight lifted from her chest. It wasn’t a great excuse, but it was an honest one. They’d both been so young, so caught up in what life should have been about.

‘It’s okay. I understand.’

‘You do?’

‘Yeah. I won’t pretend it didn’t hurt but I know exactly what you mean. I always wondered if you’d met someone else.’

‘No, Nora, I promise. It wasn’t like that.’ His eyes had widened so fully she almost laughed.

‘That makes me feel better.’

‘I am so sorry for hurting you. I’ve been ashamed of myself ever since.’

‘Time to move on, hey?’

Nora was secretly proud of how cheerful she sounded. Hopefully she hadn’t conveyed how difficult it had been to get over. His apology had been hard to hear, but she was glad she knew and, even more glad that he hadn’t just found someone prettier, funnier. All those things she’d feared most.

They fell into an uncomfortable silence loaded with expectation, hope and frustration. She almost left the room at one point, but just as it was getting too much, Abe walked in. His face glowing with excitement.

‘I’ve just had the most amazing chat with Fiona from the book group. She just popped in for a new notebook and a copy of The Handmaid’s Tale, and we came up with this amazing idea.’

‘Go on,’ said Nora, feeling her cheeks plump with joy. ‘You’re so excited you better tell me before you explode.’

‘Book dating.’

‘Book dating?’ she repeated. If Abe thought the phrase was self-explanatory, he was wrong. ‘I’m sorry, Abe, I don’t get it.’

‘Me either,’ Alex added with a shy look at Nora.

Abe adjusted his new glasses. All that squinting was aging him and now, with his fancy frames, he looked ten years younger. ‘It’s like speed dating but with books. We have lots of little tables set up with books and you get a few minutes to read a bit and then you have to move on to the next. We thought it would be a great way to get people reading books they might not usually try. Everyone should find something they fancy and if we offer a discount on the night, we should sell lots of books. We could do it once a month or something. What do you think?’

‘How do you know about speed-dating?’ asked Alex. ‘Actually, on second thought, maybe I don’t want to know.’

Nora stood. ‘I love it, Abe. I think it’s a fabulous idea. When were you thinking of?’

‘We were thinking next week, just before the grand re-opening.’

‘That’s not a lot of time,’ said Alex.

‘It’ll be fine.’ Abe gave a dismissive wave of his hand. ‘We can do it Tuesday night. Fiona’s already made some posters and is happy to put them around the town. And she’s organised some friends to come. Becky too. So, what do you think?’

‘I love the idea,’ Nora replied, standing up and giving Abe a hug. ‘It sounds like Fiona’s done all the hard work. What books will we have out? Or will people pick them from the shelves?’

‘We kind of hoped you’d pick the books, flower. After suggesting such fabulous titles for the book group, we thought you’d be better placed to choose.’

She nodded, thankful for the chance. ‘My mind’s racing already. We definitely need a mix of genres – romance and crime and historical fiction – new books and classics too – I’ll have a think. I’m sure if you ask Gladys, she’ll be more than happy to supply a list.’

Abe gave a mock shudder. ‘Is there any way we can expel her from the book group? I know we’ve only had one meeting but I honestly don’t think I can stand her. She’s such a bully.’

‘Not really, I’m afraid. We’re kind of stuck with her. We’ll just have to charm her over.’

Abe bustled out of the room and back to the front of shop and Nora heard him say, ‘They love the idea, Fiona. Well done!’

With Abe coming up with ideas like this and Kathryn on the mend, she wouldn’t be needed for much longer. As excited as she was to see Abe returning to his old self, a heavy weight settled as her excuses for staying began to run out.

Chapter 22

That evening Alex sat in Abe’s living room with his pen and notebook, scribbling furiously. For once, the words were flowing, and he couldn’t bear to stop. Occasionally, his hand would cramp, and he’d pause, shake out his fingers and stretch them then begin again, eager to take advantage of the flow of words that were leaping from his brain onto the page. He hadn’t written by hand since he was at school and there was every possibility he wouldn’t be able to read the words later, but he kept going regardless, filled with excitement as the story he’d dreamed about finally took shape.

Glancing up, he saw that it was dark outside. It had been light when he’d begun. How was that possible? Abe sat watching the television and had made him endless cups of tea throughout the evening. He didn’t speak often, giving Alex freedom, but he seemed content in his company.

That’s what it was, Alex realised now. It was a type of a freedom. A freedom he hadn’t let himself feel before. He was free to be creative. To put real life and all its troubles on hold and exist somewhere entirely different, as a different person, carving out and creating a life. The main difference was, when writing Alex had the power to create his own happy ending, or not, depending on the type of character they were. There was something simple about that. And though he knew getting these scribblings into anything resembling an actual story was going to take a lot effort, he didn’t care. He was willing and ready to put in the time.

But he was getting ahead of himself. He had a few thousand words right now. A lot more were needed to make an entire novel.

‘Right, I’m off to bed,’ Abe said, pushing himself up out of his chair. Alex’s head shot up to see it was already ten thirty.

‘I’m sorry, Dad. I haven’t been much company this evening, have I? I didn’t realise it was so late.’

‘That’s all right son, it was nice to see you doing something you enjoyed rather than frowning and staring off into space.’

He didn’t realise he’d been doing that. ‘I’m sorry. I’ve had a lot on my mind lately.’

‘You’ve been fine’ Abe said with a smile. ‘Now, goodnight.’

After his chat with Nora today, hearing her support and encouragement, finally apologising to her, he’d thought long and hard about telling his dad too. He’d only intended to write a few paragraphs, maybe a chapter at most, and then sit and speak to him but he’d got carried away. The only good thing about the words finally flowing was he didn’t want to lose that sense of freedom, and had grown ready to unburden himself of the other worries in his life.

‘Before you go, Dad. Can I just speak to you about something?’ He felt fifteen again talking to him about a problem at school.

‘Of course. What it is?’

Abe sat back down, and Alex put the pen inside the spine of the notebook and closed it, leaving it in his lap for courage. If he held onto it, maybe some of the freedom he’d felt while writing would seep in and give him the strength to do this. ‘I need to tell you something about me and Cassie.’

He nodded. ‘You’ve split up.’

Alex stared at his father, blinking. ‘How did you know?’

‘I’m not an idiot son. You’ve barely mentioned her, you haven’t called her and every time I’ve tried to hint at the subject you’ve changed topic. I rather gathered something was up when you came down on the spur of the moment without her.’

‘But you didn’t say anything.’

‘You’ve always talked about things when you’re ready. Even as a boy. I figured if I waited, you’d tell me when you were ready. It’s what your mum used to say to me. She’d say, “Abe, leave that boy be and let him come to you. If you push him, he’ll only push back.”’

‘Mum said that?’

‘She knew you inside out, son.’

‘Alex swallowed down the lump in his throat. ‘Do you think she’d be disappointed with me?’

‘Disappointed?’ Abe’s brow furrowed. ‘Why?’

‘For not making it work. Like you guys did.’

Abe let his head fall to the side as he thought. ‘Relationships end sometimes, son, there’s nothing you can do about that. You can’t hold on to something that’s not working or is making you miserable. She’d rather you were happy. That’s all she ever wanted for you. Muriel and I always knew how lucky we were to have found each other so young. Not everyone gets that.’

Alex felt tears sting the back of his eyes hearing him talk about his mum with such adoration. The changes to the bookstore had changed them both. Abe was finally breaking through that shell of grief he’d been wrapped in, and it wasn’t just a mental change either. His dad looked younger. His eyes were less pinched, his mouth turning up towards a grin. The air of loss that encircled him was falling away and as it lifted, he seemed more carefree. Alex never feared his dad would forget his mum, but he knew he couldn’t exist in sadness forever. His mum would have wanted him to be happy too.

‘Does Nora know about Cassie?’ Abe asked, sending a shockwave through Alex.

‘No. She doesn’t.’

He seemed to sense that Alex wasn’t quite ready to talk about Nora and Cassie in the same sentence. ‘So, are you staying here then?’

‘With you?’

‘Or in Little Harbour. You can stay with me as long as you like but you’re a grown man. At some point you’ll be wanting your own place if you’re here for the long haul.’

‘I hadn’t really thought about it.’ He’d only thought about staying here while Nora did.

‘And what about work?’

‘I can do my job from anywhere, really.’

‘You don’t fancy running the bookshop with me then?’

Alex’s notebook almost fell from his lap as he loosened his hold in surprise. ‘Me?’

‘Yes. If you’re here to stay that is. I’ll need the help soon. I reached out to an old friend in the antiquarian book trade, and he’s got a couple of commissions for me, if I want them. They sound quite exciting. One wants a rare book of maps and the other some old out of print academic text on alchemy. Pretty exciting, hey?’

If he was going to make a change then that change would be to carry on writing and see how long this new ability to get words on the page lasted. ‘You should ask Nora. She’d love a job like that.’

‘I would, but she’s only here for another week. She’s got her own life in London with that best friend she’s always talking about. She’s always been very clear on her feelings for Little Harbour and that mad family of hers.’

But with her parents away and her relationship with her sister improving, would she stay? Forever? The thought of it sent a chill over Alex’s skin. His heart beat hard against his ribcage. She’d not yet said she wanted to leave London and come home, but then again, she’d always wanted to work in a bookshop. She’d helped him at least start to realise one of his dreams, could he do the same for her? He wanted her to be as happy as she’d made him.

Beyond the window, a seagull called from one of the rooftops and the sound echoed around the marina, finally drifting out to sea. The darkness of the sky, only moderately different to the black sea, held a bright shining moon and stars glittered above them. Returning to Little Harbour had brought him more peace than he’d ever thought possible. Could it do the same for Nora? Was it even his place to try?

Chapter 23

The first thing Scott had done when he’d arrived was to have another soak in the big roll-top bath. Nora had put the prosecco on ice as soon as she got home and rather than trying to make a slap-up meal, had brought some extra pizzas and a bag of salad when she was doing Kathryn’s shopping after work. As she’d thrown in some treats for the kids for helping to look after their mummy, she’d also added a tub of expensive ice-cream for her and Scott too. They were a sucker for watching romantic comedies and eating ice-cream curled up on the sofa. The weather had turned a little chillier, the spring sunshine fading to overcast skies and colder nights, so she’d lit the wood-burner, ready for his arrival.

He’d waltzed through the door at just after eight and they hadn’t stopped talking since. She even sat outside the bathroom door while he soaked, regaling him with news of the bookshop, Kathryn’s trip to the hospital and her growing friendship with Becky.

Now they were downstairs, stuffing themselves with pizza and prosecco on the sofa (the bag of salad left unopened). Nora said, ‘I still don’t know what exactly is wrong with Kathryn, but at least we’re getting on a lot better. And the kids are gorgeous. I’ve loved getting to know them.’

‘Are you finally ready to tell me what happened between you two to make you hate each other?’

Nora took a sip of her prosecco, letting the bubbles pop on her tongue. ‘Maybe. If I can have that last slice of pizza.’

‘Go on then.’ He handed the plate over. ‘But eat it quick. I’ve waited years to hear this.’ Nora ate deliberately slowly just to wind him up. ‘Oh, come on!’

‘Okay,’ she said when she’d swallowed, even though it was hard trying not to laugh at the same time. As she came closer to saying the actual words, that familiar reticence came back but it wasn’t the same level of anger or hurt. In fact, she felt hardly anything in that regard. Only a small shooting pain down the back of her neck that vanished as quickly as it came and could have easily been sciatica from stacking books this morning. ‘Kathryn and I never really got once I hit ten. I always thought of her as this really bossy big sister with an attitude problem, and I think she resented me being the baby and not having the responsibility to look after everyone when Dad fucked off and Mum fell to pieces.’

‘That must have been tough for all of you.’

‘It was. I suppose for some families it would have brought them closer together, but it didn’t for us. I just remember Kathryn shouted all the time and I guess I didn’t really help out much. I was Dad’s favourite when he was home, and I think Kathryn resented that too. As we got to teenagers, and I started to realise what Dad was like, Kathryn was so angry I just stayed out of her way which means I didn’t help as much as I should.’ She took a deep breath. ‘Then The Incident happened.’

Scott topped up her wine glass but didn’t interrupt.

‘I came home from my first year at uni with a new boyfriend in tow. I was happy and I’d finally got over Alex ghosting me. Kind of. I’d got away from home but had to come back, because I was in halls and there was a delay in moving into a house for my second year. Bradley and I hadn’t been seeing each other that long but I was crazy about him, and he hated his parents too so came down with me for the two weeks. Now I look back with the benefit of hindsight, I wasn’t that in love with him, but he was my boyfriend, you know? She should have kept her hands off—’

‘Wait, Kathryn got it on with her own sister’s boyfriend?’

‘Yep,’ she replied with a sigh. ‘Though I was only out for an hour to get some shopping to make life easier for Kathryn. I came back and found them snogging – hands all over each other – on the sofa.’

Scott was wildly indignant on her behalf. ‘Jeez Louise! That’s some horrible shit. I can’t believe a sister would do that. Or a boyfriend! That is messed up. I mean—’

‘I know it’s bad, and it hurt like hell at the time, but the truth is, I can see now how Kathryn felt. She’s always hated the fact that she got stuck here, her life on hold because she was looking after me and the house. I can see how me being so happy to leave and then just popping back would have really got to her. Dad had just left us again with some woman he met in a club and Mum was having another meltdown. Kathryn carried so much weight on her shoulders.’

‘That doesn’t excuse it in my opinion.’ Scott plumped a cushion and held it in his lap, cuddling it. ‘Sisters don’t do that to each other. Ever.’

‘Believe me, I felt the same and have done for a long, long time, but I kind of think I wasn’t feeling pain over Bradley, it was the betrayal from Kathryn that hurt the most. Over the last few years things have faded. And since coming home I’ve been able to face all the fear I had that the hurt would come back stronger if I returned to Little Harbour.’

‘So how do you feel now?’

‘Seeing Kathryn again – helping her – I’ve come to understand all that she had to deal with. She protected me from as much as she could, and I never even thanked her for it. We were always being gossiped about, people talked about us all the time and Kathryn would have felt that more because she was older.’ Nora picked at her nails. ‘I just never thought about her as much as I should.’

‘Okay. I still think you’re being far too nice. Do you know what’s wrong with her yet?’

‘Not exactly, but I think if I give it time, she’ll tell me soon.’

‘And what about Alex? You’ve mentioned him quite a bit.’

She felt a sudden heat on her cheeks. ‘Well, he is Abe’s son and has been helping at the bookshop. I can’t not mention him.’

‘Yeah, but to come down as soon as he knew you were there and extend his stay just after you did...’

‘I don’t think he’d planned to be here for any set period of time. It could be just coincidence.’ Her tummy fluttered.

‘Nora, I can tell by your eyes and the way your neck’s going all pink and blotchy there’s more to this. Spill!’

‘Oh okay,’ she conceded. She’d been desperate to talk with Scott for ages. ‘He finally apologised to me for not staying in touch. He was so eloquent and genuine, and he is so handsome. I mean he was cute when we dated, but now, he’s like proper manly handsome. He’s got these cheekbones and such a gorgeous smile, and he confided in me he secretly wants to be a writer, which is amazingly attractive. And the other day he said I was beautiful. And urgh!’ She held a cushion up to her face and muffled a teenage screech. ‘I’m in serious danger of falling in love with him again, but I don’t know if he fancies me. He might just be being friendly.’

‘So, let me get this straight.’ Scott held up his hands to pause her. ‘He’s come back from York as soon as he knows you’re here, he’s prolonged his stay because you did, and now he’s told you you’re beautiful and apologised for hurting you all those years ago but you’re still not sure he has feelings for you?’

Nora blushed. ‘Well, when you put it like that it does make me sound pretty dim. What should I do though?’

‘You have to tell him how you feel of course!’

‘I can’t just walk into the bookshop tomorrow and say, “Hey, Alex, I fancy the pants off you and think we should try again. You know, second time lucky and all that.’ He might call me a psycho and drive straight back to York.’

‘Or he might sweep you up into his arms and kiss you till you can’t breathe.’

‘You read far too many books,’ Nora replied, shooting back the response she normally got from Scott.

He raised his eyebrows. ‘You won’t know until you try. And you better do it soon because you can’t extend your leave any more than you have already. You haven’t got enough left.’

It really was looking at being now or never as far as Alex was concerned. The last thing Nora wanted was to go back to London and lose touch again. They had a stronger connection than ever. Maybe if they’d stayed together, they’d be married by now, have a family…the list was endless. She didn’t want to lose the chance to start, or re-start, something special with him.

‘What are you thinking?’ asked Scott.

Nora shrugged. ‘That it’s time for bed.’ She had a lot of thinking to do and lying in that huge bed dreaming of Alex suddenly seemed very, very appealing.

Chapter 24

Desperate to make the most of her final week in The Book Nook, Nora and Scott had agreed that she would work Saturday morning, giving him time for a long lie-in, no doubt another lazy bath, and maybe a stroll through town, before Nora would join him for a spa afternoon. When she’d snuggled next to him on the sofa last night, he’d moaned her hair smelled of dust and she needed a treatment day. He’d then gone on to mention the state of her hands which were a bit red and sore from all the cleaning and painting she’d been doing.

Abe was just on his way out when she approached the door of The Book Nook. Glancing up at the old sign, she knew Alex was right that it needed a re-paint and as much as she loved the name, she had a feeling it wasn’t really as inviting and hopeful as it could be, but her mind was yet to settle on something suitable. Spying Alex behind the counter, her brain told her that nook was a bit like nookie, and she ignored the image that flew to her brain in favour of a deep, calming breath.

‘Where are you off to?’ she asked Abe as he held the door open for her. He was all done up in his walking gear again. Nordic poles at the ready.

‘I’m off for another hike this morning. I’m going the opposite way this time. To the other side of the cliffs where the flower farm is. I used to love walking around there with Muriel. Alex has packed me a lunch again, though I dread to think how much food he’s given me. I’m sure there’s more than last time.’

‘I bet you’ll work up an appetite. The winding path is brutal.’

‘It is, but I’m ready for it. Cheerio, flower.’

Nora walked into the shop, happy that he was taking the chance for another day off. She wasn’t sure what he’d do in the short term when there wasn’t anyone there to help. Alex had looked at the books and if they made their projected income, they’d be able to afford someone on a basic wage, but would they be able to attract anyone? It was going to take a lot of hard work to make it happen. She’d also noticed the way he’d said Muriel’s name without flinching or descending into sadness.

‘Morning,’ Alex called from behind the counter.

Nora replied while taking off her jacket and stashing it under the counter. ‘It’s just you and me this morning then?’ Saying ‘you and me’ sent a little thrill through her. ‘Will your dad be back to help out this afternoon once I’m gone?’

‘I think I’ll be able to manage. I have done it before you know.’

‘I’m sure you have, but have you been any good at it? That’s the question.’

The innuendo laden conversation hadn’t been what she’d anticipated but their exchanges had become increasingly flirtatious. It loaded the atmosphere around them with a sexual energy that she was becoming almost addicted to. In an effort to get her mind back on business, she said ‘Are you putting some music on today?’

‘I am,’ Alex replied. ‘I’ve even decided on a playlist.’

‘What have I got to look forward too?’

‘Nothing too strenuous, just a bit of a ‘best of’ from the year you turned eighteen.’

‘Sounds awesome,’ she replied with a chuckle.

The music started and Nora moved to one of the bookcases and began stacking books on the highest shelf. She’d started a new section called ‘Little Harbour Recommends’. It included any titles suggested by her, Abe, Alex and the book group. Though she’d had to be a bit selective when it came to Gladys’s extensive list. There simply wasn’t enough shelf space to include them all. Climbing up the rickety old set of steps, she said, ‘Can you hand me that stack of books from the counter, please?’

‘Sure.’

She waited for Alex to make his way over to her and planted her feet to stop them rocking. Alex handed her the books and she stood on the top step, reaching up to dump them on the shelf, but as she turned and extended her arms, the step rocked to the side and she fell backwards. Her heart raced at the feeling of falling, the books tumbling from her hands, and she stumbled down the two steps.

Alex grabbed her, and Nora collapsed into his chest. The instant her ear hit his torso she could hear his heart beating. He held her, one hand on her back and the other unintentionally on her bum. Longing pulsed through her body sending her already high heartrate soaring. Turning her head up just as he looked down, their faces were only millimetres apart. Her eyes fell on the perfect cupid’s bow of his lips, and she watched his eyes focus on her mouth. She’d never wanted to kiss someone so much in her life. She wanted to tip her head and invite him to do it but just as she did, familiar voices came through the open doorway.

‘Morning, you – oh!’

On hearing Fiona’s voice, Nora turned, and Alex’s hands dropped from her body. To stop them drawing conclusions she shouted, ‘I fell,’ a little too loudly and it echoed off the walls. Behind Fiona, she spotted Becky, biting her lip to stop from laughing, baby Toby strapped to her chest.

‘Morning, you two,’ Fiona said again, clearly pretending she hadn’t seen anything by studying the wall of books next to her. ‘You’ve moved the counter?’

‘Yes,’ said Alex, marching purposefully behind it. Nora quite fancied hiding there too as if the waist-height obstruction would offer some protection from the embarrassment prickling her skin. Fiona’s observation had given Alex the out he needed to move on. ‘We needed a clear walkway to the reading room, so we’ve replaced it with a much smaller one. To what do we owe the pleasure, Fiona?’

‘We bumped into each other in the supermarket and decided to have a coffee, then thought we should call in here and umm…’

‘That’s lovely,’ said Nora, trying to save her embarrassment.

‘Busy then?’ asked Becky, raising one eyebrow.

Nora ignored her teasing. ‘Not yet, but it’s definitely been getting busier, even with all the work going on. I think it’s stirring up some interest.’

‘I’ve definitely heard people talking,’ said Fiona. ‘What did you have in mind for the grand re-opening?’

‘Just a ribbon cutting. I figured the rest of the High Street would come out and that would probably be about it, so I didn’t want to make too big a deal.’

‘I think we should make a huge deal about it,’ said Fiona. ‘So many people are asking me about the book group—’

Baby Toby stirred from his slumber and with a smacking of lips looked up at his mum. ‘And a couple of my old friends have been back in touch about the book-dating thing. I was quite surprised really. Didn’t think it was their thing at all.’

‘That’s brilliant,’ Alex replied. ‘So, what are you guys thinking?’

Nora’s brain was suddenly crashing around with ideas. ‘We should definitely keep the ribbon cutting, but I think we should have some canapés and stuff to tempt people in and keep them here long enough to buy a book. I could order them from Lou’s on my way home today. I’m sure she’d do us proud.’

‘Can you get some of those palmier things she makes?’

Nora nodded and found her notebook from its place behind the counter to make a note.

‘I don’t mind helping out on the day,’ said Fiona. ‘Since I took early retirement, I get a bit restless. I don’t want to go back to work, but I’d love to help out at the bookshop.’

‘That’s brilliant, Fiona thank you.’

‘I could help out a bit,’ Becky added. ‘But I’m not sure Rob would be able to take Toby. I don’t know if he’ll be working.’

‘That’s okay.’ Nora said as she reached out and took Toby’s chubby little hand. ‘So, some of your friends got back in touch? That’s good.’

‘Yeah, it is. I realised I kind of shut them out a bit.’

‘That’s normal, dear,’ Fiona replied, sweetly.

‘I don’t know if I said,’ Becky continued, ‘But I had to go into to hospital to have Toby and he had to have antibiotics and observations after he was born. I used to have to wheel him round to special care for the injection and seeing all those little mites in there was heart-breaking. I felt so lucky but so worried as well that as soon as I got home, I kind of shut us both in to keep him safe.’

‘These things can take a while to get over. And he’s still so little. Give yourself time.’ Fiona was there again with just the right thing to say. She really did have a knack for supporting people.

‘I think you’re doing brilliantly,’ Nora added. ‘Don’t worry about re-opening day. Come along if you can and help out if you want. If you don’t want to or you can’t, it’s fine.’

Alex had obviously felt a little uncomfortable with the ladies all chatting like mother hens and had gone off to make tea. He arrived with a tray laden with cups and a teapot. His easy grin warmed Nora’s heart in a different way to the passionate fire their proximity had earlier. This was something entirely more wholesome and tender.

‘Has anyone asked Gladys about the re-opening?’ Alex asked. ‘She’ll have some ideas.’

‘That woman,’ muttered Becky.

‘I’m sure she doesn’t mean to come across as brusque,’ Fiona added.

‘You’re a very kind woman, Fiona,’ Nora replied, taking her tea and blowing to cool it. ‘So, it’s decided then? Next Saturday we’ll have canapés to go with our grand re-opening.’

‘And cake!’ Fiona said. ‘I’ll make a cake.’

Nora found herself just a little bit more excited than she had been before. A tiny, evil voice in her head told her she’d be going home the very next day, but she ignored it, pushing it back to the depths of her mind. Gripping tightly on to the feeling inside her, she enjoyed being surrounded by books and likeminded people. Then Mel crashed into the shop, pushing the door open so fiercely it almost rebounded off the wall.

‘I can’t believe you,’ she shouted, marching in and straight up to Nora.

Nora felt herself stiffen as everyone else took a step back. Fiona began examining the books nearest her. ‘Mel, what are you talking about?’

Mel’s snarl filled Nora with apprehension. It was like being in the playground and faced with a bully. A part of her worried that Mel might actually hit her.

‘I know Kathryn doesn’t want me to say anything, but I can’t keep quiet any longer. You should be absolutely ashamed of yourself. I can’t believe—’

Alex’s voice cut through her tirade. ‘Mel, perhaps you and Nora should talk outside or in the reading room.’ Mel glowered at him. ‘Please. In case we get any customers.’

‘Fine.’

Nora hoped her look of thanks was enough to show how much she appreciated his gesture before she led the way through. Once they were in the reading room, she turned to Mel. ‘I don’t understand what you’re talking about, Mel. I know Kathryn and I have had a rocky relationship but—’

‘Rocky relationship? Rocky. Relationship. That’s an understatement, isn’t it? I mean how could you do that to your own sister?’

Shame prickled Nora’s skin. She knew full well she shouldn’t have let old wounds fester the way they had, but it wasn’t really any of Mel’s business. ‘Mel, I appreciate you’re a friend of Kathryn’s but—’

‘I mean stealing your own sister’s boyfriend? That’s just – I can’t believe anyone would actually do that. Especially after all she’s done for you.’

Mel’s words faded in her ears. That’s not what had happened at all. It was the wrong way round. Had Kathryn told Mel that she’d been the one too…? The thought turned her stomach, but it would explain why Mel didn’t like her and why she’d been so unfriendly in the pub the night of the party. Mel was still angrily talking to her, but the words were yet to register as she had to think quickly about what to do. Though a part of her wanted to put Mel straight, she and Kathryn were only just beginning to get on again and that meant more to her than anything. She’d wasted too much time being angry and what would telling Mel actually achieve? She probably wouldn’t believe her and then Kathryn would be angry if the truth caused her and Mel to fall out.

Pulling her shoulders back and facing Mel, she said, ‘You’re right, Mel. It was an awful thing to do and the one thing coming back has done is let me apologise to Kathryn. It was the biggest mistake of my life and one I’ve regretted bitterly. I’m hoping Kathryn’s learning to forgive me now, so please, you don’t need to tell me how awful a sister I’ve been. I already know.’

Mel’s head moved back, and her jabbing finger dropped from between them. ‘Honestly?’

‘Yes. I hate what I did, and I was young and stupid, but Kathryn’s my sister and I love her, and my nieces and nephews, and I want to rebuild that relationship.’ She hoped she wasn’t laying it on too thick.

For a second, Mel considered Nora’s words before taking a step back towards the door. ‘Fine, but don’t mess her around again. Okay?’

Nora nodded as Mel marched off to the front of the shop. Heat radiated off her back and ran up her neck. She placed her hands on her cheeks feeling the warmth beneath her fingers. A moment later, Alex appeared.

‘Is everything okay?’

‘Did you hear everything?’

He dropped his eyes. ‘Sorry. It was hard not to, but Fiona and Becky have gone, they left just after you came in here, so they don’t know anything.’

Relief swept through her that they at least had left before her false confession, but she needed Alex to know the truth. ‘Alex, it isn’t true. I didn’t steal Kathryn’s boyfriend. She snogged mine, but she’s obviously told Mel it was the other way around.’

His brow furrowed into deep lines. ‘Why would she do that?’

‘Maybe she was embarrassed about what she did, but I’d never do that to her.’

‘I believe you,’ he said, their eyes meeting in a gaze full of meaning. ‘You really need to speak to Kathryn about this though, Nora. And I’d do it soon, before Mel does.’

‘You’re right. Do you mind if I go now? I’d like to see her and get this sorted once and for all.’ She brushed past him as she entered the doorway and as his hand touched her back, she felt a wave of desire so strong it nearly gave her a headache. Their eyes met again and the air between them felt thick with expectation. ‘I best go,’ she said, darting out of the shop and heading for Kathryn’s house.

Blinking in the bright sunlight and shielding her eyes, Nora marched on quickly, eager to get there and discuss what had happened. Should she have felt angry? A flicker of temper was trying to flame but the thought of ruining all the progress they’d made quenched it. It was disappointing that Kathryn had lied to Mel about what had happened, but it showed she was embarrassed and knew she was wrong. And if she felt that, it meant there was more of a chance of putting it behind them. Before she knew it, Nora was at Kathryn’s door.

Kathryn answered, looking better than she had in a while. Her hair was full and bouncy, tied into a ponytail and her skin was glowing. ‘Hi. I didn’t expect to see you today. I thought your friend was down.’

‘He is,’ Nora replied, keeping her voice light, though she felt her breath quivering in her chest. ‘Mel just came to the bookshop and spoke to me.’

With wide-eyes, Kathryn said, ‘Did she? Was she looking for a book?’

‘Can we sit down?’ Nora asked and Kathryn led her through to the living room. She perched on the edge of the sofa and Nora did the same. ‘She came to tell me off for stealing your boyfriend. She said she couldn’t hold it in anymore even though you didn’t want her to talk to me.’ Kathryn clasped her hands in her lap, the knuckles white. Nora reached out and put her hands over them. ‘I told her I was sorry for doing it and hoped you were starting to forgive me.’

Kathryn’s head shot up. ‘What? Why did you do that?’

‘Because I didn’t want to fall out with you again.’

Tears welled in Kathryn’s eyes. ‘I know I shouldn’t have. I told her my version years ago, just after you left. I was just so jealous. You were leaving, starting a life somewhere new with so many chances ahead of you and I knew I was always going to be stuck here. I’ve regretted it every day since. I was a terrible sister to do that to you. My shame stopped me trying to make the first move to sort things out and I kept thinking if you came home again, I’d make it up to you. But then you didn’t return and before I knew it, all this time had passed, and I didn’t know how to apologise for something that happened so long ago.’

Nora felt an electric shock shoot through her. She’d certainly hadn’t expected such an admission when she woke up this morning.

‘Then when you came down for Muriel’s funeral and didn’t bother coming to see us, I was so upset. I didn’t blame you exactly, but I took it for granted I’d get a chance to make things right and I felt so betrayed that you came all this way and didn’t want to see your niece and nephew, even if you didn’t particularly want to see me.

Nora had to take responsibility for that one. She had avoided coming down and that had prolonged the feud between them. Had she known her sister felt like this she might have come down sooner, but she’d always imagined Kathryn stood by what she’d done. Her sister had always been sure of her decisions and defended them to the bitter end even if they were wrong and didn’t work out. Nora had no reason to think Kathryn had felt differently about this one, but she was right, Nora could have taken the opportunity to see her niece and nephew and she’d let her feud with Kathryn stand in the way of that. It had been a petty, stupid thing to do and one she was regretting deeply. Guilt bit at Nora that it had taken her this long to get over one mistake, even though it had hurt like hell. It seemed so insignificant now and a lot of time had passed since then. As Nora was finding out, they were all different people now.

‘I’m sorry I didn’t come and see you all. And I feel so stupid for missing out on so much of Avril and Ozzie’s lives. Not to mention not being there for you when you needed me. You should have been able to talk to me when something happened and because I was so stubborn, you haven’t.’

‘I’m sorry, Nora.’

‘I’m sorry too.’

‘I’ll tell Mel the truth about what happened.’

Nora squeezed her hands. ‘Don’t fall out over it now. It was such a long time ago. It doesn’t matter anymore.’

‘It does. I’ll tell her the truth. She’ll be mad at me for a while, but she’ll understand. She’s my best friend.’

‘Only if you’re sure.’

Could it be that she and Kathryn were one step closer to being real sisters? Sisters who were more like best friends? She really hoped so.

***

‘You literally threw yourself at him?’ asked Scott that evening, doing his best to keep his mouth closed so his ultra-hydrating face mask wouldn’t slip off.

Nora had worried the atmosphere between her and Alex would be tense after their very physical interaction but thankfully, by the time she’d returned from seeing Kathryn, they’d had the busiest Saturday either could remember and had barely spoken. The reading room had been used, and the Kid’s Corner, and it was lovely to hear the shop filling with noise again. When Abe had arrived back from his walk, he’d barely dumped his backpack before he was in the shop, chatting to all the customers.

Now, Nora was stretched out on the sofa, with Scott at the other end, both of them attempting to talk while slimy facemasks imparted goodness into their skin. She hadn’t even got round to telling him about Kathryn yet. ‘I didn’t throw myself at him, I fell.’

‘But you said the stool only had about three steps. How can you fall down three steps? Actually, I know you. I can easily see how you’d fall down three steps. You did once lock yourself in the loo at work.’

‘In my defence, the lock was very sticky.’

‘What was it like?’

‘What?’ The mask slipped a bit and Nora tipped her head backwards.

‘Being in your ex, Alex’s arms?’ The pause as Nora considered her response was enough for Scott to read. ‘That good, hey?’

Briefly, Nora considered denying it, but what was the point? She’d be relying on Scott to comfort her next Sunday when she went back to London because she was pretty sure her heart would break on the train home. ‘It was amazing, Scott.’ She paused again. It was no good she couldn’t have this conversation with a slimy facemask slipping off her face and must have been fifteen minutes already. Peeling it off, she said, ‘I can’t even begin to tell you how much I wanted him to kiss me.’

‘Hey! Put that back on. You’ve got—’ He checked his watch. ‘Three minutes left.’

‘I’m sure my skin will be fine despite the three minutes.’

‘Actually,’ said Scott opening one eye too look at her. ‘Your skin’s been looking pretty good. I was expecting all the sea air to make you ruddy and veiny. Like a fisherman who’s been outside in bad weather his whole life.’

‘In the two and a half weeks I’ve been here? Really? You are such a city boy. Do you think that prosecco has chilled yet?’

‘We’ll get some in a minute, then it’s toes.’ He peeled the mask from his face. ‘I dread to think what your gnarly trotters look like now.’

‘Remind me again why I invited you down?’

‘To solve your love life problems.’

‘I don’t have a love life, so I don’t have love life problems. I’m going back to London next Sunday and Alex will be heading back to York. What future do we have?’

‘None at all if you don’t even tell him how you feel.’ Scott decided between the two nail varnishes he’d stolen from Nora’s room in the flat and handed one to her. ‘But if you do let him know, you might be surprised.’

‘You make it sound so easy.’

‘It is.’

‘It’s not.’

‘Is.’

She rolled her eyes. ‘Not.’

Scott threw his hands in the air. ‘Just tell him, Nora. What have you got to lose? And London to York isn’t that far.’

It may as well be the moon as far as Nora was concerned, because despite today’s contact and a bit of flirty banter he’d shown no inclination for wanting a relationship with her, or even carrying on their friendship after this was all over. ‘Can I have a glass of prosecco now please?’

Seeing her downcast face, Scott softened. ‘Okay then.’

‘Can I have it in one of this massive gin glasses we found in the cupboard?’

‘No way. I’m not staying the night if you have prosecco belly again.’

‘I’m not working tomorrow so we can have a lie in and what if I promise you breakfast in bed.’

Scott relented just as she knew he would. ‘Go on then.’

At least with her having tomorrow away from the bookshop she could think about what she was going to do. Could their two very separate worlds collide? Was it fate that had brought them together again now or just coincidental timing? She wasn’t sure she wanted to risk embarrassing herself even more to find out.

Chapter 25

How had another week flown by so quickly? thought Nora, as she made her way to The Rose for the book club meeting on Monday night. They’d started a little WhatsApp group and been chatting about the book through the week. She loved how engaged everyone was, though Gladys wasn’t quite as much as the others and her use of emoji was an interesting interpretation of their actual meanings. Nora also wasn’t one hundred percent certain about Chris. He seemed nice enough and was talking the talk on the chat, but she’d had a bit of a weird feeling about him in the pub, like there was more to him and not in a deep, poetic soul kind of way like there was with Alex. It put her on her guard.

Opening the door, she pushed the thought aside. Her heart thundered in her chest as Alex grinned at her. She’d thought long and hard last night after saying goodbye to Scott, going over and over what he’d said. This morning, she’d decided she was ready to tell Alex how she felt. She just couldn’t go back to her old life without trying first, even if the thought of him saying that she’d got it all wrong filled her with dread.

‘Hi, everyone,’ she said to the group. They’d agreed on meeting once a month, but everyone had read The Shadow of Wind so quickly, they decided to meet once more before Nora left them. ‘Where’s Chris?’

Becky nodded her head towards the bar. Chris was sat with a pint and from the unfocussed eyes that spotted her, he’d clearly had a few too many. How long had he been there given it was only 7.30 p.m.? Unsteadily, he came to join the group, but didn’t offer anyone else a drink. Alex took over the niceties and Nora bristled at the way Chris sat next to her as soon as Alex had vacated his seat.

‘I can’t believe how quickly you guys read the book,’ she said, pushing her worries aside. ‘What did you all think? Gladys?’ She might as well start with her and get the negativity out of the way.

‘Well, I was surprised.’

‘Really?’

‘Yes. I found the pace a bit slow, but overall, I liked it.’

The conversation took off and though Nora enjoyed it, she was mindful of Chris sitting uncomfortably closely. He’d chirp in every now and again with a fairly innocuous remark that sort of made sense, but Nora could see he was blagging. He hadn’t read the book. She bit down the annoyance that was taking hold. Who joined a book group and then couldn’t even be bothered to read the book? Gladys might be a bit challenging but there was no doubt that she loved books as much as anyone else. Nora knew Chris hadn’t joined to make new friends. She could believe that of Fiona and Becky, even herself, but they weren’t the type of people someone like Chris would want to be friends with.

The group were called to order and Nora was incredibly surprised to see Abe pulling out some notes from his coat pocket. He unfolded the bundle of papers and flattened them on the table. He’d made notes on the text, notes about the author, even notes about how the novel was received, all in neat sections with underlined subheadings. She shared a meaningful look with Alex. It was clear he felt the same way she did happy to see Abe engaged with the group.

‘I’ve done a little research,’ he began. ‘And I think we should start by talking about the authors use of parallels. The way he parallels the character’s lives—’

Gladys, clearly impressed by Abe’s question, and quite possibly, his notes, said, ‘What a good question, Abe. I thought…’ And she launched into a monologue about it.

At first, Nora was worried that Gladys’s forceful opinion would put the other’s off but in fact, it had the opposite effect. They listened intently and then the conversation took off like wildfire. Perhaps it was not having the pressure of being the first to speak. Nora had experienced that enough times on awful training courses at work. Though she’d discovered if you volunteered for the first horrible participatory task, you got an easy ride for the rest of the seminar.

About halfway through the evening, as they were discussing the Cemetery of Lost Books, Nora watched Alex reach into his coat pocket and pulled out his mobile phone. She had no idea who was calling, as he was careful to shield the screen, but he glanced at her, sorry for the interruption and swiped to reject the call. That should have been the end of it, but the phone went off twice more before, with a resigned nod, he pulled it out again, and walked outside.

Nora tried to bring the meeting back to order but struggled to focus, thinking about Alex and whatever that call could be. She wondered if it was a new job offer, but they were unlikely to be calling at this time of the evening. He’d never mentioned a girlfriend all the times they were talking so she knew it wasn’t that. Maybe it was something to do with his place in York? Whatever it was, she hoped everything was okay. A moment later, Alex shot back in. From the way he was holding his phone towards his chest, she knew he was still on the call.

‘Sorry, everyone. Sorry, Dad, but I need to take this, and I might be a while. Do you mind if I head back to the shop?’

‘No, son,’ Abe said with a flash of concern. ‘See you later.’

When everything was done, and all topics exhausted, Nora suggested their next book with a heavy heart because she wouldn’t be here to join in the discussion, and they called the meeting to a close. Abe headed off with Fiona and Gladys who surprised them all by saying, ‘I really enjoyed that,’ as she pulled on her coat. Becky hung back for Nora while Chris was busy necking the last of his pint. Unless he showed a genuine interest in the books, she was going to have to suggest he find something else to do with his time. She chided herself for thinking in the long term again. It wouldn’t be her decision after the end of this week.

‘Nora,’ Chris called, as she was about to head off. ‘Can I have a word?’

She rolled her eyes at Becky. ‘Sure, Chris. See you later Becky. You might as well head home.’

Turning back to face him, she said, ‘Everything all right?’ With any luck he was going to say he wanted to quit the book club. It clearly wasn’t his cup of tea, and she still couldn’t figure out why he’d joined in the first place.

‘I thought we could walk back together and have a little chat?’

‘Of course.’

Awkwardly they strolled along the harbour arm, the strong evening wind blowing through her hair. She pushed it back as it whipped into her face and waited for him to speak.

Chris leaned towards her, his alcohol laden breath carrying on the breeze. ‘A little bird told me you were going back home soon?’

‘Yeah,’ she said with a sigh. She didn’t want to talk to Chris about this. If she was going to talk to anyone it would be Becky or Alex. Maybe even Kathryn. ‘I’m leaving at the end of the week. I live in London.’

‘Cool. Your boyfriend waiting for you there?’

A warning bell rang in her head. She really hoped he wasn’t going to ask her out on a date. Sozzled men dripping in beer weren’t her thing. ‘No, but I’m not really in the market for one right now anyway.’ There. That should tell him everything he needed to know.

‘Good.’ He laughed more than necessary. ‘I’m not in the market for a girlfriend either. But there’s nothing wrong with a bit of fun is there?’

Urgh! Nora resisted the urge to curl her lip. Luckily, they were now near the marina and she could head off in another direction. She could even head towards the shop to check on Alex. Anything to get away from him. As the street narrowed and the shops loomed over her, Chris’s arm wrapped around her shoulder’s, and she tried to shrug it off.

Exposed in the darkness, fear gripped her throat. ‘Chris, you’re a nice guy,’ she lied. ‘But I’m just not interested in any fun.’

‘Course you are,’ he squeezed her tighter and when she tried to move away, he pushed her into a doorway and began kissing her neck. He was like some horny teenager and his wandering hands were pawing at her, rubbing her clothes up and down.

‘Get off me,’ she shouted, pushing him back as hard as she could. He stumbled, clearly surprised his moves hadn’t worked. Nora immediately began walking towards the shop.

‘What? It was just a kiss.’

‘Leave me alone, Chris,’ she called over her shoulder ignoring the fact that her body was shaking, and her legs wobbled so violently they might give way. ‘And don’t ever come back to the book club. Ever. If I even see you in the pub when we’re there I’ll pepper spray your eyes out.’

‘Don’t worry, I won’t,’ he shouted back at her. ‘I was only there to get with you anyway.’

Within minutes, Nora found herself at the bookshop. She banged loudly on the door, thankful Alex was the one to respond. As soon as he saw her face, hot and angry with a few tears welling in her eyes, his surprise changed to concern.

‘Nora? What the hell? Are you okay? What’s happened?’

Angrily, Nora brushed the tears from her cheeks and edged around the door. ‘That Chris,’ she stuttered. The shock of what had happened was catching up with her and as the anger wore off, in its place grew vulnerability and panic.

‘What did he do to you?’ Alex’s hands cupped her face, and she allowed herself to fall into him. She wanted to be held by his strong, caring arms and bury her head against that broad chest. ‘If he’s hurt you, I’ll—’

He studied her face, and she raised her eyes to meet his. ‘He just came on too strong. He pushed me against a doorway and—’

‘What? That creep. That’s it I’m going to find him and—’

‘No, Alex, please.’ She grabbed hold of his sleeve, pulling him back. ‘Just leave it. I’ve told him not to come back to the book group.’

Alex wrapped his arms around her again. ‘He’d better not. How dare he treat you like that?’

The pain in his voice made her look up once more, she could feel his warm breath on her face. His eyes dropped to her mouth and his hand rose to cup her cheek. All he needed to do was guide her a little towards him. His mouth edged closer to hers and their lips met. A fire started inside her and swept through her body. It was blissful and serene and yet powerful at the same time. Then he pulled back, and his hands dropped from around her face.

‘Nora, I’m sorry. I can’t—’

Her heart felt like a window suddenly smashed by a stray football. It exploded into tiny pieces and fell around her feet. She’d read it all wrong. All those things she and Scott had discussed were just coincidences. Happenstance that didn’t mean anything, as far as he was concerned. Nora’s face flamed. ‘No, I’m sorry, Alex. I thought – but—’

‘It’s not you. It’s just I’m—’

‘It’s fine. You don’t have to explain.’

‘I want to,’ he pleaded.

‘Honestly Alex, just—’

‘I’m married.’

A choked sob sprang from her lips. Her mouth went dry and she tried to swallow but the pain formed a giant ball in her throat. ‘You’re married?’ Tears welled in her eyes afresh. ‘How can you be married? You don’t wear – you never even mentioned—’

‘It’s complicated, Nora.’

Anger erupted in a growl. ‘Complicated? Like my dad’s many women were complications? You—’

‘It’s not like that, Nora. I didn’t know what to say. I didn’t know what to do.’ The glower she gave only hinted at the rage she felt towards him. ‘I’m so sorry.’

No words could express the pain and humiliation coursing through her body. It was like lava. Boiling hot rage solidifying into stone cold pain that settled in the pit of her stomach, grounding her to the spot. Every muscle hurt and her brain had frozen on that one word married. How could he be? It just didn’t make sense.

Alex stared at her in the darkness of the bookshop. She wanted him to say something to make this all better. Something to lessen the anguish that he wasn’t who she thought he was. But Alex seemed as lost for words as she was. When the lump in her throat finally shrunk enough that she could speak, she muttered, ‘I can’t believe you’d keep such a secret from me. When you know everything about me, everything that’s happened with Dad, and now with Kathryn. I have to go.’ She barged past him eager to get away, to breathe cold night air that wasn’t sullied with lies and betrayal.

‘Nora, wait, please?’

He followed her to the doorway, but she didn’t look back. She’d be in the safety of the cottage in a few minutes. He called her again, and the pleading in his voice almost halted her. If she didn’t keep going, she’d falter. Her time at the bookshop was over and if Kathryn could spare her, which she was sure she would, she’d be back to London the next day.

Chapter 26

Alex knocked on the door of his old home, his eyes tired and gritty. The long spans of motorway had been hard to traverse when exhaustion pulled at him, but he’d opened the window to feel the fresh air on his face and thought only of Nora. He’d driven through the night to speak to Cassie. To tell her once and for all that everything was finished. That it was over and as much as she might wish it, they couldn’t go back. Their time had run out and the relationship had run its course. He wanted her to be happy. She deserved someone who loved her wholeheartedly.

It wasn’t the kiss with Nora that had convinced him. The phone call he received during the book group had already done that. She’d been talking of plans they might make, and he had to make her see once and for all enough was enough. As he waited for Cassie to answer the door, he wondered how different the night would have been if he’d stayed there with Nora so that scumbag Chris hadn’t been able to get close. If he’d come back to meet his dad and maybe even walk her home, she wouldn’t have gone through such a horrible ordeal. His fists tightened just thinking about it. If he could get hold of that man, he’d have more than just a bruised ego to deal with.

The state Nora had been in sent an icy blast down his spine. He wanted to reach in and remove all the hurt and traces of pain. The protectiveness he’d felt had been overwhelming, firing his emotions into overdrive: the longing, the passion she ignited, the love. And then he’d allowed himself to kiss her. In the seconds before their lips had touched, he’d known he should tell her everything. Admit about Cassie and the fact that his marriage was over.

They’d been broken up officially for months, but it had been clear shortly after their Vegas wedding complete with Elvis impersonator, they’d made a mistake. Only knowing each other for nine months was nowhere near enough time to understand someone fully. Particularly someone you were going to spend the rest of your life with. But grief had over-ridden common sense and by the time they returned he couldn’t just divorce her. They’d tried hard not to bicker. Tried hard to get along. But they just weren’t meant to be. Over the next eighteen months, the marriage had faded to nothing more than an awkward living arrangement and it was then he’d taken the decision to move out.

Cassie hadn’t liked it. She didn’t want a marriage that hadn’t even lasted two years. She wasn’t the type to give up and in a lot of ways it was a quality he admired. When she called last night, she’d asked him again when he was coming back – when they could try again. He’d tried to tell her gently, tried to make her see that she’d got the wrong end of the stick, but she wouldn’t let go. Just as he was getting through to her, or so he thought, he’d heard the banging on the door and told her he had to go.

Anger and longing shot through him as he thought of Nora. Then guilt at the way he’d just stupidly blurted out that he was married. In the moments that followed he should have explained but he couldn’t find the words. Some writer he was going to be. The only thing he’d been able to write was a note for his dad saying he’d had to pop back to York to sort something out but would be back home as soon as he could. He hoped it would be tonight, but he wasn’t sure and didn’t want to promise. In his mind’s eye, Alex could picture his dad’s reaction upon reading the note. He would probably be looking at it right now. It was only just seven. He could imagine Abe’s consternation and frustration that he’d disappeared without speaking to him. The disappointment. But soon Alex would be back in Little Harbour once and for all and would explain everything. He was done letting his dad down. He was done failing his mum’s memory. She’d always thought Nora was the one for him and he’d discovered it for himself now. Amongst the regret, he felt she’d be proud of him for sorting out his mess and grabbing hold of life again, but this time, with the right person by his side. He was sure that person was Nora Bell and that it always had been.

The door opened and a sleepy looking Cassie blinked at him in the morning light.

‘Hi, Cassie.’ Her face suddenly brightened as she tightened her dressing gown around her, and he realised that driving through the night to see her might give the opposite message to the one he intended. Quickly, he said, ‘I really need to talk to you.’

He hoped his tone would convey the gravity of the situation and that it wasn’t going to be the outcome she wanted, but it obviously hadn’t when she smiled and said, ‘Come in.’

Alex followed her through the house that had been theirs. It should have felt familiar with maybe a touch of loss too. The oatmeal-coloured carpet they’d liked when they moved in, splitting the rent, the light-coloured curtains, the creamy sofa. It was all quite non-descript. It didn’t feel like he was coming to a home he’d shared with a wife. It felt more like a hotel or a neighbour’s house, confirming to him that his life wasn’t in York anymore, it was in Little Harbour. She didn’t have any pictures of them up on the mantelpiece and he wondered if she’d taken them down or thrown them out. She’d been so angry when he’d said he thought they should call it a day.

‘I thought you were in Little Harbour?’ Cassie said, sitting primly on the sofa. She wrapped her arms across her chest defensively. Or maybe she was feeling exposed in only her dressing gown.

‘Did you want to get dressed before we talk?’

She shook her head. Maybe she could sense what he had to say wouldn’t be the news she’d been asking for the night before. He sat down opposite her, his coat still on.

‘What did you come to talk to me about?’

Alex noticed his hands were shaking in his lap and he tried to control them. He’d never felt such nerves and queasiness before. ‘I’m really sorry, Cassie, but I’ve come to ask for a divorce.’

She gave a double take as if she couldn’t believe he’d just said the words out loud. ‘What?’ Cassie shot to standing, her stance changing from curled in surprise to standing her ground in anger. ‘You’ve driven all this way to tell me you’ve changed your mind and you don’t actually want to get back together; you want a divorce?’

‘Cassie, I never said that when I came back, we were going to get back together.’

‘You did. I’m sure you did. Or if you didn’t, you said everything but. You definitely gave me that impression. You—’

He’d tried everything not to give that impression. ‘I really am so sorry, but I think it’s for the best.’ Alex suddenly thought of Chris and the way he’d treated Nora. That wasn’t how a man treated a woman. He thought of his dad and how he’d always treated his mum, with honesty, integrity and an inner courage Alex had taken for granted. If he could be anything, he wanted to be a man like his father. Squaring his shoulders, Alex said, ‘It felt wrong to tell you over the phone and I can’t tell you how sorry I am.’

‘It was cowardly and hurtful. I – I still love you.’ Her watery eyes bored into him.

‘Cassie,’ he said softly, shaking his head. ‘It might have been love at first, but we both know that it’s been dwindling for a long time.’

The tears began to roll down her cheeks. ‘You kept me hanging on a thread until you could summon up the balls to actually tell me. I hate you.’

‘I don’t blame you. I’ve never wanted to hurt you, but we both know I pushed us before we’d got to know each other, and because of that we made all the wrong choices. This whole mess is entirely my fault.’

‘Yes, it is.’ She went to the window where the curtains were still drawn and flung them open. The light flooded the room making him squint. As she stared out into the street, the burst of anger seemed to fade. ‘It’s really over?’ He wasn’t sure if it was a question to him or if she was speaking to herself. Then she said, ‘Is there someone else?’

How did he answer that? And how hurtful would that answer be? He didn’t want to mess with Cassie any more than he already had, albeit unintentionally, but would it do any good to tell her about Nora? Not now, surely. And what could he even say? That he hoped there would be? Was it even possible? She must hate him for pulling away from her last night and dropping this bombshell, but he wanted to try. His pause told Cassie all she needed to know.

‘There is, isn’t there? Who is she? Does she live in Little Harbour? How long has it been going on? I can’t believe—’

‘Cassie, wait. There’s someone I know but we’re not – it’s not – she’s just a friend. We only met again when I went back.’

Anger changed her expression, and her mouth became a thin angry line. ‘So that’s what changed your mind—’

He’d gone and done it again. If he was an actual writer, he’d write this scene completely differently. He’d speak in full sentences like a grown up and not keep making things worse. He took a deep breath, ensuring his tone remained even. ‘We both know we’re not meant to be together Cassie. You haven’t been truly happy since we came back from Vegas and moved in together. I mean, that should have told us something. We got married when we hadn’t even lived together. We rushed everything and have done nothing but make each other miserable. The good times were really good, and I’ll treasure those memories. But I think it’s best that we move on.’

‘I can see you’ve made your mind up.’

‘I have.’

She walked to the living room door and pointed out towards the hallway and the front door. ‘Then you better go.’

Alex walked out, pausing when he came level with Cassie. He wanted to say something meaningful, but he couldn’t think of anything that wouldn’t come across as pretentious. He hoped that the main character in his novel was going to be better at this than he was. ‘I’ll, umm…I’ll sort out a solicitor and get the paperwork sent to you.’

She didn’t answer but he heard the front door slam shut behind him and glanced at the window as he climbed back into the car. Cassie wasn’t there watching him which he took as a good sign. Now he had to drive back and figure out what he was going to say to Nora.

Some sleep was required first though. Having spoken to Cassie he felt exhausted. Adrenalin had kept him going through the night on the long drive. Adrenalin and coffee. But now he’d finally said the words out loud it was like a weight had lifted from his shoulders and tiredness suddenly swamped him. He wasn’t safe to drive.

As he headed back to his flat for a sleep, he pictured Nora’s face. At first all he could see was the shock and hurt from last night, but he forced himself to picture her laughing as they worked in the bookshop together or picking cakes for their lunch from the bakery. The happy times. He desperately wanted more of them. More than anything else in the world to hold her again, but it was going to have wait until tonight, even though tonight seemed like a very long time to wait.

Chapter 27

Nora put her phone back into her coat pocket as she walked into Kathryn’s house, following her through to the kitchen. She’d told Abe she’d be there soon but had to drop off some shopping to her sister first. The truth was, she wasn’t sure what to do and the thought of being in the bookshop she’d soon say goodbye to in a matter of days, knowing Alex had already left, hurt like hell. She could only assume he’d gone to York and back to his wife.

It was still beyond belief. How could he be married? How could he have a wife and never have mentioned her? How could he have kissed her when he was already with someone else? She’d never had him down as a cheater and saying the words put a sour taste in her mouth.

The surge of feelings was so reminiscent of how her mum would have felt when her dad upped and left, she almost couldn’t bear it. Kathryn would probably try and remove Alex’s parts with practically anything she had to hand if Nora told her what had happened. Especially with her husband having only just done it to her. Why were men like this? Nora had always thought Alex one of the good guys, but it was all a sham, or a dream she’d made up based on memories of their short time together so long ago.

After he’d dropped his bombshell, she’d walked back to the cottage in a daze. Nora could safely say yesterday evening had been one of the worst of her life. She didn’t throw the word traumatic around very easily, but it certainly had been. Back at the cottage she’d expected Alex to come banging on the door, eager to explain what the hell was going on. When she’d realised that wasn’t going to happen, disappointment and anger had taken over.

‘I got your shopping,’ she said, feigning a cheerfulness she didn’t feel.

‘What’s wrong, Nora? You look like you’ve been crying.’

‘Oh, nothing, it’s fine.’

There was a time when that would have been enough to end the conversation. A get out clause for both of them.

Kathryn cocked her head. ‘It’s definitely not fine. You look like a deflated balloon but with red eyes. Sit down and tell me what’s happened?’

The ground shifted beneath Nora’s feet. The genuine concern on Kathryn’s face and the way she was motioning for Nora to sit filled her with happiness. No matter what happened with Alex now, at least the mending of their relationship was one good thing to come out of all this. And of course, the bookshop was doing much better. Nora flopped into the chair and told Kathryn everything about the night before.

‘I tried ringing Alex this morning—’

‘I hope you were ringing him to tell him he’s an absolute idiot, and never to come near you again.’

Nora sighed. ‘I don’t really know what I was going to say, but he’s not responding. Abe said he’d left a note that he’s gone back to York to sort something out.’

‘For good I hope.’

‘Who knows. He’s disappeared and even if he came back what would I do? What would I say? He’s married, Kathryn.’

‘He’s a cheat. Just like Dad and just like my ex.’ Kathryn’s voice carried all the same emotions Nora herself was feeling as she angrily unpacked the shopping.

‘Some men are for sure. I just didn’t think – have never thought – Alex was one of them.’

Kathryn continued as if she hadn’t heard, but Nora didn’t mind. It seemed to be cathartic for her. ‘Every time Dad left it would destroy Mum. Then he’d come back, and they’d pretend everything was fine. She’d pretend she was happy, when in reality she’s always felt like he settled for her. Like she was the runner-up prize when all his other dreams hadn’t panned out.’

Nora frowned. ‘How do you know that?’

‘I overheard her once. You were at uni and I nipped in after work to drop something off. I can’t even remember what it was now, but I remember her words so clearly. Dad had gone and she was walking around the house talking to herself. She said she was worthless and would never be good enough.’

‘Sometimes I think she’d have been better off leaving Dad. Do you think they’re happy now?’

Kathryn shrugged. ‘I don’t know. Dad has changed now he’s realised he’s not the bee’s knees anymore and I guess Mum feels safer because of that. He hasn’t gone off or had any affairs I know about in years.’

‘Maybe he’s changed?’

‘I think it’s more she’s just waiting, you know, for the next time.’ Kathryn sighed and glanced at her sister. ‘How serious was it? Were you falling back in love with him?’

Heartbreak sprang afresh, stabbing into her heart. ‘Yes – No – Yes. It doesn’t feel like falling back in love because we’re both such different people now. I was falling in love with grown up Alex. But he’s married, and he never said a word. I might even have stayed here if there was a chance at a life with him, but now—’ She sniffed and wiped her eyes.

‘Now you’ll be going back to London on Sunday?’

‘Unless you need me? But I’ve run out of annual leave, and I can’t extend it anymore without risking losing my job. If you’re still not feeling well, I’ll be here, and they can stick it.’

Kathryn smiled. ‘You sound like me.’

Nora brushed her dark hair back from her face. She’d kept it down so it would hide her pallid complexion. ‘I do a bit, don’t I? Maybe that’s not such a bad thing.’

‘You don’t need to stay for me. I’m on the mend now. I’ve got the doctors in a couple of days for another check-up but apart from that I feel almost back to normal.’

‘Good.’

Kathryn came and sat at the table with Nora. ‘What are you going to do about Alex? It may not be as simple as it seems. Marriage is complicated and sometimes it doesn’t work out. Maybe there’s more to this than meets the eye.’

‘I don’t know. He might not even come back. I might never see him again.’

‘Maybe that’s a good thing?’

Then why did her heart hurt so much at the thought. She had to know why he hadn’t told her.

‘Do you want to go back to London?’ Kathryn asked gently. ‘I kind of get the feeling you don’t.’

‘If I could stay here and work in the bookshop then I’d definitely stay. It’d be like a dream come true, but I don’t think that’s going to happen. I’m just going to have to go back to London and my job and hope that one day I can work in a bookshop that pays enough.’

Kathryn’s hand reached out and covered Nora’s. She raised her head to see genuine concern in her sister’s eyes. ‘I’m sorry it hasn’t worked out for you.’

‘I’ve always believed in fate but this time it really sucks.’

‘It definitely sucks. As you’re going back, I should probably tell you what’s been happening with me. Especially as you’ve done so well not to ask.’ There was a glimmer of amusement in her sister’s eyes. ‘You could never stand not knowing stuff and used to pester me all the time when you were little. It would mainly be about when Dad was coming back and when Mum would play with you again which were things I couldn’t answer.’

Nora’s shoulder’s stiffened with an unexpected pain. She didn’t remember any of this. ‘Kathryn, that must have been so hard for you.’

‘It was,’ she conceded. ‘But not as hard as having to rely on Mum after my operation. She did what she could to help but after everything with her and Dad, I could never fully trust her to be there till the end. That’s why I got Mel to help. She’d always been there for me.’

‘And I haven’t.’ Nora suddenly squeezed her sister’s hand. ‘I’m so sorry, Kathryn.’

‘I’m sorry too. But my kids love you. I love you. And it’s time to move on. Being so poorly and you being there for me taught me that we can rely on each other if we trust each other and try.’

‘You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to,’ Nora added quickly. ‘It’s totally up to you.’

Kathryn got up and put the kettle on. ‘I had a hysterectomy.’

Nora stared, unable to respond. She’d imagined an appendicitis. Something run-of-the-mill that required light surgery. Never had she ever thought it could be something as big as that. Her sister was only five years older than her. Nora’s concern suddenly shot up again making her voice quiver. ‘But why? What’s happened?’

‘They found I had borderline ovarian cancer.’

‘Cancer!’ The word shot around her brain setting off a million alarm bells. She decided then and there that she’d come down every weekend and help out so Kathryn could rest. The thought of losing her sister brought tears to her eyes.

‘It’s all right,’ Kathryn said, rubbing Nora’s shoulder. ‘It was only borderline, and they’ve removed everything so the chances of anything else happening are really low.’

‘But that means you can’t have any more children.’

‘I know, but I don’t want anymore, so it was an easy decision to make.’

She wiped a tear from her cheek. ‘Do the kids know?’

‘They know I had to have an operation, and it was going to take me a while to recover but they don’t know what for. I’ll tell them when they’re older, but they don’t need the worry. They’re so little.’

Nora stared down at the tabletop. ‘And you’re fine. You’re going to be okay?’

‘Yes,’ she laughed. ‘It really is, okay, Nora.’

Overcome with emotion, Nora launched to standing, wrapping her sister in a hug and holding her tighter than she ever had before. The last ten years of barely speaking seemed so ridiculous now. Kathryn had handled a lot more than Nora ever realised.

‘I’m so sorry I wasn’t there to help.’ Kathryn returned her embrace and after a moment the two sisters separated. ‘If you need anything once I’ve gone back, just let me know and I’ll come down every weekend.’

Kathryn titled her head. ‘Let’s not push our luck.’

Nora laughed. ‘Okay, every other weekend at least.’

The kettle boiled, and Kathryn went to make the tea. ‘Now that sounds doable.’

Chapter 28

‘Have we got everything ready?’ asked Abe, re-arranging the small table of glasses and refreshments they’d set out for the book speed-dating night. He’d been extra jittery, fussing with everything and dithering about in a very endearing way. Nora rubbed his arm.

‘I’ve checked and triple checked and I’m sure we haven’t forgotten anything.’

‘I just wish Alex were here.’

‘So do I,’ she replied with a small smile. She hoped it came across as a I’m-missing-him-in-a-totally-professional-capacity, rather than my heart-hasn’t-stopped-aching-all-day kind of way.

She’d resisted the urge to text or call. Although she desperately wanted to know more and shout at him, calling him every name under the sun, she really just wanted to know if he was coming back. Seeing Abe’s forlorn face, frustration surged again. It was one thing to leave her, but it was quite another to leave Abe. This whole night had been his idea, and an incredible number of people had signed up for it. It was bound to be a success and Alex should have been there to celebrate with his dad.

A light tap at the door drew her attention and she saw that it was Fiona and Becky. As Abe was straightening a couple of books on one of the little tables, she went to let them in. ‘Hello, ladies.’

Fiona bustled in, excitement writ on her face and clear in her bouncy step. She immediately looked at the books that had been chosen. The shop and the junk room – she really needed to start calling it the Reading Room – were all set out with small tables and chairs. On every table lay three or four books, depending on how many it could seat. Nora had thought long and hard about whether to arrange books by genre, having a romance table and a thriller table, but as the idea was to mimic a speed date where you didn’t know who you were going to meet, she’d decided to mix everything up. It had been fun choosing the books and the thought that in a few days’ time she’d be getting on a train to return to London and would no longer be holding, touching and, she almost blushed at the thought, sniffing books, made her heart ache even more.

‘Hey,’ Becky said, appearing at her side. Nora had been so lost in thought she hadn’t seen her approach. ‘Looking forward to going home?’

‘No, not really,’ she confided.

‘Why not? I thought you’d be excited. You get your life back. No more playing nursemaid, wearing nice clothes to work – not that you don’t always look nice – I just meant, you know, suits and stuff. Oh, God, this is why I don’t go out much.’

Nora laughed and hoped it would relieve some of the blush from Becky’s cheeks. ‘Don’t worry, it takes more than that to offend me. I know exactly what you mean. In London, I can’t rock up wearing a jumper and jeans, I’d get fired.’ She looked around the bookshop. ‘I’m really going to miss this place.’

‘I’m really going to miss you,’ Becky said, fiddling with her fingernails. ‘If it wasn’t for you and the book group, I might have gone mad. I love Toby but it’s nice to be myself again. And without the book group, which I think will grow after tonight, I’d still be stuck in the house with no friends.’

‘Oh, Becky,’ Nora wrapped her in a hug.

‘You will keep in touch, won’t you?’

‘Yes, of course I will.’

Becky wiped her nose. ‘Right, shall we let that crowd in?’

Nora had been so busy with Becky she hadn’t noticed the line gathering outside the shop. No matter which window she looked through, it was hard to make out the view, obscured as it was by chatting customers. Despite everything a huge smile tugged at her cheeks. Abe should be so proud of himself. He turned to her.

‘Would you like to do the honours, Nora?’

‘Me? No, you should do it. This is your shop.’

‘Yes, but flower,’ he came over and took her hands, and stared directly into her eyes. ‘All this wouldn’t have been possible if it wasn’t for you.’

Tears welled in Nora’s eyes. ‘Oh, Abe! What was it that changed your mind? At first you were so unsure.’

‘It was Lou at the bakery, actually.’

‘Lou?’

‘When I went for a walk after hearing all your ideas, I was so overwhelmed I didn’t know what to think. She told me to stop being so silly and listen to you. You gave me the kick up the bum I needed. Actually, it wasn’t a kick up the bum, it was a gentle prod in the right direction. You were so understanding and kind and didn’t push me to do things I didn’t want to, but once you got started, I knew that it was what my dear Muriel would have wanted. She wouldn’t have wanted me sat around, sulking. She’d have wanted me to keep going, to move forwards and thanks to you, I am.’ Nora swallowed hard. ‘Now you go and open that door and let those folks in. It’s time to sell some books.’

Nora stood aside to let the flood of people in. She hoped against hope that she would see Alex. That he’d be at the back of the crowd, or would appear at the end of Smuggler’s Lane, striding towards her like Heathcliff or Mr Darcy. None of those things happened, and she felt the disappointment sink from the top of her head down to the souls of her shoes, she put a smile back on her face and went inside to make the evening a success for Abe and for the bookshop she’d always adored.

The evening flew by and was a huge success. They sold book after book as people discovered new genres and authors they never knew existed. She and Abe darted between the Reading Room and the front of the shop and even had to rope Fiona into manning the till at one point. Becky ended up in charge of the drinks and somehow managed not to run out of booze. By the end of the night, they were all exhausted but still Alex hadn’t turned up. The bitter disappointment put Nora off her own glass of congratulatory wine, and she put it on the table, wanting nothing more than to go back to the cottage and sleep.

‘I can’t believe how much we’ve made tonight,’ said Abe, coming back from cashing up the till.

‘We should make it a once-a-month thing,’ said Nora, unable to stop herself thinking about the bookshop and how successful it could be if they just kept going.

Abe said, ‘Do you think you’d like to – no it’s all right. Never mind.’

‘What?’ asked Nora, but Abe just shook his head. Whatever thought he’d had, he wasn’t ready to share it yet, or he’d changed his mind. Becky gave a loud yawn and Fiona quickly followed.

‘You’ve made me yawn too,’ Fiona joked.

‘Leave the glasses, guys,’ Nora said. ‘I don’t mind coming in a bit earlier tomorrow to wash everything up and get the place ready for the day.’

‘Are you sure, dear?’ Fiona asked. ‘It’s no bother.’

‘Honestly, it’s fine.’ She wanted to be in the book shop as much as possible until she had to go back on Sunday. ‘You guys get home.’

As Fiona and Becky were gathering their things, a tall, dark and handsome figure appeared in the doorway and as Nora followed their gaze, she gasped.

She stared as Alex walked in. He looked exhausted, his chin smattered with five o’clock shadow that only made him appear brooding and sexy as hell. Nora told herself to calm down but as lustful as it made her, her anger soon took over. Before she could speak, he walked right up to her.

As he stood staring at her, examining every inch of her face, Becky and Fiona shuffled out of the shop and Abe, with a pat on his son’s back, walked past them both and went up to the flat leaving them alone. Alex was so close to her she could feel his breath moving strands of her hair and the intensity of his gaze tightened her spine. She searched for something to say but couldn’t settle on any one thing. She wanted to shout at him, swear at him, accuse him of deceiving her.

‘Before you say anything,’ he began, his voice wavering. ‘I need to explain. I’ve been thinking about it all day, finding the right words, trying to get them in the right order.’ A smile flickered across his face, but she couldn’t share it. Not until she knew exactly what had been going on and if the man she’d reconnected with was who she thought.

‘It all started when Mum died. Cassie – my wife – I’d been seeing her for about three months when Mum passed away. It hit me so hard, harder than I realised at the time. I thought I was doing the right thing by asking her to marry me. Losing Mum made me believe that you have to grab hold of life with both hands because you have no idea when it’s going to end. It scared me so much and Cassie and I were still in that honeymoon phase where everything’s perfect, but I thought it was true love. A little while after Mum died, Cassie suggested a holiday, she was trying to cheer me up. We went to Vegas and one night – one drunken, stupid night – we went to a chapel and got married. We weren’t even living together. When we got back, things started going downhill almost immediately. We gave notice on our respective places and rented a house, but all we did was argue. I soon realised what a mistake I’d made, all because I was scared of how tenuous life was. It all got worse until we barely spoke and were angry strangers living in the same house. It was horrible for both of us. I moved out into my own place, but we hadn’t sat down and discussed actual divorce. Until today.

‘After last night – with you – I drove straight to Cassie and told her it was time we actually sorted the paperwork. I want to be with you, Nora and not because I’m scared of what the future holds like I was with Cassie, but because I’m scared of what the future holds for me if you’re not by my side. You were the most amazing person I ever met when we were sixteen and you’re still the most amazing person I’ve ever met ten years later. Mum always said you were the one that got away and even though she’s not here anymore, she’s still right. At the back of my mind, it’s always been you, and then you turned up here and I realised I’d been hiding from myself, from my grief, from my embarrassment over my bad decision in marrying Cassie. But you need to understand, Nora—’ His eyes were pleading. ‘I never meant to lie to you. I just didn’t know how to tell you about Cassie. I don’t want you to think I’m a cheater. I’m not. I never cheated on Cassie. We’d already split when I kissed you.’ He searched her face for a response. ‘It was the most amazing kiss of my life.’

Nora inhaled sharply. It had been pretty spectacular for her too. She hadn’t realised herself until recently that Alex had always been in her thoughts, ever present since the day they’d met. Every man she’d ever dated had been compared to him. Kind sweet, funny Alex. He was her soul mate. The only person who understood her fully and knew her inside and out. He knew how to make her laugh, how to lift her up when she was down and how to break her barriers when she let them build up. Relief flooded her that he hadn’t cheated on his wife. She wasn’t sure that was something she could ever forgive after the way it had ravaged her own family. But he wasn’t a cheater. He was a decent, honest man. They’d wasted so much time and she didn’t want to waste a moment more. ‘Is that everything?’

‘I think so.’

‘You should write it down for your book.’

‘I’d quite like to kiss you again first if I may?’

Nora felt her whole body smiling. ‘You may.’

Alex bent his head. A tingling started in her lips and penetrated through her body wrapping around her heart and soul and inching its way into every muscle. He pulled her closer. There was only this moment, the two of them in the bookshop she loved and the hope of a future together.

‘What happens next?’ she asked gently, as they parted.

‘Tonight?’ The look of excitement on his face made her laugh.

‘I meant more about the future for us. I’m due back in London on Sunday, remember?’

‘Don’t worry. I’ve got an idea about that, but back to tonight…’ He kissed her again and after a few moments, they made their way back to Pebble Cottage and the enormous bed she’d enjoyed snuggling into. Only this time she wouldn’t be alone.

Chapter 29

The day of the grand re-opening came, and Nora rolled over in bed, her arm reaching out for Alex who had been a relatively permanent feature there since arriving back on Tuesday night. She’d never felt more content or happier. This was where she belonged: the little town she’d been running away from her whole life. She pushed the thought away and focussed on the other side of the bed.

Alex sleepily opened his eyes and smiled at her from across the pillow. ‘Morning.’

‘Morning. Are you excited? It’s grand re-opening day.’

He pulled her over so her head rested on his chest. She loved the feel of his lips on her hair and his bare skin against her cheek. Though she’d tried to enjoy the euphoria of the last few days, she’d been worried about what would happen come Sunday when she had to return to London. Would he go back to York and they’d have a long-distance relationship? Would he want to come to London or stay in Little Harbour? She’d tried to talk about it with him, but Alex had assured her he was just working out some things and all would be revealed today. She trusted him, but the waiting had been terrifying and distracting.

‘I suppose we better get up,’ he said with a yawn. ‘As it’s the big day. I need to stop off at the bakery and collect all the pastries and canapés.’

As sleep wore off and worry was replaced with excitement, Nora wriggled with the energy mounting in her body. ‘I can’t wait to get the day started. Come on.’ She sprang out of bed and got dressed, throwing his clothes at him and hurrying him up. ‘We’ll grab some breakfast from the bakery, I want to make sure everything’s ready and spick and span.’

They walked the few streets to Smuggler’s Lane and down its narrow, cobbled road. Nora couldn’t stop smiling when she saw Abe out front of the shop already, sweeping and watering the pots of plants and long window baskets they’d added. The flowers were bright against the white of the exterior and a fitting end to the beauty of Smuggler’s Lane. Red and yellow blooms burst underneath the huge front window and were reflected in the glass that still shone from their big clean and subsequent weekly polishing.

Nora paused at the bakery window, taking a moment to decide what treat she wanted for breakfast. She was famished and would need her energy. It promised to be a busy, exciting day. She decided on one of their amazing bacon and cheese pastries and a coffee, that would be more than enough. She went in and ordered from Lou, who was as cheerful as usual behind the glass counter.

‘We’ve got all your bits ready. Claire is just loading Alex up with them.’

Alex appeared holding large trays covered with boxes of food. His head just about peered over. ‘I’ll take these straight to the shop, okay?’

Nora nodded and waited for her food order. ‘You better add one on for Alex and another for Abe too,’ she said to Lou’s back as she rang the cost into the till. ‘It’s going to be a busy day for all of us.’

‘We’re all looking forward to it so much. I’ve got my Saturday girl coming in soon so I can come over and watch Abe cut the ribbon. And I’ve been encouraging all my customers to come down too.’

‘Thank you so much, Lou. You’ve been brilliant.’

‘Right, there you are.’ She handed over three white paper bags with the delicious treats inside. ‘That should get you through till at least lunchtime.’

‘I’ll probably be back for something else by then,’ Nora joked. She’d already spied the delicious looking quiches in the far corner of the display cabinet. ‘See you shortly.’

Fairly dancing across the street, Abe was still sweeping up the last of the dirt into a neat little pile and Nora gave him a kiss on the cheek.

‘Oh, flower! What did I deserve that for?’

‘I’ve so enjoyed being back these last few weeks. I’ve loved being here in the bookshop with you. I’ll really miss you,’ she said, tears threatening her eyes, and she saw, Abe’s too. ‘You deserve this place to be bright and busy.’

His eyes glistened, but he smiled, drying them a little. ‘Thank you, flower. Shall we set up that ribbon? Alex is sorting the food, and the book group should be here soon. Once they’re all in –or out, should I say – we can get the ribbon over the door ready for our official re-opening. What colour did you choose in the end?’

‘Blue. As we’re right near the sea. It seemed to fit.’

‘Perfect. Right, grab that dustpan and brush and let’s get this last bit cleared up.’

Nora did as she was told and then shared out the breakfasts. It was nine o’clock, and the book group would be arriving soon, ready for the ribbon to be cut at ten. Some of the tables they’d used for the speed dating night had been brought down again and instead of carrying books, they were laden with platters of canapés and stacks of serviettes. Nerves bubbled up as Nora hoped the town would see the bookshop as the heart of the High Street and come to celebrate its new lease of life. Even Kathryn had said she’d come down with Avril and Ozzie. Their relationship had been going from strength to strength as though a weight had been lifted from both of them. The air was now clear and free from hurt. They’d laughed and joked, and pottered around together, gossiping like friends as Kathryn’s health improved even more now the infection was gone.

She gazed around at all the changes which made her heart sing. Muriel would be so happy to see the place so full of life and love again. There was still so much Abe could do and with Fiona volunteering when needed, he wasn’t going to be alone and as Nora would be coming home more often to see Kathryn, she could stop in too and tell him her latest idea for the shop. She didn’t think they’d ever stop buzzing around her brain.

The sun was shining, and it was shaping up to be a beautifully warm spring day, so they left the front door open while finishing off their last few jobs.

‘Knock, knock?’ came a voice she recognised instantly and whirling around she almost lost her balance, pushing over the pile of books she was just about to shelve.

‘Scott?’ Nora ran and wrapped her arms around him.

‘Hello, gorgeous. You’re looking wonderful. Very happy and healthy.’

‘I am both of those things,’ she replied with a grin. ‘What are you doing here?’

‘I wasn’t going to miss your grand re-opening and the culmination of all your hard work. It looks amazing. You’ve clearly worked harder here than you ever did at work’

She smacked him on the arm. ‘Cheeky. I didn’t expect you to come down. Are you staying the night? We can travel back together tomorrow.’

‘Okay,’ he replied, but he kept his eyes away, admiring the rest of the shop.

Nora quickly introduced Scott to Alex and Abe as the book group arrived. Fiona had made a cake for them all to have afterwards and Becky had brought Toby and Rob along. Nora was surprised to see them talking conspiratorially in the corner with Alex, but Becky soon broke away. Becky rolled her eyes as she walked towards Nora, bouncing Toby on her hip. ‘Men, hey? Get them together and they gossip more than we do.’

‘What are they talking about?’ Nora asked, trying to enhance her hearing enough to snatch a few words or read their lips, neither of which she was able to do.

‘Just catching up, I think. So, are you ready for this place to officially re-open and become the best bookshop in the county again?’

‘I think so.’ Nora was unable to hide the hint of sadness in her voice and Becky understood her feelings. Nora brushed the tiny tear that had escaped away. ‘Today’s not a day for sadness though, is it?’

Clicking into work mode, Nora ushered everyone outside and into Smuggler’s Lane in order to tie the ribbon over the door. Making sure she had the scissors in her back pocket first, she and Alex fastened the ribbon in place and tied a big bow in the middle.

The crowd that had gathered almost took her breath away. Gladys and Fiona were one side of the doorway, chatting happily, and the whole of Smuggler’s Lane was full. All the shopkeepers had come out, happy to see how beautiful the end of their street now was. People from all over the town had arrived too, eager to see the changes and celebrate with them all. Just opposite the door, Kathryn stood with the children in front of her. They waved at Nora and though Nora wasn’t a hundred percent sure, she thought there was a look of pride on Kathryn’s face. Even Mel was there and from the way she gave a brief nod of the head, it seemed Kathryn had told her the truth about the incident.

Nora handed the scissors to Abe and stood to the side with Alex. He wrapped his arm around her waist, and she snuggled into him, taking in the clean smell of his clothes and the heady scent of his aftershave. Scott was on her other side, looking on like a proud older brother, and she couldn’t believe he’d come all the way down just for her.

‘Right, everyone,’ Abe said standing a little taller. ‘Thank you all for coming. It’s been wonderful to have Nora back and what a new lease of life she’s given, not only the shop, but me too.’ He cocked his head as he looked at her and she took a deep breath to keep her emotions in check. If she wasn’t careful, she’d be bawling her eyes out within minutes. ‘And look what she’s done to the place. If you think the outside looks amazing, you’ll be blown away by the inside. We’ve a proper little kiddies’ corner.’

Avril and Ozzie bounced on the spot.

‘And we’ve a Reading Room, so you can even try before you buy! But most of all, Nora Bell has turned this place back into the beautiful bookshop it was when my Muriel and I first started it all those years ago.’

Seeing the emotion in Abe’s face, Nora pressed her hand to her chest as if she could keep the feelings there. She felt Alex’s eyes on her, and he placed a kiss on her forehead.

‘But she hasn’t done it alone. She’s even managed to tempt my Alex back to help and as they’re now a couple, she might even take him off my hands for good, but hopefully not too far away.’ Nora’s brow creased in confusion as Abe walked over and took her hand, rubbing it in a fatherly way with his thumb. ‘Before I cut this ribbon, I do need to ask this amazing young lady something. Nora, you love this bookshop and books are in your blood. I’ve already talked to Alex and though he loves the shop, he has plans of his own, would you like to come and run the bookshop with me?’

A very unladylike ‘huh?’ noise escaped from Nora’s mouth, and she clapped her hand over it to make sure no more came out. ‘Me? Run the bookshop with you? Are you sure?’

Abe nodded and she turned to Alex who was grinning wildly. ‘I told you I had a plan.’

‘But what about you?’ she asked him.

‘I’ll be staying here. Rob has another cottage I can rent, long term, and it’s not too far from yours. He also told me he’s sorted out your cottage as a long term rent too.’

‘Has he?’ She looked around for him and saw him stood with Becky, both delighted to be helping her make a new start.

Alex cupped her face again and she heard Scott say ‘aww!’ rather loudly. ‘I thought moving in together might be a bit much straight away. I want to take things slowly and take our time to make this the best thing possible. I love you, Nora Bell.’ He brushed her cheek as a stray tear escaped.

‘And,’ said Scott, leaning in. ‘I’ve already brought all your stuff down in the car, so you might as well stay here.’

‘You packed all my stuff?’ He nodded. ‘How did you know?’

‘I had a little inkling when I came down last week.’

Nora’s jaw loosened and she felt her mouth about to hang open. ‘I can’t believe it.’

Abe cleared his throat. ‘So, is that a yes?’

‘Yes,’ she shouted, launching herself at him and wrapping him in a hug. ‘Yes, please.’

‘Then we better cut this ribbon together, hadn’t we?’

Abe gently led her away from Alex and she placed her hand on top of his as another amazing idea for the bookshop struck her.

‘Abe, is now a good time to talk about re-naming the bookshop?’ The crowd sniggered as Abe rolled his eyes.

‘What did you have in mind?’

‘How about, The Little Bookshop of Hopes and Dreams?’

His wide smile and sparkling eyes told her it was a yes.

As the ribbon fell away and the crowd entered the shop, she was certain that was exactly the right name for this amazing place where dreams really do come true.

Dear reader,

I hope you’ve enjoyed this free eBook as a thank you for signing up to my mailing list. It’s thanks to your support that I’m able to keep writing so I’m incredibly grateful to every single one of you!

As well as the books I’ve published under my own name, I also write contemporary romance as Annabel French and historical Fiction as Emma Royal, so if you fancy reading some more of my stuff, do check them out.

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Lots of love,

Katie

xxx

Table of Contents

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

Chapter 6

Chapter 7

Chapter 8

Chapter 9

Chapter 10

Chapter 11

Chapter 12

Chapter 13

Chapter 14

Chapter 15

Chapter 16

Chapter 17

Chapter 18

Chapter 19

Chapter 20

Chapter 21

Chapter 22

Chapter 23

Chapter 24

Chapter 25

Chapter 26

Chapter 27

Chapter 28

Chapter 29